I might have missed this in this thread or in another one, so forgive me if this is a duplicate question.
What do you do, though, when you ask a relative for gift suggestions, and she says to make a donation/contribution to the Turquoise Tortoise Society in her name and gives you no other ideas? What does one do when they are fundamentally opposed to the organization the gift recipient specifically asks you to support in her name? Should you explain why you aren't going to make a donation in her name (because while you don't have problems with turquoise tortoises in general, you don't approve of the society's methodology, or because they move too slow, or you really think they should be purple instead...)? The same person would not make a donation to one of your favorite charities, because she finds their practices "wrong".
How do you say, "Nope, not gonna do that. How about a subscription to the Jelly of the Month Club?"