Author Topic: Malware Update/Apology  (Read 21689 times)

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cass2591

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #15 on: December 30, 2011, 12:07:27 AM »
@EG: I've stayed out of this until now but what do you want? How often has it been stated on the boards that if you apologise and sincerely mean it, then you apologise. Since when is 'You don't add disclaimers or qualifiers. "I made a mistake, I handled it poorly, I apologise." That is my point.' incorrect? Jeanne is talking about how she related to posters due to her frustration, handled it poorly, owned that and apologized. She was not apologizing for not taking action, or the proper action as some have criticized.


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EduardosGirl

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #16 on: December 30, 2011, 12:18:09 AM »
@EG: I've stayed out of this until now but what do you want? How often has it been stated on the boards that if you apologise and sincerely mean it, then you apologise. Since when is 'You don't add disclaimers or qualifiers. "I made a mistake, I handled it poorly, I apologise." That is my point.' incorrect? Jeanne is talking about how she related to posters due to her frustration, handled it poorly, owned that and apologized. She was not apologizing for not taking action, or the proper action as some have criticized.

What I'm trying to explain is that the apology was offered followed by disclaimers. Personal stress and issues and feeling 'attacked' by people in emails and PMs. Had I sent my concerns via PM, would I have been considered another person just accusing or attacking her? Public statements have been made against individuals and there has been no mention of them in the apology, nor if she plans to rescind the banning of one who was accused of something that was patently untrue.

cass2591

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #17 on: December 30, 2011, 12:31:57 AM »
I interpreted it differently, as will likely the 200+ members of your new group. Seriously, the issue is, if not resolved, certainly on its way to being so. You don't like the way it was handled, fine, move on. What is the point of belaboring this? We're talking one website, one owner, enough already.
There is no pie in Nighthawks, which is why it's such a desolate image. ~ Happy Stomach

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened. ~ Mark Twain

Adopting a pet won't change the world, but it will change the world for that pet.

Scritzy

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #18 on: December 30, 2011, 12:51:06 AM »
I'm glad that things have been resolved. :)
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Ceallach

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #19 on: December 30, 2011, 12:52:33 AM »
I am responding to the Dame's public actions. If we perceive rude or even egregious behaviour, is it not sometimes better to politely call on it in the same forum? I don't believe this is retaliatory rudeness, nor is it inflammatory. The Dame has made statements in public that I strongly disagree with, including statements of negative repute against my friends. Yet I should only address that in PM? If my friend - or myself - is publicly called a liar, I shall address that publicly.

I can assure you I am not trying to cause trouble. My criticism makes up a very tiny proportion of my thoughts and actions regarding the forum. But, again, I felt my concerns warranted speaking up. You don't have to agree with them, but that doesn't make them invalid.

Yes.  But you've not just made a comment and left it, you've repeatedly and consistedly tried to demonstrate that the dame is somehow dishonest, insincere, over-reacting, and treating people badly.

It's the equivalent of the person in the store who instead of politely addressing concerns with the manager starts creating a scene in front of everybody.  It would be fine if you were just asking questions / expressing concerns in response to what she is saying publically, but you're not - you're criticizing her personally and insulting her character.   Even if the manager addressed the entire store to apologize for the queues, you wouldn't start calling out in front of everybody how it's clearly insincere, why haven't they done something about it earlier etc etc.  The type of behaviour designed to start a riot, in fact.  You might ask a polite question or express a concern, but that's very different to what you've been doing here. You haven't been saying "When do you expect to hear back from google?" or "What precautions have been taken to minimise the risk?" or any such constructive comments. It's all been negative.    And no, I don't agree that it's polite to "call" people out on their rude behaviour.  It's certainly ok to address concerns, show spine in the face of an insult, or give the cut direct, but it's not polite to repeatedly say "I think you're rude! You're insincere and have been mean to my friends! I disagree with how you run your life/shop/website!"
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Ceallach

