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Age Etiquette

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snowdragon:

--- Quote from: Onyx_TKD on January 17, 2013, 03:57:30 PM ---
--- Quote from: TylerBelle on January 17, 2013, 02:11:16 PM ---If you are in a grouped together with people where most are of similar age, and one or two may be a generation (or two) older, unless by request, don't separate them by referring to them with a parental name (ie., Mom, Dad, Granddad, Grandma). And it can be vice versa, if there are few younger folks in the group (with names like youngster, etc.). Overall I'd imagine most in general would want to be just one of the group, regardless of any age difference. :)

Being a parent is about the best thing in the world, but in the terms I'm referring to can have the connotation of the similar age people clique together with the older person almost like a chaperone.

--- End quote ---

I'm not really sure what you're trying to describe here. Are you talking about calling an unrelated man "Dad" just because he's a generation older than most of the group, or are you saying that someone shouldn't call their parents "Mom" and "Dad" when most of the group is of the son/daughter's generation? In the former case, I don't think it has anything to do with the age composition of the group--I would say that calling someone other than your own parents or grandparents by (grand)parental names is inappropriate unless you know they want you to, period. In the latter case, I think it's very much an internal family matter--it's unreasonable to expect family to forgo familial titles unless it makes them more comfortable.

--- End quote ---

Actually there are people who would have a real problem with not being called proper generational title....be that parent, grandparent, aunt or uncle, no matter what the circumstances. My aunt does not stop being my aunt just because of the group we are in...and I don't stop being my nephew's aunt because his friends are around.

Mental Magpie:

--- Quote from: snowdragon on January 17, 2013, 04:34:15 PM ---
--- Quote from: Onyx_TKD on January 17, 2013, 03:57:30 PM ---
--- Quote from: TylerBelle on January 17, 2013, 02:11:16 PM ---If you are in a grouped together with people where most are of similar age, and one or two may be a generation (or two) older, unless by request, don't separate them by referring to them with a parental name (ie., Mom, Dad, Granddad, Grandma). And it can be vice versa, if there are few younger folks in the group (with names like youngster, etc.). Overall I'd imagine most in general would want to be just one of the group, regardless of any age difference. :)

Being a parent is about the best thing in the world, but in the terms I'm referring to can have the connotation of the similar age people clique together with the older person almost like a chaperone.

--- End quote ---

I'm not really sure what you're trying to describe here. Are you talking about calling an unrelated man "Dad" just because he's a generation older than most of the group, or are you saying that someone shouldn't call their parents "Mom" and "Dad" when most of the group is of the son/daughter's generation? In the former case, I don't think it has anything to do with the age composition of the group--I would say that calling someone other than your own parents or grandparents by (grand)parental names is inappropriate unless you know they want you to, period. In the latter case, I think it's very much an internal family matter--it's unreasonable to expect family to forgo familial titles unless it makes them more comfortable.

--- End quote ---

Actually there are people who would have a real problem with not being called proper generational title....be that parent, grandparent, aunt or uncle, no matter what the circumstances. My aunt does not stop being my aunt just because of the group we are in...and I don't stop being my nephew's aunt because his friends are around.

--- End quote ---

I get what TylerBelle is saying.  If there are say 6 25 year olds in a group of 8 where the other two are 40, don't, being that 40 year old, call the 25 year old a youngster to that person.

TylerBelle:
I really wasn't speaking of a group of related people. It's more like say a 60 year old woman has a certain interest and she joins a group about that interest, and nearly everyone else in the group is around thirty years younger than herself. She hopes to be seen as just one of the group, fitting in like everyone else. Though some members think of her as and say she's "like the mom of the group," and perhaps even give her the nickname of "Mom," solely due to the age difference. Being a mom is wonderful, but in this instance, it has the dynamic of the younger-aged people are cliquing together, while the older lady is made to feel like more as everyone's chaperone.

My point is if you find yourself put into a group (for school, activities, sports, etc.) of mostly your own age while there may be one or two a generation older or younger, treat everyone the same. Don't presume older people in the group are going want to be bossy, or nurturing, or only there to supervise, etc., and younger ones are needing to be bossed, or disciplined, etc.     

MrTango:
I just noticed that four points in the original post were directly addressing the volume of music.

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