Starry Diadem, the way I always heard it was:
Please, God, run...
BabyMama, your friend isn't that far off. The first iPods were sold in late 2001, so that's only 11.5 years. Also, did you take your iPod to your nearest Apple store? From what you said, you're probably right, but you might ask them if they can wipe and reinstall the firmware, just in case the problem is simply a corrupted OS. It won't cost you anything to ask, and you might be able to save the device.
"One of them said, "so you did have texting then" and I had to explain that we only had simple landlines"
Remember way back when, when you'd use a phone for voice communications? Those sure were the good old days....