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #20 on: December 30, 2011, 12:53:00 AM »
I'm glad that things have been resolved. :)

Me too.   :)   I'm going to be quiet now, because really that's all that matters!!
"Nobody can do everything, but everybody can do something"


EduardosGirl

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #21 on: December 30, 2011, 01:07:50 AM »
I am responding to the Dame's public actions. If we perceive rude or even egregious behaviour, is it not sometimes better to politely call on it in the same forum? I don't believe this is retaliatory rudeness, nor is it inflammatory. The Dame has made statements in public that I strongly disagree with, including statements of negative repute against my friends. Yet I should only address that in PM? If my friend - or myself - is publicly called a liar, I shall address that publicly.

I can assure you I am not trying to cause trouble. My criticism makes up a very tiny proportion of my thoughts and actions regarding the forum. But, again, I felt my concerns warranted speaking up. You don't have to agree with them, but that doesn't make them invalid.

Yes.  But you've not just made a comment and left it, you've repeatedly and consistedly tried to demonstrate that the dame is somehow dishonest, insincere, over-reacting, and treating people badly.

It's the equivalent of the person in the store who instead of politely addressing concerns with the manager starts creating a scene in front of everybody.  It would be fine if you were just asking questions / expressing concerns in response to what she is saying publically, but you're not - you're criticizing her personally and insulting her character.   Even if the manager addressed the entire store to apologize for the queues, you wouldn't start calling out in front of everybody how it's clearly insincere, why haven't they done something about it earlier etc etc.  The type of behaviour designed to start a riot, in fact.  You might ask a polite question or express a concern, but that's very different to what you've been doing here. You haven't been saying "When do you expect to hear back from google?" or "What precautions have been taken to minimise the risk?" or any such constructive comments. It's all been negative.    And no, I don't agree that it's polite to "call" people out on their rude behaviour.  It's certainly ok to address concerns, show spine in the face of an insult, or give the cut direct, but it's not polite to repeatedly say "I think you're rude! You're insincere and have been mean to my friends! I disagree with how you run your life/shop/website!"

Ceallach, I believe you are going to read exactly what you want to in my posts and there's not much I can do to change that. Regardless of what you believe happened, hot_shaker was accused publically of threatening to create havoc with her sig file. This was untrue. She has now been banned pre-emptively. This has not been addressed.

You believe I'm screaming and trying to start a riot. I am not. I haven't "raised my voice" electronically or otherwise. I believe the Dame wants her site to be healthy and well run. It would be pointless otherwise. That does not negate my other concerns.

In addition, my concerns are not mine alone. They are shared by a number of others. I do not speak for them, but I am not alone in holding them.

Scuba_Dog

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #22 on: December 30, 2011, 01:21:02 AM »
I have two PC's, one laptop and an iPad.  I've accessed EHell multiple times from all of them and never got a virus.  That said, I'm really thankful for the time, effort and energy that was put into trying to figure out what was going on and to ensure the safety of the forum.  All of this over the holidays, too, so I'm sure it wasn't easy. 

I didn't see anything unprofessional or rude in any of the forum responses by EHell Dame.  Maybe the PM's were different, I don't know.  I do know that it takes courage to make a public apology when you feel you have done something wrong.  It then takes grace and understanding to accept that apology.

Thank you for all of the time and effort you have put into trying to figure out and resolve this issue.  I really hope it didn't mar your holiday season.

"If you are going through hell, keep going."
Winston Churchill

Ehelldame

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #23 on: December 30, 2011, 01:24:14 AM »

I can assure you I am not trying to cause trouble.
You are a troll who has once again derailed a thread pushing a personal agenda.  You have not once communicated with me in private.   Your comments referencing my personal life, which I never mentioned, is designed to instigate a fight. 

