AYE YI YI! Last night one phone call almost wiped out our whole family with the brain hemorrhages...
My brother is trying to log onto his bank account and pay bills online. Online system is nightmarishly behind and outdated - won't let him log in, various ridiculous tech problems, etc. He calls the bank. They give him the run around. Frustrated, he has the following exchange with the rep:
Bro: (sarcastically) Well what am I supposed to do now, go back to writing checks?

Rep: (completely serious) Yes, that would be a possible solution to the issue.
Bro:

Look, can we just do this over the phone? I need to get my bills paid.
Rep: No, we need the routing number from you.
Bro: You mean...the routing-
you mean the routing number you gave to me??

At this point, my other brother, who has been listening to the conversation on speakerphone, turns to me with a pained look and says "But - they're. a. BANK."
To sum up: Online banking system not working. Bank reps suggest using checks or coming to the bank in person. Except make sure we have our routing number

Yes, they are a bank. No, they will no longer be our bank.