Bridal Showers? (UK)

[Saffy]

Baby showers are doing the 'creep' in NZ also - I hate it because people don't understand the etiquette that goes hand in hand with it in the US, and throw them for themselves. I am far from pregnant and I've already firmly told DH I will NOT be having one! A 'welcome to the world, baby' BBQ perhaps, some weeks (months?) after the birth.

Bridal showers...no. Usually the bride doesn't pay anything for the hen's do. I ended up buying the food (not expensive!) the day before for mine, as the organizing friend had a nasty freak accident, but that didn't worry me at all - my girls planned an amazing day out on a yacht, with Champagne and delicious food - it was absolutely perfect, with the exception of friend's nasty accident! I wore a sash and a veil, provided by amazing organizing friend. 

[scotcat60]

In the UK we don't generally do Bridal showers, but I read in the paper this week that "reveal the sex of your baby  when you cut into a cake to see if the icing is pink or blue" parties have been held, and are on the up, and for very high prices. Personally, I'd rather spend the money on stuff for the baby, but to each his own.

[jaxsue]

I'm American born-and-raised, but I really, really envy the UKers (is that even a word?); I really detest the evolution of showers/celebrations in the US. Not saying that every celebration is OTT, but more and more it's that way. Maybe it's because I was raised by Canadians who were Anglo-philes - that might color my POV. In fact, I'm sure it colors my POV. The culture in which I was raised discouraged being showy and attention-seeking. YMMV.

When I was in N. Ireland my host was invited to a birthday party at a pub. I was not sure if it was polite for me to go, and without a gift. As PPs here have said, no gift, no problem. I went and it was so much fun. It was about 50 people at the pub, lots of shandies, and lots of fun. So much better than your average "look at me!!" American birthday party.

FTR, there is good and bad in every culture. There are just times when I feel like a fish out of water, even though I was born here.

[Sharnita]

You might just be hanging out with the wrong Americans because what you describe is pretty much my expereince for adult birthdays in America. 

[jaxsue]

You might just be hanging out with the wrong Americans because what you describe is pretty much my expereince for adult birthdays in America.

You have a point. In my "new" (as in NJ/NY) friends it's more the UK way. Where I lived before it was more of the gift-grab thing.

[Margo]

Going back a post or two - I don't think what Tilt Fairy describes re: stag & hen nights in the UK  is the norm - there are certianly lots of people who do have expensive and extended holidays, but I wouldn't say it's the majority.

I'm at an age where a LOT of my friends have been getting married over the past 10 years, and I can't think of a single couple who have had anything like that. Mostly it's been more low key; a spa day, meal out, on one ocassion a weekend in a rented cottage with lots of nice food & wine. I don't know anyone who had limos or matching outfits or anything like that.

Of course, a lot depends on your friends and their tastes, and equally, groups dressed up with L-plates & tiaras etc are very visible, so perhaps make it seem more common than it is.

My sister is getting married this summer - her hen do involves a group of us having a spa-weekend - we have booked a deal that gives us B&B & evening meal at a spa hotel, with full access to the sap and one treatment each. Including travel, it will work out at about £130 each plus whatever anyone choses to spend on extra spa treatments, and the cost of lunch which isn't included in the pacakge. Most of the hen parties I have been to have involved a single evening out, usually nice meal followed by a club.

I's really gald we don't do showers  - having a party specifically aimed at gift giving seems really uncomfortable to me..