Taking time off work for medical reasons and a coworker complaining. Update 106!

[ebrochu]

I am so unbelievably sad and angry right now.

With 3 weeks to go, having done everything they asked of me, waiting forever in pain and discomfort and swelling, Being the best patient I can be, they cancelled my surgery.

I saw the anesthesiologist, and She examined me, and pronounced me incredibly healthy, and saw no real issue with putting me under. The only issue she saw was my weight, and that "you're working on that, so everything else is awesome!"

She then told me that she needed to confer with my gyno, and they would let me know from there what was going on. That was a week and a half ago.

I got a call this morning, letting me know that the "anesthesiologist has declined to do the surgery, and therefore we will not be operating on you here. We have called your G.P to inform them, your treatment is in his hands now." No possibility of appeal, no changing their minds. It is a smaller hospital, but they do perform surgeries there. I guess I'm just that much too fat for them to want to operate on me. I personally think the surgeon didn't want to do the operation, since my anesthetist was happy with my health and prospects. But if that was the case, if she was feeling at all hesitant about operating, why not tell me that from the beginning, and refer me then? Even after the cat scan, at the end of May? Why wait till 3 weeks before the surgery? Why get my hopes up?

After all this waiting, all these tests, all this pain, I now have to start all over again. I have to find a gyno again. Go through all the exams again. Tests again. Waiting again.

If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go off and cry. Again

[Bethalize]

Hugs.

[Winterlight]

*hugs* I'm sorry. That really sucks.

[MyFamily]

Oh, no, that is awful.  I hope you find someone to do the surgery asap.

[MrsVandy]

Thats terrible! Very gentle hugs. Hopefully your GP will be able to find you a new team to get you speedy help. Good luck with everything!

[Kiara]

I'm furious on your behalf.  Call the gyno and ask specifically what the anesthesiologist said to turn you down.  And say "Because I'm confused...she told me there was no problem, so what changed in a week?"  It's your health, you have a right to know. 

And big *HUGS*.

[Petticoats]

That's terrible! And obviously they haven't read the studies about how people who are carrying some extra weight recover *better* from surgery.

I'm so, so sorry.

And yeah, what Kiara said!

[Gyburc]

I'm so sorry! ((((Hugs and more hugs))))

I agree with Kiara - do follow this up. This really is inexcusable.

I'll be thinking of you,

G

[gramma dishes]

I'm yet another one seconding what Kiara said.  To tell you everything was fine and then to just arbitrarily abruptly change her mind is inexcusable.  You deserve some straight answers.

[ebrochu]

there's no real update per se. my G.P. is putting out a rush to all the neighbouring hospitals in the next town over (larger town) and he's working furiously with my Short Term Disability co-ordinator to have my benefits extended yet again.

More importantly, he was (1.)  very apologetic towards me, telling me that he was so very sorry that I was going through this, giving me the apology I wanted.
(2.)  Very pissed off at this gyno.  A doc he's worked with in the past. He feels almost as let down as I do. Almost.

I have begun the process of getting the answers I need and deserve from the original gyno. I've typed up both a letter to her and the hospital administrators / human resources / head of personnel outlining the way I was treated, and how I feel. I need to research the people involved before sending anything off.

I'm not currently able to go speak to her face to face just yet, because if I was to see her, I'm not sure I could contain my temper, and my getting lead away by security wouldn't be beneficial. Writing out the letter to her though was rather cathartic.

I have at least an awesome G.P. who is working his butt off to help me. That's something. I just wish she had told me from the beginning that there was ANY issue or reservation about operating on me, so I could have found someone else in April, and potentially be DONE already!

[peach2play]

Do you have a patient advocate you can speak to?  I think every hospital has one.

[rashea]

Sounds like they may have tried to pawn their issues off on someone else. I get why they might hesitate, but be honest about that fact. It's possible that the anesthesiologist wasn't honest with you to your face. It's also possible that the hospital balked. Or that the anesthesiologist thought the surgery was further off and you'd have more time to work on your weight.

You may want to check and see if you can find someone associated with a bigger hospital. That way you're more likely to have people willing to take the risk, because they'll have the experience and equipment to do it right.

If you need a happy thought to get you through, at least if they weren't confident in their own abilities, they didn't operate on you. Would you really want someone who had concerns about their skill in getting your safely through operating?

[gramma dishes]

...    at least if they weren't confident in their own abilities, they didn't operate on you. Would you really want someone who had concerns about their skill in getting your safely through operating?

Rashea makes a very good point!

[kkl123]

I'd be concerned about a medical records mistake, given the anaesthesiologist said no after earlier basically saying yes.

Can you ask your GP to review the records from the anaesthesiologist and the ob/gyn to see if there is something anomalous?  This is the sort of thing you want to get corrected if there is a records problem for a number of reasons -- insurance/pre-existing conditions, getting the surgery now if it is safe, and someone basing further medical treatment on bad data.

[ebrochu]

There was no mix up with patient info, unfortunately. I was sitting close enough to the anesthetist that I could see my paperwork, and every page had my full name at the top. The folder had my name on it. And she even asked me to outline my surgery needs to her as well, so she could make sure it lined up with what she had in front of her. and double checked the date. Not saying it in a negative way, so no offense meant, but I've been incredibly thorough through all of this. Giving them every piece of info that matters, I thought mattered, and even stuff that was very loosely connected, just so they were helped along as much as possible.

There are a few people I can appeal to, but like it's been said here, I wouldn't want her operating on me now, anyways. The most it can do is try and keep someone else like me from being treated so poorly. Although monetary compensation would be appreciated, since I've been on short term disability through work, and while I've been OK, the fact that I have to now do all of this over again with no warning to the fact will be rather difficult to get through. But somehow I think that won't be forth coming.

Also the hospital is small enough that there isn't really someone who "approves all the surgeries" above the surgeons themselves. They make their decisions, the anesthetist makes theirs, and they operate, or not.