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A Dearth of Thank You Notes: From the archives ThankYouNotes0223-07

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jmarvellous:

--- Quote from: Winterlight on April 26, 2012, 12:00:08 PM ---
--- Quote from: Perfect Circle on April 15, 2012, 05:55:59 AM ---I have no idea what the bag of goodies a bride should receive from the MOH is. No clue.
--- End quote ---

I was wondering the same thing.

--- End quote ---

Me either.

Also, the bridesmaid's thank-you AND gift were perfectly acceptable in place of a mailed thank-you card!

I disagree that the letter writer had any right to ASK her brother WHY she didn't get a thank-you note. That's inappropriate even if she gave a $300 gift. You just let it lie.

MellowedOne:
Personally, I think the expectation of 'thank you's' has evolved into a relationship-straining experience.

Sure it's nice to get acknowledgement from the recipient that our time/effort/expense was appreciated.  But to get angry because we didn't get thanked?  Whether we realize it or not, doing so gives the impression that our generosity must acknowledged to be deserved.  The sincerity of giving from the heart is tainted by contingency.

I have to admit, from personal experience I get a bit irked when I don't receive any kind of acknowledgement for a gift..and to me verbal is just as good as written.  But it's a temporary, fleeting thought, dismissed as something of no consequence - it won't even hinder me from giving to that person again in the future.   To me the only real abuse of hospitality is when the recipient expects it of me.  That's an entirely different story.

Mental Magpie:

--- Quote from: MellowedOne on May 02, 2012, 07:04:02 AM ---Personally, I think the expectation of 'thank you's' has evolved into a relationship-straining experience.

Sure it's nice to get acknowledgement from the recipient that our time/effort/expense was appreciated.  But to get angry because we didn't get thanked?  Whether we realize it or not, doing so gives the impression that our generosity must acknowledged to be deserved.  The sincerity of giving from the heart is tainted by contingency.

I have to admit, from personal experience I get a bit irked when I don't receive any kind of acknowledgement for a gift..and to me verbal is just as good as written.  But it's a temporary, fleeting thought, dismissed as something of no consequence - it won't even hinder me from giving to that person again in the future.   To me the only real abuse of hospitality is when the recipient expects it of me.  That's an entirely different story.

--- End quote ---

I agree that verbal is just as good as written...I actually prefer verbal because I get to actually hear the thanks/joy.  If I don't get thanked once by someone, it is fleeting, but I don't forget it.  When it becomes a pattern is when I stop giving as freely.

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