I did get gifts from my children. We didn't exchange any this year. They are both adults.
However, I used to "complain" that it didn't seem fair that I still had to buy the ex three gifts a year and he didn't have to give me any. (I didn't ask for alimony so that wasn't in the equation)
When I divorced the kids were 5 and 9. So until they could buy gifts on their own their father got a Christmas, Birthday and Father's Day gift from them. It was more important for me to teach them gift giving then not acknowledge their father's special days.
Yes they usually give me something or do something for me.
I also buy fresh flowers for myself. I like them. When I had very little money I used to tell the kids "Someone who loves me very much bought them for me." Took them a while to figure that one out. But I also explained to my daughter who asked if we were so poor why was I spending money on flowers. I told her that the occasional five dollars was money well spent since it made me smile. Occasionally she would also bring me flowers.
I'd have a serious talk with both Dad and son. Next year, or with your birthday, make your expectations known early on. Also buy a few things you want for yourself and put them under the tree. There is nothing wrong with that. Think about it, you must buy things for yourself all the time. From Thanksgiving to Christmas, whatever you buy simply wrap it and put it under the tree.