Author Topic: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt  (Read 1072008 times)

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drzim

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6270 on: December 26, 2012, 02:47:05 PM »
Another twist on courtesy calls and cancellation charges . . .

The last time I went to the dentist, I received a courtesy call reminding me of the appointment. At the end of the message they stated "Please call us back in order to confirm this appointment."

Well, one thing led to another and I never called them back (never had to do this before.)

I showed up for my appointment and the receptionist pretty much admonished me saying (not exact words) "You didn't call back to confirm. You know we require a call back from you. You're lucky we can squeeze you in this time and we won't charge you the missed appointment fee." ???

I clarified with the receptionist what the new rules were. Yes. Even though I made the appt. only 2 weeks before once they call me to remind me of the appt. I am required to call them back within 24 hours prior to my appt. in order to confirm. If I don't my appt. can and probably will be given to someone else and I will owe the $70 missed appt. fee even if I show up.

Does anybody else have to call to confirm an appointment? Or is my Dentist office just odd this way?



Oh, and the last message I received from them clearly stated "It is a new requirement that you must call us back to confirm blah blah blah" Instead of a simple "Please call us back."


This makes no sense.  I always thought the missed appointment fee was to cover the fact that they couldn't schedule anyone else (they are holding the time open for you) and if you don't show up the time is wasted.  If they schedule someone else, or if you do show up, then why the fee? 


Midnight Kitty

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6271 on: December 26, 2012, 02:59:41 PM »
This makes no sense.  I always thought the missed appointment fee was to cover the fact that they couldn't schedule anyone else (they are holding the time open for you) and if you don't show up the time is wasted.  If they schedule someone else, or if you do show up, then why the fee?
So they can rake in more money? >:D
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Diane AKA Traska

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6272 on: December 26, 2012, 03:12:32 PM »
This makes no sense.  I always thought the missed appointment fee was to cover the fact that they couldn't schedule anyone else (they are holding the time open for you) and if you don't show up the time is wasted.  If they schedule someone else, or if you do show up, then why the fee?
So they can rake in more money? >:D

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jpcher

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6273 on: December 26, 2012, 03:15:53 PM »
This makes no sense.  I always thought the missed appointment fee was to cover the fact that they couldn't schedule anyone else (they are holding the time open for you) and if you don't show up the time is wasted.  If they schedule someone else, or if you do show up, then why the fee?
So they can rake in more money? >:D

This.

It's good to know that I'm not the only one that had a brain-hurty moment about this.

mmswm

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6274 on: December 26, 2012, 03:43:27 PM »
Another twist on courtesy calls and cancellation charges . . .

The last time I went to the dentist, I received a courtesy call reminding me of the appointment. At the end of the message they stated "Please call us back in order to confirm this appointment."

Well, one thing led to another and I never called them back (never had to do this before.)

I showed up for my appointment and the receptionist pretty much admonished me saying (not exact words) "You didn't call back to confirm. You know we require a call back from you. You're lucky we can squeeze you in this time and we won't charge you the missed appointment fee." ???

I clarified with the receptionist what the new rules were. Yes. Even though I made the appt. only 2 weeks before once they call me to remind me of the appt. I am required to call them back within 24 hours prior to my appt. in order to confirm. If I don't my appt. can and probably will be given to someone else and I will owe the $70 missed appt. fee even if I show up.

Does anybody else have to call to confirm an appointment? Or is my Dentist office just odd this way?



Oh, and the last message I received from them clearly stated "It is a new requirement that you must call us back to confirm blah blah blah" Instead of a simple "Please call us back."

I would find a new dentist and tell the old one that this policy is why.  I refuse to be treated like that.
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

Kaora

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6275 on: December 26, 2012, 04:24:40 PM »
A conversation with one of my going mentally grandparents last night.  Actually, the whole conversation.  For all of dinner.  With both grandparents (one of them is his new wife, and not in any way related to me save marriage.)  Though, emphasis placed on this one.

