Hello all. I am writing this on behalf of my significant other/partner/DH...not sure which term to use. He went out of town this weekend, back to his hometown about 3 hours away, to visit some family and friends for a three-day weekend.
While in town today, he and a good friend of his went to lunch. At lunch, they ran in to DH's ex-boyfriend, who I will call Bill.
DH and Bill dated for about three years, with Bill ending things about a year before DH and I met. Though DH was devastated at the time, he understands why it happened. Bill had never dated a man before he dated DH, and ended things when he realized that he could not love a man the same way he loves a woman. So, the relationship ended, DH and I met and got together (I think Bill lost out, personally), and Bill went on to meet a young lady I will call Amanda. Bill did contact DH after meeting Amanda to let him know and to patch things up. Because of that phone call, Bill and DH have maintained a friendly, but not close, relationship.
Anyway, waiting for a table outside the restaurant at lunch today DH sees Bill out with his mother, who DH knows from having been Bill's significant other for three years. DH approached Bill, said hello, and spent a few minutes catching up and exchanging pleasantries.
That is when the following conversation (related to me via DH) occurred.
Bill: Did you hear? Amanda and I got married last month!
DH: No, I didn't know! Congratulations!
*Bill and DH exchange a friendly hug over the good news. At which point, Bill's Mother grabs Bill's arm and pulls him off of DH, glaring at the two of them.
Bill: Well, I'll let you go, it was good to see you again. Congratulations again, and give my best to Amanda.
DH and Friend wander off to the other side of the patio, and begin a conversation. A couple minutes go by, and Bill's Mother approaches DH.
Mother: You know, you and Bill aren't together anymore. Leave my son alone! He's not a part of your lifestyle anymore.
She then wondered off.
DH was shocked, and more than a little confused. Mother and DH had always had a friendly relationship when DH and Bill were together, so he couldn't figure out where Mother's anger and attitude was coming from. But, he didn't say anything to her, and just went back to his conversation with his, now very confused, friend.
About three hours later, DH received a phone call on his cell from Bill. Bill apologized for Mother's reaction, and DH accepted the apology. All would have been ended here, but Bill volunteered that he wanted to invite DH to he and Amanda's wedding, but Mother refused to come if DH was invited. She said it was inappropriate and she would not attend the wedding of her son if he invited his ex-boyfriend.
While DH didn't expect an invitation, nor would he have likely gone if he was invited, he was a bit upset that Mother was so angry about the situation. She had always been nice to him and treated him like family when he was dating Bill, so this attitude was seemingly out of the blue. DH is also upset about the invitation. He isn't upset that he wasn't invited, but he is upset about the way in which his invitation was blocked. Personally, I can see where he is coming from.
So, eHellions, what are your thoughts? Is DH overreacting here? Or, do you think he is okay being upset about what happened with his non-existent wedding invitation? I think his anger/frustration is justified. if Amanda, Bill's wife, didn't like DH or was uncomfortable with him, I would understand Mother barring DH from being invited. However, Amanda (from what DH has told me) knows full well that her now-husband dated a man before her, and she is okay with it. She has, apparently, met DH before and has a positive opinion of him.
I'm not sure what to tell him here. Any advice/reactions would be appreciated.