Pay me to play games..

[jedikaiti]

Why are you friends with this guy anyway?

That's what I'm wondering.

[Mr Wigglybones]

I can see why you need to ask what to say about this as I cannot think of a polite way of responding to this bozo. Why is anyone friends with this loser?

[Drawberry]

He is an old friend of many of my buddies. A few of them have known him since high school and college, they admit he definitely has his faults but can genuinely be enjoyable to be around as shocking as it may seem.

I have to admit, he is not the kind of guy everyone can really get along with.Buddy here can be a nice guy to chat with, to hang around with in a group and I have had pleasant enough time with him despite the first few 'bumps' when I first met him. (That is a whole story on its own..) Buddy is the kind of guy that you either take with a grain of salt, or will forever be offended and angered by. I think I am just the kind of person who grew up getting teased by siblings and peers enough that I grew a thick skin and can let most of his nonsense bounce off me. He really doesn't see that he can be offensive or his behavior is unusual and is very sensitive.

Trust me, everyone will admit that he has some pretty obvious issues. But he's just an old friend of many of my friends and can be a good enough guy. A lot of us have told him flat out to check his attitude at the door, and he's generally mellowed out quite a bit more. How I see him is as this perpetually child-like state where someone just didn't teach him manners.

All of us just really have to laugh about this fundraiser shenanigan, it's not so much any of us are offended by it so much as us all being mildly amused and just having to shrug our shoulders.

[missmolly]

despite the first few 'bumps' when I first met him. (That is a whole story on its own..)

Oooh, can you post that? Pretty please.

[strangetimes]

despite the first few 'bumps' when I first met him. (That is a whole story on its own..)

Oooh, can you post that? Pretty please.

I'd love to hear, too

[TheVapors]

Irk. What.

I think complete silence is the most brilliant of replies in this situation. Especially when everyone is silent.

What else can a person say to this sense of entitlement while still being polite?

I know I have a laundry list of things I could say, but I'd have to throw "being polite" out the window the second I open my mouth, so I don't blame anyone for not saying anything.

If he brought it up in person, I'd have to glue my hand over my mouth just to stop myself from scoffing or guffawing or some horrid combination of both.

At least your gang of friends has a sense of humor about his antics. This sounds like one incident that'll be remembered for a loooong time to come.

[BeagleMommy]

Sounds alot like the temp I had in a previous office.  She had a slew of temporary jobs and was convinced that she was the next great screenwriter even though she had not written a cotton picking thing.  She just couldn't understand why her father thought he had wasted his money sending her to college for journalism.  Couldn't he understand that as soon as she finished travelling all around the country to Stevie Nicks concerts she would move to Tuczon Arizona and become the next big thing?!    Those were her exact words.

[Drawberry]

Since you fine bucks and does want to hear the story, I shall tell it. Be warned it does involve some sexual innuendo that is pretty darn clear, so it might not be 'safe for work'. I'll post it in white text just to be super safe;

I had been out with Boyfriend and (his) our friends (Of whom I was quickly getting to know and becoming close with) when Buddy showed up at the end of things and we agreed to head to a deli in the town we where at so he could get some dinner. As most deli's do, this one included a pickle spear with sandwich purchases. In one hand I had a bottle of soda, in the other a basket of fries for Boyfriend and I to share. Buddy stated he absolutely hated pickles and offered it to me by holding it out. I said sure I'd take it if he didn't care for it, as I love pickles. As we where at the table and I was fumbling with all the junk I had with me Buddy held it right to me so I grabbed it with my teeth. Not thinking a single second thought about it. I am sure you know where this is going....

As soon as I sat down Buddy stated: "That's the hottest thing I've seen in three years"

Okay fine, silly. I didn't really mind too much, but it was certainly a little off color and not exactly appropriate to say to someone you have just met without knowing how comfortable they would be with sexual jokes.

After we all finished eating and got up to go, buddy noticed I hadn't finished eating the whole pickle. He looked at me and said "Drawberry I'd really appreciate it if you finished that pickle"

Again, this would have been silly if it where someone I knew well enough. Trust me I can stand a dirty joke. You know. With close friends or family who are all comfortable with it and everyone is close with each other. Buddy said this not even one hour after meeting me. I had said less then a dozen things to him at this point, if it where anyone other then myself I could easily see that woman becoming understandably ruffled with Buddy.

This story is well known with our friends (but not known to Buddy as being a widely known 'incident') and the phrase "That's the hottest thing I've seen in three years" has become a running punchline with a few of us. It's just too funny not to remember.

