Aunt cursed me out in front of my coworkers! Update p. 39

[hobish]

This thread has always stuck in my head a little bit, i think because it seemed like you were trying to do a really nice thing helping your aunt out and yelling at you at work was just so crazy. It sounded, too, like something my siblings family (they are married to siblings) would do so maybe that is why it stuck with me. I can just see it happening in my head. I hope that doesn't sound stalkerishly odd     I am glad things have smoothed over; i think you handled it very gracefully. It will be nice not to have the bad feelings hanging around, i bet.

[katiescarlett]

This thread has always stuck in my head a little bit, i think because it seemed like you were trying to do a really nice thing helping your aunt out and yelling at you at work was just so crazy. It sounded, too, like something my siblings family (they are married to siblings) would do so maybe that is why it stuck with me. I can just see it happening in my head. I hope that doesn't sound stalkerishly odd     I am glad things have smoothed over; i think you handled it very gracefully. It will be nice not to have the bad feelings hanging around, i bet.

Not stalkerish at all!  And thank you!  You are right, it definitely makes it better.  I will have to interact with her at my work, and at family events, and it is nice not to be getting dirty looks anymore, or mean comments from her.  In fact, she called my work yesterday and I was the one that answered the phone.  Thankfully she was very nice to me. 

It's sad to say, but I don't trust her.  So, while I am glad we can get along again, I don't have any desire to resume the old relationship with her.  We always went to the movies together, or went to the city shopping, or I would stay at her house and we would watch movies, and we exchanged books all the time.  She doesn't have alot of friends to run around with, and I was that for her. 

Thank you everyone!

[onyonryngs]

I hate to say it, but I've had experience with the "forget it ever happened" resolution to family issues and it usually doesn't end up well for the person who was wronged in the first place.  You're the nice, you may forget, but she probably hasn't.  They tend to believe that they won or that they were the one to be the bigger person even though you're the one who deserved the apology.  It may go well for awhile, but keep your guard up.   

[katiescarlett]

Oh, believe me, I know.  I don't trust her at all.  As long as we are civil at family events, that is all that matters to me.  I won't be around her much other than that, or when she comes by my work to get her meds.  I can avoid her pretty easily there, if need be. 

Hopefully, it won't come to that.  But you never know.

[JenJay]

make my brownies gluten-free, please.

You did nothing wrong. Your aunt is a SS for thinking it's okay to ask you to risk your job for her convenience. You extended the olive branch and she broke it in half. I'd say it's up to her to apologize to you before your relationship can be restored.

As for family gatherings, I would be cordial but distant.

I agree. The only thing you did "wrong" was continue trying to appease her after she was nasty to you.

There's a thread here on the boards about giving passive-aggressive people what they want. What your aunt really wants is for you to grovel and beg forgiveness. Well, too bad for her, because what she said she wants is for you never to contact her again. As a member of this etiquette board I feel I must encourage you to respect her stated wish and not contact her again. If she approaches you with a heartfelt apology that'd be one thing, but until then... silence.

[Dalek]

I'm happy Aunt is being civil to you now. I hope she stays that way for you and your coworkers sake.