Author Topic: Used It In Class Today  (Read 26464 times)

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Mental Magpie

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Used It In Class Today
« on: February 24, 2012, 02:13:23 AM »
I have IBS (which, for me, requires two-three medications) and gout (which, again for me, one medication).  Along with those four bottles*, I also had a small bottle of Ibuprofen in the front pocket of my backpack.  I opened up the front pocket to get out a pen when the guy behind me chimed in, "Wow, dealing drugs much?"

Me: What an interesting assumption.
Him: Well you've got all of those pills.
Me: Yes, because I need them.
Him: There's no way you need all of those.
Me: Also a very interesting assumption.

By then I had found my pen after fishing around for it and went about my business fully ignoring him.

Evil Magdalena (I think Evil Dark would be redundant) wanted to try to push Ibuprofen on him like it was the new thing to do.  "Man, you gotta try this Motrin!"

*The stomach ones go with me everywhere because I never know when I'm going to need them.  The gout medication goes with me to campus because that's where I eat and when (with food and the correct time) I have to take it at this point.
The problem with choosing the lesser of two evils is that you're still choosing evil.

Fleur-de-Lis

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #1 on: February 24, 2012, 10:07:21 AM »
I think he made an awkward, rude, and uncalled-for statement, but I think the interesting assumption was yours in thinking he actually meant to imply you were dealing drugs (even the prescription kind).

His statement might have been better met with silence and an eye roll.
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LB

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #2 on: February 24, 2012, 10:10:06 AM »
I think he made an awkward, rude, and uncalled-for statement, but I think the interesting assumption was yours in thinking he actually meant to imply you were dealing drugs (even the prescription kind).

His statement might have been better met with silence and an eye roll.

If it was a joke, it was a lame and insulting one. But if it was a joke, why did he follow it up with "There's no way you need all of those." ?

I think her response was fine. Silence and a private eye roll would have also been fine, I think.

BeagleMommy

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #3 on: February 24, 2012, 10:54:31 AM »
Magdalena, I think you handled that boor perfectly.

Mental Magpie

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #4 on: February 24, 2012, 11:34:17 AM »
I think he made an awkward, rude, and uncalled-for statement, but I think the interesting assumption was yours in thinking he actually meant to imply you were dealing drugs (even the prescription kind).

His statement might have been better met with silence and an eye roll.

His exact words were, "Wow, dealing drugs much?". I don't see where I made any assumption.

I definitely thinkin he was trying to be funny; he just wasn't.
The problem with choosing the lesser of two evils is that you're still choosing evil.

TurtleDove

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #5 on: February 24, 2012, 11:58:06 AM »
I think your reaction was approaching rude. He was trying jokingly interact with you. You didn't think he was funny, but even you admit he was trying to be (and not trying to insult or offend you).

NyaChan

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #6 on: February 24, 2012, 12:02:08 PM »
I have had similar interactions with people - If I know someone is joking, not actually making an accusation, I think the polite thing to do is give the courtesy "ha." or acknowledge that they have spoken in a nice way.  You chose instead to cut him short by acting as if you thought he was serious when you acknowledge here you knew he wasn't.  He then tried to continue the joke and again you cut him short.  It is fine to not think someone is funny and choose not to laugh, but I don't think you were very kind here. 

JennJenn68

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #7 on: February 24, 2012, 12:10:06 PM »
I don't see your reaction as rude as all, DarkMagdelena.  His remark was offensive and one of those types of insensitive comments that, when called on it, the boor will say, in an injured tone, "Just kidding!  Can't you take a joke?"

I can't get my head around anybody thinking it's okay to make comments on someone's medication.  What would this person say if faced by a diabetic giving him/herself insulin?  "Wow, mainline much?"  Egad.

Deetee

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #8 on: February 24, 2012, 12:18:01 PM »
It sounded like a joke to me. You responded like someone who

a) didn't find the joke funny
b) did not want to interact with him at all. ever.

That's completely your call and your right. Obviously your sense of humours do not mesh. But you should be aware that interaction is sending off a huge "GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE" signal.

Now I wasn't there. You were. There are some people that you want to send that signal to and it can be completely appropriate and even required.

If it was me that made the (lame) joke, I know that I would never talk to you again if I could help because it would be obvious to me that you hated me.

