Weird lady at the supermarket

[Ko-Ko]

I have a job as a cashier at a supermarket. A few days ago, I was at my register, when one of my friends came to pay for some things. Among his purchases was a large bag of candy. I made some comment about how he'd never become Miss USA if he continued eating like this. He laughed and went on his way. The lady behind him had come to my register, and I hadn't even greeted her when she starts blasting me on how rude I was, how I was so horrible to customers, how I might cause the "poor dear" to develop and eating disorder, etc. Even though he had laughed at my comment, and I had greeted him by name, I figured the woman didn't realize he was my friend, so I explained it to her. She kept going on and on as if I hadn't spoken at all. The comment wasn't even that bad, considering he couldn't be *Miss* USA anyway. She even threatened to get the Manager! Fortunately, she left without talking to him. Some people like this just make me shake my head in sadness. Oh well, I guess it's not her fault. Someone that disagreeable probably doesn't have any friends, so she doesn't know what interaction between friends looks like. Thanks for reading.

[Rose2Bear]

I guess that's the problem when friends come through your line, you never know whos listening.

Most normal people would have just gone "oh" and stopped when you tell them it was your friend. Becasue she did not, she obviously just felt like snapping at someone and complaining. 

I'd just forget about it, but maybe next time be careful to what you say to your friends when there are other people in line. 

You never know who is listening, and if your store has "secret shoppers" that could end up being a can of worms you don't want to explore.

[DottyG]

I guess that's the problem when friends come through your line, you never know whos listening.

Most normal people would have just gone "oh" and stopped when you tell them it was your friend. Becasue she did not, she obviously just felt like snapping at someone and complaining. 

I'd just forget about it, but maybe next time be careful to what you say to your friends when there are other people in line. 

You never know who is listening, and if your store has "secret shoppers" that could end up being a can of worms you don't want to explore.

I agree with you.  There's a time and a place for joking.  And, perhaps this was not such.

And, I agree that a "secret shopper" could be this OP's downfall if she's not careful.

[Ko-Ko]

I never thought of her being a secret shopper. She probably wasn't though, as that was a few days ago, and nobody has mentioned it to me yet. And even if she was, there was no excuse for yelling. I'll remember to be more careful in the future. Thanks for your responses!

Ko-Ko

[Lunadiana75]

I don't think she did anything worng, Ms. Busybody was waaaaaayyyyy out of line.  The joking was neither offensive nor inappropriate.  Simple case of "let's abuse the retail worker over nothing because we can".  And Secret Shoppers, grrrrrrrrrrr, don't even get me started on them.

[Tagy]

Would a cashier joking with a friend really be something a secret shopper would deduct points for (or however they rate the employee) for?

[Secret]

I'm sure the OP can tell lots of stories of rude things customers in line have been talking about as they wait their turn. I thought the joke was funny.  MALE, MISS USA.  Come-on lady, have a sense of humor, or at least ignore it.  Worst case scenario, calmly state why you did not find it funny.  Eating disorders are serious and the exchange could have been a lot more pleasant.
"YOu may want to be careful about making diet remarks to someone, they may have an eating disorder"
"You are right, I never thought of that.  But just to put your mind at ease, I know him and he's a friend of mine.  He did not take it personally.  But I will be more mindful of that in the future."

OP laughed, her friend laughed, busybody should have butted out.

[Rose2Bear]

Would a cashier joking with a friend really be something a secret shopper would deduct points for (or however they rate the employee) for?

Well, if they didn't discover the fact that they were friends, they might.  At the coffee shop where I work, there is a section about baristas engaging in conversation with other customers, so if something offensive was noted, it might be marked.  I highly doubt this lady was a secret shopper becasue she yelled at the OP so much, a real secret shopper would have noted the situation, but not mentioned it right then and there to the cashier but rather simply progress with her transaction as usual and then write it on the written report, thereby not letting the cashier the opportunity to explain that it was her friend.

Although I do agree the Miss USA comment really isnt bad at all, but I'm just saying, you should always becareful of what you say in public.

[MineralDiva]

Well, "Miss Congeniality" must have felt her crown threatened!  Good heavens, what a twit!

[eport]

My mom was a secret shopper for six years at the grocery store and yes, employees can be marked down/repremanded for what they say to friends. Other customers may not know they are friends and it leaves a bad impression of both the store and its employees.

An example. My mom was in line at the photo department of said grocery store. Employee at the counter (teenager) and her friend (customer) were dicussing how they were both breaking out and hungry as they were ready to start the monthlies. It was noted on my mom's form (with employee name). The following week, she was at the counter again and overheard the manager talking with the employee in the corner ("That topic of conversation was completely inappropriate and I don't care if she was your friend...")

[gjcva1]

An example. My mom was in line at the photo department of said grocery store. Employee at the counter (teenager) and her friend (customer) were dicussing how they were both breaking out and hungry as they were ready to start the monthlies. It was noted on my mom's form (with employee name). The following week, she was at the counter again and overheard the manager talking with the employee in the corner ("That topic of conversation was completely inappropriate and I don't care if she was your friend...")

and i hope your mom noted in her NEXT report that the manager should not be speaking to an employee regarding discipline in front of other employees, let alone customers. 

[wetblanket]

I don't think what you did was so terrible.  He's your friend after all.

Some customers LIKE to joke around.  Too bad Ms. Pathetic couldn't mind her own business.

[lolane]

Well, I can see both sides. I don't like when I am in line and the employee that's helping customers is overly friendly with customers, it is just unprofessional to me (although, I don't think the OP's statement would have bothered be). However, I would never berate the employee or yell at them. If I were really offended I'd simply speak to the manager. Now, if the friend and the employee are chatting it up and holding up the line, then it is perfectly reasonable to say something, but it should be said politely.

[MelJill]

and i hope your mom noted in her NEXT report that the manager should not be speaking to an employee regarding discipline in front of other employees, let alone customers. 

There was one time I thought it appropriate for the manager to speak to the employees about how inappropriate their conversation was despite being in earshot of a customer.

We were at a buffet restaurant, and while I was getting my food at one of the islands, these two 20-something female employees were (while working to fill food on the buffet) openly discussing imminent scheduling of an extremely controversial private medical procedure for one of the two ...  The manager ordinarily is highly visible/circulating around, and he (without touching them) practically marched those two to the back.  I did, however, hear the first part of his lecture to them about how inappropriate that conversation was.

I suppose he could've just said "[name] and [name], back room now ..."  But I wasn't the only customer in the vicinity, and it's likely that someone else snagged him and complained because they were not in the least discreet about it (they were probably on average 3 feet apart and talking so as to be heard by each other in a moderately noisy venue).  I mean, if he hadn't dealt with them before I turned around, I would've said something to him.

[CocoCamm]

I don't like when I am in line and the employee that's helping customers is overly friendly with customers, it is just unprofessional to me

As a former retail employee I must say that sentiments like that make my head want to explode because its such a lose lose situation for a retail employee. You have people who will think you are a b-witch if your not friendly enough and apparently being too friendly is also a problem. The really irritating thing is its all about perception. What you might find as overly friendly someone else might view as not friendly enough. I think customers need to realize that retail employees are just people, some with personalities that you like and some with personalities that you dont. I feel as long as you (in general you) are getting the service you are paying for and you are not treated rudely then you have nothing to complain about.