I don't talk to boyfriends

[Lynn2000]

Yeah, huh, having read the OP my mind kind of went to "stunned silence" as well. The next thing that comes to mind is that the guy sounds like a bitter jerk who resents other people being in any kind of romantic relationship and tries to poison or belittle them. I don't know, of course, but that's the impression I got. If that's how he's going to treat a total stranger he's just met, I wouldn't feel any need to interact with him ever again.

I was imagining that the person who pointed out that Marty hadn't introduced himself to BF said something more like, "Hey, Marty, have you met Riversong's BF yet?" As opposed to, "Marty, you rude boor, introduce yourself to this young man like a proper gentleman." So I wasn't imagining that person as being rude. Although, now I'm wondering if Introducer knew how Marty was likely to react...

[RiverSong]

I was imagining that the person who pointed out that Marty hadn't introduced himself to BF said something more like, "Hey, Marty, have you met Riversong's BF yet?" As opposed to, "Marty, you rude boor, introduce yourself to this young man like a proper gentleman." So I wasn't imagining that person as being rude. Although, now I'm wondering if Introducer knew how Marty was likely to react...

Kind of a "I wanna see what plays out" kind of egging on. I never even thought of it that way.

[Lynn2000]

I was imagining that the person who pointed out that Marty hadn't introduced himself to BF said something more like, "Hey, Marty, have you met Riversong's BF yet?" As opposed to, "Marty, you rude boor, introduce yourself to this young man like a proper gentleman." So I wasn't imagining that person as being rude. Although, now I'm wondering if Introducer knew how Marty was likely to react...

Kind of a "I wanna see what plays out" kind of egging on. I never even thought of it that way.

Well, I didn't mean to cast aspersions on someone in the story we had almost no details about! But a couple people suggested Introducer was rude for pointing out that Marty hadn't spoken to BF yet, and I just hadn't read the story that way. Only you know for sure, OP!

[RiverSong]

I was imagining that the person who pointed out that Marty hadn't introduced himself to BF said something more like, "Hey, Marty, have you met Riversong's BF yet?" As opposed to, "Marty, you rude boor, introduce yourself to this young man like a proper gentleman." So I wasn't imagining that person as being rude. Although, now I'm wondering if Introducer knew how Marty was likely to react...

Kind of a "I wanna see what plays out" kind of egging on. I never even thought of it that way.

I honestly don't know them well enough to know.


Well, I didn't mean to cast aspersions on someone in the story we had almost no details about! But a couple people suggested Introducer was rude for pointing out that Marty hadn't spoken to BF yet, and I just hadn't read the story that way. Only you know for sure, OP!

[gramma dishes]

Marty:  "I don't talk to boyfriends."

You:  "Oh.  That's so sad." 

Because really it is. 

[Bees]

Tell him you only expect the common courtesy  someone should extend to a visitor in your church. 

He was fishing for more information then he is entitled to about your relationship, and wants to cause you embarrassment.

[TootsNYC]

So...boyfriends aren't real people, worthy of conversation on their own, until they get married?

Even then, they're not worthy--not even on the walk down the aisle!!!

Tell him you only expect the common courtesy  someone should extend to a visitor in your church. 

He was fishing for more information then he is entitled to about your relationship, and wants to cause you embarrassment.

That would be a nice response, if you could think of it.

[chicajojobe]

Are you sure he doesn't have dementia maybe?

What he said makes absolutely zero sense to me! It doesn't even make sense if he were to consider a relationship only real if marriage were involved, because if that were the case why would he try to talk the nieces he walked down the isle out of it?
Plus, if he's in his 60s it would be completely normal when he was younger for unmarried people to date and call the person they're dating "boyfriend/girlfriend" heck it might have even been going temporarily out of fashion since he would have been coming of age in the 60s!

I think the idea of hinting to your father to maybe make common courtesy the theme of next week's sermon is a good one. It might go over the head of this particular (not!) gentleman, but I still like the idea.

[Winterlight]

Well, my first reaction was, "Goody for you." Probably not Miss Manners approved.