Author Topic: Posting wedding photos online.  (Read 11859 times)

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Rohanna

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #60 on: May 28, 2012, 07:47:54 AM »
But if no one cares, why would someone post that many pictures of the day?

I think if they were mixed crowd pictures of the posters friends having fun at the reception it's one thing, but if it was a start to finish "coverage" of the event, it is rather "odd".
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Teenyweeny

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #61 on: May 28, 2012, 07:51:28 AM »
But if no one cares, why would someone post that many pictures of the day?

I think if they were mixed crowd pictures of the posters friends having fun at the reception it's one thing, but if it was a start to finish "coverage" of the event, it is rather "odd".

What I should have said is that nobody else care about your wedding in the way that you do.

For the guests, it's a day at which they had a nice time, and some people post lots of pictures. For very extensive wedding albums that I've seen, I'd say that very very few pictures are of the ceremony, or of particularly 'weddingy' things. Most are of the party, and of friends and family having fun and hanging out.




Oh Joy

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #62 on: May 28, 2012, 08:17:53 AM »
If I don't like a photo of myself, I untag it and move on.

I completely see where you're coming from, but tagging and untagging isn't relevant if the subject isn't on Facebook.

(General statements, not directed to Teenyweeny):
1) It seems when we talk about what 'should' be posted on social media, the difference between rights and courtesy often get blurred.  Of course, users can post just about anything they want, but the question is usually about what's considerate or comfortable for others...especially if the information or media is about their personal lives.
2) I don't see this issue as being entirely a BWW subject, but view it more in the context of any private event hosted by a friend or family member, whether it's an all-day formal event for 300 or a backyard barbecue for eight.  We aim to be thoughtful about how we act as guests...should I bring a gift  or contribution, what should I wear, shall I offer to help...this is - to me - just another category to understand that our hosts may have a preference (in one direction or the other) that we may wish to support.

ettiquit

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #63 on: May 28, 2012, 07:02:49 PM »
If I don't like a photo of myself, I untag it and move on.

I completely see where you're coming from, but tagging and untagging isn't relevant if the subject isn't on Facebook.

(General statements, not directed to Teenyweeny):
1) It seems when we talk about what 'should' be posted on social media, the difference between rights and courtesy often get blurred.  Of course, users can post just about anything they want, but the question is usually about what's considerate or comfortable for others...especially if the information or media is about their personal lives.
2) I don't see this issue as being entirely a BWW subject, but view it more in the context of any private event hosted by a friend or family member, whether it's an all-day formal event for 300 or a backyard barbecue for eight.  We aim to be thoughtful about how we act as guests...should I bring a gift  or contribution, what should I wear, shall I offer to help...this is - to me - just another category to understand that our hosts may have a preference (in one direction or the other) that we may wish to support.

POD

Can some random guest from my wedding post a really unflattering picture of me for all to see?  Of course they can!  Is it courteous?  Not at all.

I got married before social media (thank goodness!) and we did the disposable cameras on the tables thing so we could at least see some candid pictures before the professional ones came in.  I posted those, and then the professional proofs on my personal website, but I did make sure not to post anything potentially embarrassing or unflattering.

If I were the bride in this situation, I don't think I'd care too much if the pictures posted were of other guests, but I would be disappointed if there were any of me and the groom.  In the very least, send me the pics with me in them first and see if I'm ok with them being posted.  I don't think it's reasonable to expect NO pics be posted until the professional ones come in, but it would certainly be nice if only good pics were posted.

Actually, in my own wedding, one of my favorite pics of myself was taken by the husband of one of my bridesmaids while I was taking a break from the professional photos.  I had no idea he took it, but it turned out to be a great picture. 


lollylegs

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #64 on: May 28, 2012, 08:03:09 PM »
But if no one cares, why would someone post that many pictures of the day?

I think if they were mixed crowd pictures of the posters friends having fun at the reception it's one thing, but if it was a start to finish "coverage" of the event, it is rather "odd".

What I should have said is that nobody else care about your wedding in the way that you do.

