BG/ DH's brother got married several years ago to a woman with 3 daughters. SIL is of the opinion that no one is going to tell her how to raise her children because the school enforced a dress code violation on the oldest child when she was in 1st grade. Therefore, the oldest was pulled out of school and the other 2 have never set foot in a school. Now, at the ages of 19, 17, and 15, those girls can barely read and write, are allowed to smoke, drink alcohol and are sexually active. SIL encourages their behavior. DH is fully aware for my dislike of this woman and her daughters and that I want nothing to do with them. For the most part, I have sucked it up and put on my game face for all family gatherings. Now, I'm not so sure./End BG
A couple of weeks ago we received an invitation in the mail for the "bagging and tagging" of the oldest niece. Yes, those exact words were used on the wedding invitation. The invitation also included the note that BIL and SIL will be cooking the meat on the grill for the reception but that all guests are asked to bring a side dish and a chair to sit on along with their gift. DH and I have been arguing about whether or not we are going but then he dropped another bomb on me last night. It seems that the youngest girl (age 15) is pregnant and is going to make the announcement at the wedding. Since she wants to tell everybody herself, the entire family has been Instructed to pretend that we don't know and act surprised and really excited for her.
I can't do it. I just can't be excited about a 15 year old with absolutely no education and no job having a baby on purpose because she wanted one without any thought as to how she was going to take care of this baby when she can't even take care of herself. She doesn't live with BIL and SIL, she crashes on the couch of whatever friend lets her that day and bums food & cigarettes from them (or steals what she needs) until she outstays her welcome then moves on. I know I sound harsh but that is what she does and is proud that it doesn't cost her anything to live from day to day.
So, not only do I have to decide if we are going to drive 2 hours, give a gift and food for one girl's wedding but we also have to show excitement for the pregnancy of the other. And I have to pretend to my children that her behavior and the way she lives is OK!! How do I do this?