Count me in as yet another one who's mother had weight and self-esteem issues that she pushed on me. In fact, for a long time I was actually afraid to have a daughter cause I worried I'd end up doing the same thing to her without meaning to!
I was always a really slender kid, and on the short side, and then roundabout the end of 8th grade, when puberty finally seemed to finally hit me, I started rounding out like girls are supposed to, and that's when the comments of "Keep your girlish figure!" started. My mom would point at pictures of me in a bathing suit and note where I had "fat" or when I was sitting down, she'd poke my thighs and tell me they were getting chubby, and if I was in a bathing suit, she'd frown and point out I had stretch marks on my hips and thighs.
To this day I am still very uncomfortable in a bathing suit, and DH has a hard time convincing me to wear a two piece. I have one...a tankini that covers my belly. The last few times I went to the beach I just wore athletic capris or shorts that could get wet and dry quickly.
In fact, about 2 years ago I lost a dangerous amount of weight and slipped into the mindset of an anorexic. I was on ADD meds which have the side effect of removing your appetite and well, I didn't exactly fight it. I never lost enough to be officially anorexic but I got down to 103, which with my height (5'2") and build, was not very healthy at all and I looked way too thin and not attractive. I threw away the meds and started putting on weight. Course, ironically as soon as I got to a healthy weight, I got pregnant. LOL
I'm now between 127-130 and actually feel pretty good about myself. My belly could use some toning but I've accepted that it'll never be what it was before I had kids. It was funny, I went into a Kohl's recently and bought a couple pairs of size 10 Lee's (used to wear 8's, 6's at my thinnest and they were falling off my hips) and I've never felt so good as I do wearing those size 10's.
My now 9 year old middle son used to think he was fat. He's not at all, heck we have to buy him the slim fit jeans to keep them from falling off his hips. But he is a strongly built boy. My oldest is built like I was as a kid, like a reed, and my parents used to make remarks to Pirateboy2 like "Well you're not going to starve to death anytime soon." While poking his belly...when he was 4 and 5. They never came out and said he was fat, they were very careful about that, but they'd make comments on how much he ate, while praising Pirateboy1 for being so slim. I once told PB2 to take a look at myself and my bff one day, and told him "Look. If Auntie J weighed the same as me, she'd be too thin, because she is simply built bigger than I am. (She's 5'7" and as she calls herself, "rawboned") She's not fat, she's just bigger. You are built bigger than your brother and if you weighed the same as him, you'd be too skinny." He got it, and feels good about himself, now.
One of the reasons we do not speak to my parents anymore.