General Etiquette > Life...in general

Wait...What???? I'm Absolutely Flabbergasted, New Update #107

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NyaChan:
Hey - this is one of those, why did you tell me this?? moments, and I'm not sure what to do.

BG:  I have a Friend who is also friends with my close friend Jenny (from the birthweek thread).  She does not like or get along with Todd, Jenny's boyfriend  & my close friend.  When she makes comments around me about them usually centered around complaining about their "coupleyness" that no one but her seems to see or get upset about, I either point out that I saw nothing wrong with how they were acting or change the subject as soon as is humanly possible.  A particular point of mockery for Friend is that Todd and Jenny had rings made that reads T(heart)J & J(heart)T - A bit cheesy in my opinion, but they like it and that's what matters, besides - the rings are so discreet that I have yet to notice them.

Recently Jenny asked Friend to feed her cat while she and Todd were out of town.  Friend came to see me a couple of weeks later, and pulled out her cell and proceeded to laughingly tell me that she just had to show me a picture that she took and sent to her friends who don't go to our school & live in a different state.  I look over to her cell and my jaw drops.  Friend, while going into Jenny's apartment to feed her cat, found that Todd had forgotten his ring.  She took a picture of the ring and sent it out to her friends to show them an example of what she had been talking about all this time. 

I questioned her a bit as to what she had done - hoping against hope that the picture had been taken with permission and not during the time Jenny and Todd were out of town.  She said no, she had taken it when she went in to feed the cat.  I imagine my face was showing my shock, because she immediately said "Well it's not like I went looking for it in the apartment, he left it on the table!"  All I could think to say was "Wow.  I am NEVER leaving you alone in my apartment ever!"  Her response was limited to expressions of how her friends who had received the picture had thought it was hilarious and sooo ridiculous.  It was clear that she didn't think she had done anything wrong, and I didn't know what to say so I pretended to just start studying again so she would stop talking.

 Now I don't really know what to do.  What she did feels like a complete invasion of trust and privacy to me, but maybe I am overreacting?  At one point I even felt guilty because I had posted about the birthweek and wondered if I was just as bad - but then I didn't do that to mock them or be malicious.  Part of me keeps thinking of how I would feel if someone did that to me, and if a friend knew and didn't tell me, but Jenny would be extremely hurt to find that Friend did this, and right now is one of the most stressful times of the year - finals :(  Does anyone have an opinion on whether Friend crossed the line, and if so how bad of a violation is it?  Do you think I should tell Jenny what happened or would that just be stirring up trouble rather than helping? 

artk2002:
I would say that your feeling is correct, that "Friend" cannot be trusted. After that, I certainly wouldn't be allowing her into my home unsupervised.

DottyG:
Looks to me like Friend is so jealous that she's about to burst.  Classic cover-up.

And I agree with Art.



Fleur-de-Lis:

--- Quote from: artk2002 on December 12, 2011, 06:09:42 PM ---I would say that your feeling is correct, that "Friend" cannot be trusted. After that, I certainly wouldn't be allowing her into my home unsupervised.

--- End quote ---

I agree.

WhiteTigerCub:
Friend has too much interest in T & J relationship. The lady doth protest too much. 

I'd start bean dipping her anytime she mentions anything about the 'couple'.  The relationship is really none of her business.

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