He was convinced that mothers felt greater loss at a son leaving the nest, versus a daughter.  Telling this to his daughter, my mother, who was trying to state that she felt it worst when my sister ended up leaving for half a year on a special needs work program.

I'm pretty sure empty nest isn't dependent on the kid's gender?

stkatie00

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6276 on: December 26, 2012, 04:48:04 PM »
Another twist on courtesy calls and cancellation charges . . .

The last time I went to the dentist, I received a courtesy call reminding me of the appointment. At the end of the message they stated "Please call us back in order to confirm this appointment."

Well, one thing led to another and I never called them back (never had to do this before.)

I showed up for my appointment and the receptionist pretty much admonished me saying (not exact words) "You didn't call back to confirm. You know we require a call back from you. You're lucky we can squeeze you in this time and we won't charge you the missed appointment fee." ???

I clarified with the receptionist what the new rules were. Yes. Even though I made the appt. only 2 weeks before once they call me to remind me of the appt. I am required to call them back within 24 hours prior to my appt. in order to confirm. If I don't my appt. can and probably will be given to someone else and I will owe the $70 missed appt. fee even if I show up.

Does anybody else have to call to confirm an appointment? Or is my Dentist office just odd this way?



Oh, and the last message I received from them clearly stated "It is a new requirement that you must call us back to confirm blah blah blah" Instead of a simple "Please call us back."

I would find a new dentist and tell the old one that this policy is why.  I refuse to be treated like that.

This. That's just a ridiculous policy.

Amava

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6277 on: December 26, 2012, 05:33:48 PM »
The thread about the aunt who comments on someone's weight, reminded me of something my stepmother does. But unlike the aforementioned aunt, my stepmother is a sweet person who means nothing wrong with it, so I'm not posting it there but just here because it's just a little bit brainhurty.

Background, I don't see my father and stepmother often, maybe once every few months.
Each time when I meet up with them in summer, my stepmother says: "Have you lost weight?"
Each time I meet them in autumn or early spring or winter at their place, she says: "Have you gained weight? You look healthier!" 
Each time I meet them at Christmas in my own house, she says: "Have you lost weight?"

The thing is, when they see me in summer, I'm wearing fewer clothes. Same in winter when it is in my own house, because my house is always quite warm.
When I meet them in a cold time of the year at their house, I'm usually wearing more layers, because their house is cooler. So I look more "filled up".

The kicker is: each time she asks, bless her, I explain it to her just like I explained it up here.
But she doesn't remember and just asks again the next time.  ;D
It's sort of funny. (Because discussing weight is not such a huge etiquette breach here as it is in America and because she is so sweet. She genuinely is just observing. Inaccurately. LOL. )

Midnight Kitty

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6278 on: December 26, 2012, 06:09:31 PM »
[BG]My husband has had nine (yes 9) operations on his left eye.  As a result, his eye is seriously messed up.  The pupil can no longer dialate, so it is very sensitive to light.  He wears an eyepatch.[/BG]

DH was pulled over by a police officer last week.  He was driving down a busy, brightly lit, thoroughfare.  Traffic was almost at a standstill passing the major shopping center with all the Christmas lights. 

The officer asked DH, "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
DH replied, "No."
Officer:  "You don't have your headlights turned on."
Officer looks at DH's eyepatch again, then adds, "I guess you didn't notice."
DH: "Nope.  Sorry.  I'll be more careful."

I realize it is harder to see his car without the headlights on, but with all the traffic moving at a crawl and the Christmas lights, he could see just fine.

Thank you to the police officer who used his common sense to handle the situation instead of some "zero tolerance" approach.
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Hmmmmm

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6279 on: December 26, 2012, 06:23:03 PM »
Another twist on courtesy calls and cancellation charges . . .

The last time I went to the dentist, I received a courtesy call reminding me of the appointment. At the end of the message they stated "Please call us back in order to confirm this appointment."

Well, one thing led to another and I never called them back (never had to do this before.)