For the guests, it's a day at which they had a nice time, and some people post lots of pictures. For very extensive wedding albums that I've seen, I'd say that very very few pictures are of the ceremony, or of particularly 'weddingy' things. Most are of the party, and of friends and family having fun and hanging out.

This right here is the crux of the issue for me. A few (a PP said half a dozen to a dozen, which I think is a good guideline) photos of the wedding says, "Here's me having fun at my friends wedding." But one hundred photos says something different. I'm not sure what, exactly, but something veering towards, "This is me unveiling the event," territory.

Of course users can do whatever they want with their FB, and with their photos, etc etc, but like others have said, it's a courtesy issue. Personally, I wouldn't post photos of someone's wedding before they posted their own, even if they were my bestie and I knew without a shadow of doubt that they wouldn't mind. Same goes for graduations, christenings, milestone birthdays, any milestone event really. That's my own personal stand and not one I expect everyone else to have, but like I said upthread, the situation presented in the OP would annoy me a little. I don't think I'd say anything to the photo poster, but I would keep it in mind for the future and be sure to express my wishes explicitly the next time I'm in a similar situation.

katycoo

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #65 on: May 28, 2012, 08:14:04 PM »
I think, as a courtesy to your friend, it would be prudent to remove photos from the internet, or her and her event.

I do think she's overreacting, but I also think one should have the right to choose how their image is used online.  And I don't think that happysnaps of a friends wedding as so important that your FB will wither and die without them.

This would make me shake my head at her, but its not a hill I'd die on.

Betelnut

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #66 on: May 29, 2012, 11:07:23 AM »
But if no one cares, why would someone post that many pictures of the day?

I think if they were mixed crowd pictures of the posters friends having fun at the reception it's one thing, but if it was a start to finish "coverage" of the event, it is rather "odd".

That's not what happened.  Read the OP.  The pictures were during the reception (not the wedding) and were mostly of her friends.  Candid shots, etc.  The reception is a party not a sacred ceremony.  It is a party.  Pictures will be taken.
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flowersintheattic

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #67 on: May 30, 2012, 06:06:28 PM »
I just got married this past weekend, and was ecstatic when my cousin posted photos on Facebook. She got quite a few of the event itself - exchange of rings, first kiss - and some great ones of our first dance. Neither DH nor I had a camera during the day, so we won't be able to post pictures until the professional pictures come in. I would have been disappointed if no one had posted pictures until that point.

I agree with what LadyL and a couple other posters said - posting pictures of the event (especially when they're candid shots of guests during the reception enjoying themselves) is a sign that everyone had a good time, and it seems a little ridiculous to try to keep people from posting pictures of themselves online just because the pictures were taken at an event you hosted.

For the specific situation here, though, I think the OP did the right thing in taking the pictures down, since it was requested. I would maybe re-post them after the professional pictures come out, and would definitely email some favorites to people who were in them.
...I learned my lesson / And yes, I still remember the last one / But this time will be different / Until I do it again... ~Phish, "Kill Devil Falls"

melbelle39

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Re: Posting wedding photos online.
« Reply #68 on: May 31, 2012, 12:25:48 AM »
My sister got married last year and our cousin (who has a habit of making things all about her) had posted 250 photos by 2am the next day.  Considering the reception went until well after midnight and the party was about 40 minutes drive away thats showing a bit of eagerness.

My sister was miffed for three reasons:

1.  Cousin had literally loaded up every single shot, including some unflattering ones of older family members.
2.  Cousin has over 2000 facebook "friends" including people sister went to school with and has no desire to be in touch with, absolutely no privacy settings on her facebook page, whereas my sister is very private - has only a few dozen FB friends and locks her profile down.
3.  The wedding photographer was Grooms father and he arranged a slideshow of about 50 images to be displayed later that day at the family and friends lunch - which had been mentioned in advance to those attending, including cousin.

I think posting that many images of someone elses event is unnecessary. I'm sure the OP meant no disrespect or damage and think she was very graceful in taking them down.  My view is somewhat tainted by Cousin.. who could probably take up a whole new thread..