Taking up another person's offense can be very patronizing.  Hot_shaker has always been quite capable of speaking for herself.  And please don't whine that she's unable to contact me.  People reach me privately all the time via numerous avenues. 



furrcats

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #24 on: December 30, 2011, 01:28:22 AM »
I thank you were fine in your posting dame

Ehelldame

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #25 on: December 30, 2011, 01:30:59 AM »
There are apparently viewers of the forum who have made up their minds that the forum is a source of malware infection for them.  No amount of information or assurance  is going to convince them otherwise.  Those folks will perhaps be comfortable elsewhere and therefore we invite them to go where they are comfortable.  We will continue to do all  in our power to maintain the safety and security of the forum. 

EduardosGirl

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #26 on: December 30, 2011, 01:35:33 AM »

I can assure you I am not trying to cause trouble.
You are a troll who has once again derailed a thread pushing a personal agenda.  You have not once communicated with me in private.   Your comments referencing my personal life, which I never mentioned, is designed to instigate a fight. 

Taking up another person's offense can be very patronizing.  Hot_shaker has always been quite capable of speaking for herself.  And please don't whine that she's unable to contact me.  People reach me privately all the time via numerous avenues.

I apologise, I misread. I was thinking back to another thread that mentioned your recent concerns. It was not mentioned to instigate a fight. How would that even work?

However I am not a troll. Disagreeing with you does not make me a troll. And I can assure you that hot_shaker is not patronised by my speaking here. I've never said she couldn't email you herself, much less whined about it.

As I also stated in another thread, I didn't get any malware from the forum. That's not what I'm talking about.

Ehelldame

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #27 on: December 30, 2011, 02:28:10 AM »

We aren't coming to the conclusion based soley on the order of events. We are basing the conclusion on multiple factors. The 2 main ones are the fact that the virus tried to download when we were only on eHell (not just that it appeared when we had eHell open, but that it was actively blocked from loading onto formerly clean computers when only eHell was open) and the fact that it was the ONLY site that we all had in common.

Of course correlation doesn't prove causation, but at the same time, Occam's Razor (and common sense) should be considered.

One of the persons who reported a few days ago that her work computer had been infected with the Win 7 Security virus emailed me earlier today.  She had taken her computer to the IT person who revealed that hers was the 11th employee computer in 2 days to be infected with the exact same virus via shopping online, opening an ecard, etc.     She further reported that she and the other employees were not on the VPN (Virtual Privacy Network) which the tech explained adds a layer of protection when it is used. 



Larrabee

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #28 on: December 30, 2011, 06:07:55 AM »
Dame, does this mean that the poster who was banned for the actions of other people despite not breaking the rules herself has been reinstated?

That did make me very uncomfortable.  :(

strangetimes

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Re: Malware Update/Apology
« Reply #29 on: December 30, 2011, 06:55:15 AM »
@EG: I've stayed out of this until now but what do you want? How often has it been stated on the boards that if you apologise and sincerely mean it, then you apologise. Since when is 'You don't add disclaimers or qualifiers. "I made a mistake, I handled it poorly, I apologise." That is my point.' incorrect? Jeanne is talking about how she related to posters due to her frustration, handled it poorly, owned that and apologized. She was not apologizing for not taking action, or the proper action as some have criticized.

What I'm trying to explain is that the apology was offered followed by disclaimers. Personal stress and issues and feeling 'attacked' by people in emails and PMs. Had I sent my concerns via PM, would I have been considered another person just accusing or attacking her? Public statements have been made against individuals and there has been no mention of them in the apology, nor if she plans to rescind the banning of one who was accused of something that was patently untrue.

Jeanne's apology wasn't followed by disclaimers or qualifiers, it was followed by an explanation of her uncharacteristic behaviour.

A non-apology is saying something that equates to "I'm sorry you took offense to my perfectly reasonable statement".

An apology with disclaimers is, "I'm sorry I hurt you, but it's really your fault, because you insulted my cat first."

If you're not affected by this issue personally, nor are your friends who've been maligned asking you to intervene on their behalf, why are you continuously airing their gripes? You don't seem willing to accept an apology, so what next? What is it that you'd like to achieve, or the consensus you'd like to reach, with this discussion?