I'll bring back-up wine for the rest of the posters about to join the hill with us.
"I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings..."
"Well, do you tell someone you're sorry if you hurt their toe when you step on it?"
"I don't get it."
"It doesn't matter if you didn't mean to hurt me, you still did. You'd apologize to someone for stepping on their foot but you won't apologize for putting me in tears. I now know where we stand."
FTR, this was with ex-bf. Dark Boyfriend (current bf) didn't take that much talking to. He genuinely cares about me, he's just really daft sometimes. He has the mindset of, "If I'm not wrong, I'm not going to apologize." I had to tell him that apologizing doesn't make you wrong, it makes you caring. He got it pretty quickly.