If You Buy My Dog, You Have to Friend Me on FB

[Twik]

Well, if she wants the pup to breed, perhaps she should first ask if the new owner is willing to do so. Telling someone who is not prepared to take the responsibility of breeding not to neuter the animal is completely irresponsible.

I'm sure it would be discussed as part of the process of buying the pup...

Well, according to the OP:

I guess she also made some flippant comment about how she hoped we weren't planning on neutering him (these are very popular dogs to breed), which we actually are, after talking about it.

So this was sort of sprung on them at the last minute, although it doesn't appear that she's going to enforce it in any way. It still sounds like an odd thing to say, in an era when so many pets are homeless, and the OPs never told her they were looking for a dog to breed.

[Larrabee]

Well, if she wants the pup to breed, perhaps she should first ask if the new owner is willing to do so. Telling someone who is not prepared to take the responsibility of breeding not to neuter the animal is completely irresponsible.

I'm sure it would be discussed as part of the process of buying the pup...

Well, according to the OP:

I guess she also made some flippant comment about how she hoped we weren't planning on neutering him (these are very popular dogs to breed), which we actually are, after talking about it.

So this was sort of sprung on them at the last minute, although it doesn't appear that she's going to enforce it in any way. It still sounds like an odd thing to say, in an era when so many pets are homeless, and the OPs never told her they were looking for a dog to breed.

Sorry I thought we'd digressed from the OP.

I wouldn't friend this br*eeder, she doesn't sound tremendously responsible, but I did want to point out that there are legitimate and sensible reasons for maintaining contact between br*eeder and pup buyer!

[jimithing]

Well, if she wants the pup to breed, perhaps she should first ask if the new owner is willing to do so. Telling someone who is not prepared to take the responsibility of breeding not to neuter the animal is completely irresponsible.

I'm sure it would be discussed as part of the process of buying the pup...

Well, according to the OP:

I guess she also made some flippant comment about how she hoped we weren't planning on neutering him (these are very popular dogs to breed), which we actually are, after talking about it.

So this was sort of sprung on them at the last minute, although it doesn't appear that she's going to enforce it in any way. It still sounds like an odd thing to say, in an era when so many pets are homeless, and the OPs never told her they were looking for a dog to breed.

He's an English Bulldog, and we did consider it. But ultimately, we just don't have the time or energy to do so. Plus, we want to tone down some of the behaviors he's exhibiting, like peeing on anything he can find.

[Ms Aspasia]

I would block her, now, because she is a nutter.

Agreed.  Even if her request comes from a caring place, it is really inappropriate.

[Softly Spoken]

My twos cents are:

Penny #1: The whole high-pressure/FB 'attack' thing was out of line but
Penny #2: Most good b*r*e*e*d*e*r*s do maintain some form of contact with their buyers.

As a dog buyer (or buyer of anything for that matter) it is prudent to maintain a civil relationship with whoever you purchased it from in the event that there are any problems. Purebreds quite often have particular genetic health issues and all responsible sellers have a policy re: liability / health guarantee / replacement dogs.

When my cavlier had to have knee surgery, even though it was past the date listed in our agreement, the seller told me she would give me another dog - I didn't take her up on her offer but she was good to offer and she might not have if I had been unfriendly during our negotiations.

My friend has owned Afghan hounds for years and built up a very valuable relationship with 'her' b*r*e*e*d*e*r* and their network. This enabled her to get good prices, good referrals to vet resources, and wonderful support (and replacement animals) when two of her dogs died from unforseen medical conditions. Her dog seller (*gah* idk why the b-word has to be moderated! ) is on FB w/ my friend (they play FV together lol  ). They are more business 'acquaintances'  (incidentally a new category on FB  ) than friend-friends, but it has been in my friend's interest to foster the relationship.

People usually ask for an email address these days during business transactions, or businesses will say "check out our website/check us out on FB", but the idea of "You bought X from me and now we're FB friends" seems really inappropriate and frankly unprofessional to me.

