General Etiquette > Techno-quette

Invited to a benefit on facebook

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immadz:

--- Quote from: Mikayla on April 04, 2012, 04:15:24 PM ---I land in the middle.  If the benefit is being organized to enable the acquaintance to travel to Santiago, then I'd find it offputting.  I guess people draw the line in different places, but I'm not in favor of *any* broad fundraising that benefits only the person sponsoring it. 

The type of thing that would not bother me would be if the charity event was for the purpose of raising funds and awareness related to the disease that caused her disability, and these funds went to the non-profit organization dedicated to it. 

PS - I used the word offputting instead of rude, because I can't quite call this rude. It's just a FB notification, which you can delete or ignore.  But I would have reacted the same way.   

--- End quote ---

It seems like this would be a once in a lifetime opportunity to be involved in further study and research. Sounds like that if this person were not disabled, they would probably be able to make it. I wouldn't find it off-putting, though I would probably not attend either. I have to pick and choose what and to whom I give.

hobish:

Is it really for theater research, or were you obscuring?

O'Dell:
It is a massive opporunity and will take her to new heights in her career.

It's illogical of me, but for some reason this bothers me. If it's such a great opportunity, why isn't she the one investing the money in it? Why expect others to do it? Maybe part of what bothers me is there isn't much talking up of the benefit itself and what those attending will get out of it. It just feels one-sided and more like asking for donations somehow. I suspect I'd feel differently if the majority of the message had been about the benefit and how there would be great food/booze/entertainment there with just a short blurb about the person and why the benefit is held. She seems to be playing the sympathy card with all the info about why she needs the money.

Surianne:
I don't have a problem with this at all.  I get invited to fundraisers/benefits all the time on Facebook and it's never occurred to me that it would be rude.  I attend the ones I want to support or where I'd find the event interesting, and I ignore/decline the ones I'd prefer not to attend. 

Nellop:

--- Quote from: hobish on April 06, 2012, 01:18:18 PM ---
Is it really for theater research, or were you obscuring?

--- End quote ---

It is actually for theatre research.

I think it bothered me because if it was me, or the majority of people I know - we would fund our own travel etc
I know that it would cost more because of her care, but I don't think that it's something that others should fund.

There are many courses and opportunities that would really help my career, but that I can't go on because I don't have the money. I wouldn't expect others to fund it for me.

From what I gather, the benefit is a band playing - with some juice and nibbles provided by a society she belongs to - followed by a presentation on what she would be doing in Chile.

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