- let me start by saying I have been trying to set boundaries, when we were married I was the one who made the money "work" - I have tried to be nice (let him know about school picts., etc), but his normal M.O. when he orders school picts., etc is to pay back anywhere from 2 weeks - 8 weeks later and I'm done with it.
A week ago, when I met ex midway between our two places, ex asked to borrow $ for gas so he could get home (he did this in front of our DS
). I told him I didn't have the cash - and left with DS. (I
didn't have the cash, but I wasn't going to charge it either)
DS and I had a talk about how I felt, how he felt, and financial responsibility (btw - I felt awful & sick to my stomach, etc. - and yes later I cried about it)
Then, once home, I discovered that ex had ordered from DS's school fundraiser, but hadn't included $ or a check
. DS told ex over the phone that he'd have to pay before the orders were due...ex ponied up a check.
This was not the first time he's asked for $ in front of our DS (and last time it was rather obvious that I wanted to say no)... and he promised to mail a check as soon as he got home (his debt card was declined at a restaurant where he & DS had eaten). He didn't pay until I called & asked if the check had gotten lost in the mail - about 9 days later - his excuse? "I forgot."