I showed up for my appointment and the receptionist pretty much admonished me saying (not exact words) "You didn't call back to confirm. You know we require a call back from you. You're lucky we can squeeze you in this time and we won't charge you the missed appointment fee." ???

I clarified with the receptionist what the new rules were. Yes. Even though I made the appt. only 2 weeks before once they call me to remind me of the appt. I am required to call them back within 24 hours prior to my appt. in order to confirm. If I don't my appt. can and probably will be given to someone else and I will owe the $70 missed appt. fee even if I show up.

Does anybody else have to call to confirm an appointment? Or is my Dentist office just odd this way?



Oh, and the last message I received from them clearly stated "It is a new requirement that you must call us back to confirm blah blah blah" Instead of a simple "Please call us back."

I would find a new dentist and tell the old one that this policy is why.  I refuse to be treated like that.

this

Luci

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6280 on: December 26, 2012, 08:04:05 PM »
A conversation with one of my going mentally grandparents last night.  Actually, the whole conversation.  For all of dinner.  With both grandparents (one of them is his new wife, and not in any way related to me save marriage.)  Though, emphasis placed on this one.

He was convinced that mothers felt greater loss at a son leaving the nest, versus a daughter.  Telling this to his daughter, my mother, who was trying to state that she felt it worst when my sister ended up leaving for half a year on a special needs work program.

I'm pretty sure empty nest isn't dependent on the kid's gender?

My mother-in-law frequently said, "A son's a son 'til he takes a wife,
                                                   A daughter's a daughter for all of her life."

This hurt me very much because Lucas was constantly at her house slowly taking over chores that they were unable to do because of aging (but never neglecting me and the kids) despite an older son still living at home who did little but take care of himself, and I did a lot of sewing and other chores for her. Her daughter was a fantastic daughter, true to the poem, but it hurt me a lot.

I really feel no differently about our two kids and their children except their different needs and abilities. The love is there for all. (One daughter, one son, 4 granddaughters, 2 grandsons.) I hurt for each when they are ill or hurt, I share their joys, and I gift them equally. And I miss them equally when I don't get to see them much.

Iris

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6281 on: December 26, 2012, 11:38:36 PM »
A conversation with one of my going mentally grandparents last night.  Actually, the whole conversation.  For all of dinner.  With both grandparents (one of them is his new wife, and not in any way related to me save marriage.)  Though, emphasis placed on this one.

He was convinced that mothers felt greater loss at a son leaving the nest, versus a daughter.  Telling this to his daughter, my mother, who was trying to state that she felt it worst when my sister ended up leaving for half a year on a special needs work program.

I'm pretty sure empty nest isn't dependent on the kid's gender?

My mother-in-law frequently said, "A son's a son 'til he takes a wife,
                                                   A daughter's a daughter for all of her life."

This hurt me very much because Lucas was constantly at her house slowly taking over chores that they were unable to do because of aging (but never neglecting me and the kids) despite an older son still living at home who did little but take care of himself, and I did a lot of sewing and other chores for her. Her daughter was a fantastic daughter, true to the poem, but it hurt me a lot.

I really feel no differently about our two kids and their children except their different needs and abilities. The love is there for all. (One daughter, one son, 4 granddaughters, 2 grandsons.) I hurt for each when they are ill or hurt, I share their joys, and I gift them equally. And I miss them equally when I don't get to see them much.

I never interpreted this saying as a rejection of sons, quite the other way around. I took it, rightly or wrongly, as saying that a daughter will continue to confide in her mother about day-to-day concerns whereas a son won't. In the days of strongly defined gender roles that was probably true - after marriage daughters shared the same 'housekeeping' cares as their mother, while sons were out at work providing for the family and therefore removed from the mother's world (where she used to take care of him) to his wife's world. These days it's probably just a stupid saying.

That was my interpretation, though I can see why you might take it differently and be hurt. Just thought it was worth mentioning.
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Poirot thought you could, but forebore to say so.

