The Christmas Party Conundrum-Long (It's been simmering a while)

[doodlemor]

Congratulations on your dear grandbaby, crella!

Your update is great!  I'm so happy to hear that all is well with you.

[crella]

Thank you!

[weeblewobble]

Well, wasn't it nice for the chorus to let you host their Christmas party for them?    Seriously, these people are a bunch of clods. They treated your house like a catering hall.

I think you would be justified in skipping a year. If you still want to hold a Christmas event, change up the time and structure of the party.  A small dinner party at night or maybe a cocktail party. And keep the invitation list very very limited, as in, not including members of the chorus. 

If they ask about this year's party, I wouldn't see any problem in saying something like, "Last year's party got a bit out of hand, in terms of uninvited guests and some confusion as to who was hosting, so I won't be holding a neighborhood coffee this year."   They need to know their own actions are what led to the loss of this year's festivities.

[JoyinVirginia]

Crella, thanks for the update! Congrats on the grandbaby! Sorry your mother is not doing well and many sympathies on having to clean out the inlaws house.
Hope any future parties you have go well.

[lowspark]

If you do decide to have another party, I would send out actual invitations and write something like,
"I regret that I will not be able to accommodate additional guests beyond those I've directly invited."
or something like that.
I wouldn't write any reason or excuse such as space or previous year's party not working out because that opens it up to discussion (as in someone trying to convince you that they're just bringing one more person, surely that won't be too many! or some such).

And if anyone whipped out a zip lock bag and proceeded to fill it up at a party I was hosting before the party was even over.... and without even asking first! ... well, I'd have no qualms about saying, "Sorry, these are for the guests of the party, not for to-go packages." I have to say, the zip lock maneuver takes some real nerve!

[crella]

Yes, it does. I was flabbergasted.

[artk2002]

Yes, it does. I was flabbergasted.

There's a teacher at the boys' school who does this all. the. time. She goes to the grade level potluck and brings plastic containers. Everybody just writes it off as a quirk -- she's a drama teacher!