I wonder why she is fixated on the OP.? or does she do this to others as well.?
She does say occasionally rude things to other people, and church leadership handles those situations as they arise. She, as you say, fixates on me for her clothing remarks. We're very (very!) distantly related, so I think she has a sense that what I wear is a reflection on "our" family or on her personally.
I really wish she were a person with whom confrontation was beneficial. Alas, she just has a notion that, as an elderly person, she's entitled to receive respect while giving none.