MerryCat

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6282 on: December 27, 2012, 12:36:40 AM »
About a month ago, I had walked up to a shopping center down the road and stopped into the Family Dollar for something.   I had Piratebabe with me and she made a comment like "Enjoy them while they're this age, it doesn't last long!" I said "Oh I know, I have two others."

"You have three babies?"
"Well, the other two aren't babies, they're 11 and a half and ten."
"But you have three babies?"
"Well, I have three boys, yes."
"But they'll always be your babies, is what I mean."
"Well, yeah."

I don't know what perplexed her so much about me having 3 kids.  I'm told I look younger than I am, but I doubt that I look that much younger that it would be hard for someone to believe I could have 3 kids.

This exchange hurts my brain too. I mean, if they'll always be your babies, then why should their age affect your enjoyment of them?

*edited for clarity.

Redsoil

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6283 on: December 27, 2012, 07:06:45 AM »
I have a slightly different take on the dentist's office requesting a call-back to confirm you will actually show for your appointment.  (Although I don't quite "get" the fee charged structure - seems unusual.)

We have some patients at our clinic who just don't bother to show, even if they've had reminder calls (and often then expect to be "squeezed in" at a time convenient to them, no matter how busy we are). 

So, with some repeat offenders, policy has been changed in a couple of ways.  Either, we do not book them ahead, but require them to call on the day, and if we can find an appointment for them, then that's fine.  If we can't, then unfortunately, that's a natural consequence of past behaviour, where they've not shown repeatedly, which means that people who were on the waiting list could have been seen, but we were unable to do so because someone else didn't show, and didn't call to inform of that.

Or, we will book them in, but upon calling to remind, if a message has to be left, we ask that they call us back to confirm their appointment, otherwise we will not be able to hold it for them.  Again, this is with REPEAT offenders, who have an extreme record of not bothering to show because they "forgot", "something came up", "didn't realise the time", "oh, I felt okay, so I didn't worry" and basically didn't care about the inconvenience to us, or to other patients who were desperate to be seen (and there's only so much emergency wriggle room we can manage, even if we don't take a lunch break!)

In some cases, prior to enacting these requirements for certain patients, they have had (at their request!) a phone call the day prior, a phone call the morning of the appointment, followed by a phone call a half hour before the actual appointment time - guess what?  They STILL didn't show, and there was no acknowledgement of us going above and beyond to try and help them out.  No apologies for waste of time and basically doing a "dog-in-the-manger" of a viable appointment time.)  It got to a point where we said "You know what?  We are not their mothers."  And we're not.  We definitely go above and beyond for our patients on a regular basis, but a point comes when it gets ridiculous, and others are missing out because of the selfish actions of a few.  (Yes, you can probably tell I'm a little passionate about this - people are in pain, needing help, and we do what we can.  However, we need others to play their part too, by using a little common courtesy and consideration.)

So, I can see where the dental office may have had the same pattern with multiple patients, and has enacted this policy to try and best manage their times for people who really need the appointments.

Just my view from the flipside.  May or may not resemble the actual scenario faced by the dental office, but often, people simply don't think (or care about) how their actions (or inactions) are affecting others. 

On the other hand, life throws a curve-ball sometimes, and if patients have legitimate reasons for not attending, it's never a problem, and we'll do our utmost to accommodate them asap for rescheduling.  It's about using resources as best as possible, and being fair to everyone.  We would never penalise someone who genuinely forgot as a one-off, or who had other things come up which caused difficulties, but would work with them to help them out.  It's just the few, the extreme, that have a disproportionately large impact!
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Redsoil

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Re: Exchanges with People that Make Your Brain Hurt
« Reply #6284 on: December 27, 2012, 07:14:55 AM »
PS:  Not saying the OP is "one of those patients", merely that the dentist's office may have had enough of them that they've now implemented "call to confirm" as desired policy to try and see the people who will actually show up!
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