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A Dearth of Thank You Notes: From the archives ThankYouNotes0223-07

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--- Quote from: Perfect Circle on April 15, 2012, 04:55:59 AM ---I have no idea what the bag of goodies a bride should receive from the MOH is. No clue.

If the LW gave a present she absolutely should have received a thank you note.

--- End quote ---

I'm going to assume by the writing style that the OP's first language is not English, so there may be cultural factors at play.

Mental Magpie:

--- Quote from: Otterpop on April 14, 2012, 08:15:17 PM ---That's what I thought too.  Thank you notes were for gifts, not attending.  However, if someone contributed to the wedding, made something etc., they should receive a thank you.

--- End quote ---

This.  It's not just that the LW didn't give a tangible gift, her gift was how much time and effort she put into the dingdangity thing!  That in itself deserves a thank you card.


--- Quote from: Hollanda on April 14, 2012, 10:15:48 AM ---On the day of the wedding I gave only a card. We did receive wedding party gifts after dinner along with a cute and very thoughtful card. However, I guess I assumed that after the wedding all who attended were to be sent thanks again. They sent only thank you cards to people who gave at the wedding. I had asked a few others if they had received their card as I thought possible my honesty of not wanting or being able to spend the amount of money for limos and all had offended her after all. Not ONE of my family had received thank you cards. I finally got up the nerve to ask my brother about it and the holy wars started. She told him that he agreed they would send only to the ones who had given... and none of my family had. Now I was pissed!! My mother-in-law was invited and attended and I know she gives nicely! I know my sister gave! I gave a card & the gifts the maid of honor should have, purchased flowers to use at wedding made arrangements that she loved then was told they were too expensive and they went out and paid a florist to make arrangements using photos of what I made! Mine were cost @ approx. $5 for two.

--- End quote ---

The LW received a thank you note for her services as bridesmaid, her beef is that she and her family didn't receive a TY note for attending.  As others have mentioned, it's not necessary.

I don't know, there's just something about this one that bugs me a little.  But, like KarenK said, I also get the sense that English isn't the LW's first language so it's very possible that there's some cultural etiquette transgression here.

In my experience, TYs are sent for physical gifts, monetary gifts or gifts in the sense of time and effort.  Since this applied to everyone who attended our Wedding, the question was moot. 

Because many of our Wedding gifts arrived before the actual Wedding, people often received their TYs before they attended.


--- Quote from: Perfect Circle on April 15, 2012, 04:55:59 AM ---I have no idea what the bag of goodies a bride should receive from the MOH is. No clue.
--- End quote ---

I was wondering the same thing.


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