As long as you have nothing to lose by having her as a potential SS enemy, I would not waste any time worrying about letting her be your "Friend."

[TootsNYC]

I think she's full of baloney.  Once the dog is yours, you can name him whatever you want, breed him or have him neutered, feed him whatever food you like, take him on vacations with you or kennel him -- and you certainly do NOT have to stay in touch with her.  He belongs to you.  She no longer has a vested interest in him.

Yeah, she's doing this backwards. If she really cared about it, if it was a serious tool for protecting the dogs, she'd require you to Facebook-friend her for the three months BEFORE the adoption so she could see what sort of a person you are.

She's come up with this to make herself feel good about it.

One other thing could be to friend her, and then in 2 months, defriend her.

I don't have anything on my Facebook page that other people couldn't know about me. It's all stuff that might come up in a casual conversation with an acquaintance. So this wouldn't really bother me.

[wyliefool]

OT--some people refer to parents of unruly children as 'bre eders' which is why it's filtered here. Altho I've never seen it used in that sense here; only in the dog/horse/cat bree-ding sense.

[Shoo]

OT--some people refer to parents of unruly children as 'bre eders' which is why it's filtered here. Altho I've never seen it used in that sense here; only in the dog/horse/cat bree-ding sense.

Some people use that word to refer to ANY parents, whether their children are unruly or not.

[nyarlathotep]

OT--some people refer to parents of unruly children as 'bre eders' which is why it's filtered here. Altho I've never seen it used in that sense here; only in the dog/horse/cat bree-ding sense.

Some people use that word to refer to ANY parents, whether their children are unruly or not.

Technically it's correct (in most cases). But not very nice at all.

[Lauren]

When my parents bought their first dog of their breed they did background checks and sent pictures of our house and backyard. I'm sure she would have requested FB if it was around then. She'd call every six months and at one point we were offered our dog's mother if we wanted her. She helped my mum get our second and third dog (second as a puppy and third was a rescue dog, same breed) My mum rang her about a week after first dog died and she cried with my mum. Offered to let have one from her next littler if she wanted but mum advised she wasn't ready. Rang six months later and advised about rescue dog. When we lost second dog again offered pup from next litter. Mum explained that as they were retiring they were going to stick with one dog as they could be with her all the time (the only reason we'd had two dogs was because we all worked or were at school and it was for company for the dogs) Then explained that when the time came mum was to call her and she'd get the next pup. Mum still emails her (in fact I think they're FB buddies now!)

[Dr_Manners]

She has his name, because of the bill of sale ...

Did she give you his AKC papers?  He should have them (or the equivalent in whatever country you're in).  If she didn't give them to him, then she is not a certified b*r*e*e*d*e*r. 

I think she's full of baloney.  Once the dog is yours, you can name him whatever you want, breed him or have him neutered, feed him whatever food you like, take him on vacations with you or kennel him -- and you certainly do NOT have to stay in touch with her.  He belongs to you.  She no longer has a vested interest in him.

I do think giving him his own Facebook page might be fun for you and would let her see a couple pictures of him a year without your needing to include her in your private lives.  Maybe you'd want to make sure you only show his face though if a couple of missing private parts are going to stress her out!  LOL!

Not necessarily.  Many b*eeder's contracts include a non-breeding clause, indicating that the dog must be spayed or neutered.

And actually many do have a long-term vested interest in their dogs - for example, they want the dog returned to them if the buyers can no longer care for him/her rather than surrendered to a shelter.  I agree completely that asking all buyers to friend her on FB is a bit much, but I don't think that she's being unreasonable in asking buyers to maintain some level of contact.

I'm curious about the highlighted part here.  I have never owned a dog, and both cats I've ever owned were strays.  So, the intricacies of working with person who sells dogs are a bit outside my purview.  Why would the person who sells dogs want the dog (or cat, I suppose) to be spayed or neutered after sale?

EDIT: Why did it change bree... (you know the word) to "a irresponsible parent of the human variety?"  Seriously, what?!