Having made that joke, albeit with people I know, and had it made at me I would have completely gone with " Yup, I'll sell you these pills for $5000, cash only. I know they kinda look like Tylenol and taste like Tylenol and come in a a Tylenol bottle, but it's still a total bargain!"
« Last Edit: February 24, 2012, 12:40:31 PM by Deetee »

jmarvellous

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #9 on: February 24, 2012, 12:19:57 PM »
It was a bad joke because you didn't find it funny, but I don't think it was meant to be mean.

I'm pretty sure he won't try to joke (or talk) with you again, though, because your response sounds pretty good at shutting him down. It's hard to know how to break the ice with classmates sometimes, as I remember well from school. He has been taught that this is the wrong approach with you.

I carry lots of meds for various minor issues and would not use recreational drugs, and I found it kinda funny. Not LOL-worthy, but smile-worthy.

violinp

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #10 on: February 24, 2012, 12:35:47 PM »
If it was a joke, it was a poor attempt at one. I would never joke about someone being a drug dealer unless I knew the person very well. You were fine, Dark Magdalena.
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Reason

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #11 on: February 24, 2012, 12:50:40 PM »
I think he made an awkward, rude, and uncalled-for statement, but I think the interesting assumption was yours in thinking he actually meant to imply you were dealing drugs (even the prescription kind).

His statement might have been better met with silence and an eye roll.

Actually that may have been true if he didn't attempt to defend his nonsensical position with a follow up of "There's no way you need all those pills".

So it appears that the student did fully believe that Dark Magdalena was actually dealing drugs out of her back up. It's another matter wether or not he thought the statement is insulting, but as she found it so, the correct thing for him to do would have been to apologize right at that point.

Editeer

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #12 on: February 24, 2012, 02:13:36 PM »
I don't think the OP was rude at all. She was coolly polite.

The guy's first comment sounds like a clumsy attempt at a joke. However, after DM said "I need all of them," the guy should have shut up or apologized.  His comment "There's no way you need all of those" was overly personal and intrusive. He was putting her in a position where she either had to play along, or had  to justify or explain her medical needs. (I don't think he thought for a minute that she was really a drug dealer.)

Etiquette doesn't require us to be friendly or encouraging to people who say boorish things. And sometimes people need to learn from experience that some kinds of jokes really aren't appropriate, at least not with people you don't know well.

Mental Magpie

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #13 on: February 24, 2012, 02:24:43 PM »
I don't think the OP was rude at all. She was coolly polite.

The guy's first comment sounds like a clumsy attempt at a joke. However, after DM said "I need all of them," the guy should have shut up or apologized.  His comment "There's no way you need all of those" was overly personal and intrusive. He was putting her in a position where she either had to play along, or had  to justify or explain her medical needs. (I don't think he thought for a minute that she was really a drug dealer.)

Etiquette doesn't require us to be friendly or encouraging to people who say boorish things. And sometimes people need to learn from experience that some kinds of jokes really aren't appropriate, at least not with people you don't know well.

Thank you for explaining that because that's how I see it.  The first comment, okay, could have been a joke, so my "interesting assumption" was a "I'm not really sure how to respond to that...".  It stopped being a joke when he started defending his initial boorish comment. 

Also, I want to point out that accusing me of doing drugs in a stupid joke (per another thread about my necklace) and accusing me of being a drug dealer in a stupid joke are completely different things.  Misdemeanor or felony?  I also have a great sense of humor.  Had someone said something like, "Whoa, looks like pharmacy in there!" I probably would have laughed and tried to push the Ibuprofen on them (jokingly, of course).  Accusing me of engaging in felonious behavior during a Criminal Justice class is just stupid, IMHO, and probably why I didn't find it funny at all.  If I knew him better, was someone with whom I interacted, my response probably also would have been different.  As I said above, my initial "interesting assumption" comment was more because I didn't have anything else to say.  It was when he started defending himself that I felt it was not longer a joke and needed shut down.

As for it being heard getting to know people in class or joking around with a near stranger, that gives him no excuse to accuse of felonious behavior and I don't know why he would think that would be a good way to start off.  I'm not saying that's what anyone here is implying, it was just a thought I had in response to a few different comments.

Isn't the point of this phrase to shut someone down when they're being rude?  That's what I did and I don't think I did anything wrong at all.  If this was not a good time to use this phrase then I don't know when is.

The problem with choosing the lesser of two evils is that you're still choosing evil.

s

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Re: Used It In Class Today
« Reply #14 on: February 24, 2012, 03:09:19 PM »

I can't get my head around anybody thinking it's okay to make comments on someone's medication.

This precisely.  POD.