[MacadamiaNut]

I think it's so funny that he said *precisely* three years.  That's an odd way of saying it and I can see how that can become a running inside joke.  I wasn't even there and I'm laughing!

[SamiHami]

He is an old friend of many of my buddies. A few of them have known him since high school and college, they admit he definitely has his faults but can genuinely be enjoyable to be around as shocking as it may seem.

I have to admit, he is not the kind of guy everyone can really get along with.Buddy here can be a nice guy to chat with, to hang around with in a group and I have had pleasant enough time with him despite the first few 'bumps' when I first met him. (That is a whole story on its own..) Buddy is the kind of guy that you either take with a grain of salt, or will forever be offended and angered by. I think I am just the kind of person who grew up getting teased by siblings and peers enough that I grew a thick skin and can let most of his nonsense bounce off me. He really doesn't see that he can be offensive or his behavior is unusual and is very sensitive.
Trust me, everyone will admit that he has some pretty obvious issues. But he's just an old friend of many of my friends and can be a good enough guy. A lot of us have told him flat out to check his attitude at the door, and he's generally mellowed out quite a bit more. How I see him is as this perpetually child-like state where someone just didn't teach him manners.

All of us just really have to laugh about this fundraiser shenanigan, it's not so much any of us are offended by it so much as us all being mildly amused and just having to shrug our shoulders.

I beg to differ. People misuse the notion of being sensitive. In reality what he is is self centered. Sensitive people are concerned about the feelings and comfort of those around them. Self centered people care about their feelings only. From what you have described, he is anything but sensitive.

[artk2002]

I beg to differ. People misuse the notion of being sensitive. In reality what he is is self centered. Sensitive people are concerned about the feelings and comfort of those around them. Self centered people care about their feelings only. From what you have described, he is anything but sensitive.

"Touchy" is probably a better word!

[Softly Spoken]

It took me a bit to respond to this one because I had an absolutely wretched time picking my jaw up off of my keyboard.

The how-you-met-Buddy 'incident' you described brings to mind the classic saying about first impressions. It also makes me want to do something to Buddy with said pickle that the filters would not let me describe.

As for his pathetic begging, *ahem* I mean "fundraiser," what complete Ferdinand pucky. Absolutely deserving of complete silence.

I have a brother like this who somehow developed the most unbelievable sense of entitlement I have ever seen. He expects the world to conform to his reality. He expects to be bailed out of every mistake he makes. He expects to get everything he wants with no effort whatsoever. He expects all his friends and family to help him out of the hole he dug himself, because that's what he wants and deserves. He would never even bother with the video games he would just expect people to straight give him the money simply because he wants it.

How do people get like this and how can you make them go away?

[greencat]

Oooh!  I, from experience with moochers, can tell you exactly why he set the date so far in advance.

He said he wants this money to pay for photography classes.  Most universities (in the USA at least, not sure of the typical academic calendar elsewhere) start classes around the end of August and have a payment deadline in the first week of September.  Ergo, he is trying to make sure that he gets the money right around the time he needs to spend it. 

[Drawberry]

I am glad everyone else was amused with that little tale as I and Boyfriend are When I said sensitive it was more in referencing his own feelings, not the feelings of others. Selfishly sensitive perhaps? And just a touch oblivious. 

A fairly good example of what I mean is this;
One year a friend was having a Halloween party, Buddy had been trying to 'court' a woman with not much success at getting out of 'kinda a friend' zone. He had invited her to come with him to the party, which she said she may not be able to attend. This woman did not know ANY of the other's who would be going, and it was purely Buddy wanting to be with her, her response was not inappropriate and everyone had agreed she was welcome to come if she wanted but no one would fault her for not being able to come. Buddy calls her up that night. And calls her. And calls her. And calls her. Reports say around 6 or so times in that evening, leaving her messages all asking if she was going to make it. Not surprisingly she did not show up. Also not surprisingly Buddy absolutely could not understand why this girl found his behavior incredibly creepy. Some of the girls in the 'group' tried to explain why that kind of thing is really not appropriate and could be unnerving, but he refused to accept that and was adamant he didn't do anything wrong and that it was just the whole world was against him.

[TheVapors]

I get that sometimes the world doesn't see things the way they are in our minds. Intentions aren't always the easiest to get across... but every woman at a party was trying to gently tell him how his actions might be interpreted, that's a pretty clear sign that he should've chosen to reflect on what he was doing. Even if he didn't heed their advice in the end, at least consider it.

I mean, had I been that girl... and been called upwards of 6 times in one night for something non-urgent like a party... I'd probably be thinking "What is wrong with this guy? I know one thing for sure, I won't be dating him."