[wolfie]

She has his name, because of the bill of sale ...

Did she give you his AKC papers?  He should have them (or the equivalent in whatever country you're in).  If she didn't give them to him, then she is not a certified b*r*e*e*d*e*r. 

I think she's full of baloney.  Once the dog is yours, you can name him whatever you want, breed him or have him neutered, feed him whatever food you like, take him on vacations with you or kennel him -- and you certainly do NOT have to stay in touch with her.  He belongs to you.  She no longer has a vested interest in him.

I do think giving him his own Facebook page might be fun for you and would let her see a couple pictures of him a year without your needing to include her in your private lives.  Maybe you'd want to make sure you only show his face though if a couple of missing private parts are going to stress her out!  LOL!

Not necessarily.  Many b*eeder's contracts include a non-breeding clause, indicating that the dog must be spayed or neutered.

And actually many do have a long-term vested interest in their dogs - for example, they want the dog returned to them if the buyers can no longer care for him/her rather than surrendered to a shelter.  I agree completely that asking all buyers to friend her on FB is a bit much, but I don't think that she's being unreasonable in asking buyers to maintain some level of contact.

I'm curious about the highlighted part here.  I have never owned a dog, and both cats I've ever owned were strays.  So, the intricacies of working with a irresponsible parent of the human variety are a bit outside my purview.  Why would the irresponsible parent of the human variety want the dog (or cat, I suppose) to be spayed or neutered after sale?

Two reasons - one is so you don't open a facility in competition to them and the second (and more important) is that most people have no idea how to properly do breeding. You don't just take two dogs/cats/whatever and breed them and see what happens. There is a lot of research and stuff that has to be done to make sure that you are passing on the right qualities and don't add defects and such to the linage. Most irresponsible parents of the human variety do careful work to make sure their dogs follow the guidelines for the specific breeds and have the right kind of temperament.  They don't want to just breeding another dog to yours and then selling them using "their" line as a selling point and then if the dogs have problems it will blow back on them. 

[Dr_Manners]

She has his name, because of the bill of sale ...

Did she give you his AKC papers?  He should have them (or the equivalent in whatever country you're in).  If she didn't give them to him, then she is not a certified b*r*e*e*d*e*r. 

I think she's full of baloney.  Once the dog is yours, you can name him whatever you want, breed him or have him neutered, feed him whatever food you like, take him on vacations with you or kennel him -- and you certainly do NOT have to stay in touch with her.  He belongs to you.  She no longer has a vested interest in him.

I do think giving him his own Facebook page might be fun for you and would let her see a couple pictures of him a year without your needing to include her in your private lives.  Maybe you'd want to make sure you only show his face though if a couple of missing private parts are going to stress her out!  LOL!

Not necessarily.  Many b*eeder's contracts include a non-breeding clause, indicating that the dog must be spayed or neutered.

And actually many do have a long-term vested interest in their dogs - for example, they want the dog returned to them if the buyers can no longer care for him/her rather than surrendered to a shelter.  I agree completely that asking all buyers to friend her on FB is a bit much, but I don't think that she's being unreasonable in asking buyers to maintain some level of contact.

I'm curious about the highlighted part here.  I have never owned a dog, and both cats I've ever owned were strays.  So, the intricacies of working with a irresponsible parent of the human variety are a bit outside my purview.  Why would the irresponsible parent of the human variety want the dog (or cat, I suppose) to be spayed or neutered after sale?

Two reasons - one is so you don't open a facility in competition to them and the second (and more important) is that most people have no idea how to properly do breeding. You don't just take two dogs/cats/whatever and breed them and see what happens. There is a lot of research and stuff that has to be done to make sure that you are passing on the right qualities and don't add defects and such to the linage. Most irresponsible parents of the human variety do careful work to make sure their dogs follow the guidelines for the specific breeds and have the right kind of temperament.  They don't want to just breeding another dog to yours and then selling them using "their" line as a selling point and then if the dogs have problems it will blow back on them.

Ah, that makes sense.  Thanks wolfie!