General Etiquette > All In A Day's Work

Rude/Lewd comments from customer. What to do?

(1/12) > >>

SamiHami:
Brief BG: I help out part-time in a small gift shop/contract post office a couple of days a week. It is owned by a neighbor who runs the business end/paperwork while her daughter and I generally take care of the customers. I have not worked there very long, so I haven't encountered all of the "regulars" yet, but most of the ones I have met are very nice and I enjoy interacting with them.

Problem: The daughter, "Wren," confided to me today that there is a male customer that comes in occasionally and, without fail, makes lewd comments to her under the guise of "joking." She hates it and finds him to be completely creepy. She said that after this happening a few times she finally told him that she didn't like it and to stop. He got angry and said "That doesn't work for me! It's just a joke after all!" Since then Wren refuses to serve him and will go hide in the back room and has her mother wait on him so she won't have to. I do not know if he makes those comment to the mom (I will ask her next time I see her), but mom knows the situation and allows Wren to leave the counter when he is there. Mom is quite timid and I could easily see her just letting it slide instead of confronting him.

Wren told me this because she is certain that I will encounter him sooner or later and wanted me to be forewarned. If he does pull this nonsense with me, well, I am not so timid. Personally, I don't really care about idiotic comments, but the fact that he knows it upsets Wren yet still does it troubles me. It tells me that it is not a joke and that he is getting a charge out of bothering her.

I am trying to decide how to behave if/when the day comes that I have to wait on him. If he behaves, of course I will treat him like any other customer. However, if he makes rude/lewd comments to me under the guise of "joking," I am unsure of the best response. I hate the idea of just letting it go.

I've thought about doing the "How DARE you!" thing-loudly-and making a scene; after all, it is not rude to do so under the circumstance. It is perfectly appropriate to act/be shocked when a stranger makes such comments, after all.

Wise ones, how would you behave under the circumstances? The boss (mom) says she doesn't care if she loses his business so losing him as a customer is not a problem, but she won't go so far as to ban him outright (but if pushed enough, I think she would). My DH is very upset about this and wants us to call the police next time it happens (which would be easy to do since boss/mom's husband-Wren's dad-is a police officer) to put a stop to it. I think that might be OTT, but...I dunno.

Thoughts?

Dora:
I would tell him, "That is not an appropriate way to speak to me and I will not handle any transactions with you if it happens again". 
If he says it is just a joke. . . . "I find it inappropriate and will not subject myself to that kind of humor".

Some people enjoy banter and lewd humor, so I feel is is fair to give him one very clear message that you do not. 

Venus193:
If the guy gives off the creep vibe it's not banter.

My vote is for a very haughty "Excuse me?"  with one raised eyebrow.

LeveeWoman:
Give him one warning. If he has the gall to do it again, unload on him.

NyaChan:
Is there a reason why they haven't declined to serve him in the store altogether?  Maybe you could ask the mom if that is what she would prefer and inform him of that should he repeat that behavior.  It may just be that she was too timid to do it herself, but if you offered, she might be amenable.

Navigation

[0] Message Index

[#] Next page

Go to full version