Author Topic: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."  (Read 9016 times)

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TheVapors

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Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« on: June 04, 2012, 02:55:18 PM »
This is purely a curiosity question. I'm interested to see how other people feel about phrases like "I'm leaving this thread." Or "I won't be back in this thread."

I dabble across many forums, some of which get more heated than others. (Think political or religious type heated.) On some of these forums, it seems commonplace for one or more people to make their last reply end in "I'm out of this thread now" or some variation of that.

I suppose on one hand it can be seen as a "if other questions are posed to me, I won't be able to see them". However, on the other hand it feels unnecessary, and maybe even a way to get in the last word or sometimes one last dig. And they often seem to be posted out of anger.

I posted this in Technoquette, because it's about situations on forums. No one I know has ever left an IRL conversation by going, "I'm leaving this conversation now." So, maybe it's more pronounced purely because it is online. It comes across as a rather dramatic way to leave. As in: "I am leaving now! Notice how I'm leaving!"

For myself, if a thread is no longer fun, or if it annoys/upsets me in any way, I just close out the thread and go elsewhere without mentioning my leaving. I don't return, and therefore I don't even see any further replies, so in my world the thread has stopped existing. And I go about my happy life. The most I can ever remember saying in a thread when I'm about to leave is, "I can see that we're both on the opposite spectrum here, and while we agree about X, we'll never agree about Y."

However, since it's commonplace in some areas to state that they're bowing out of a thread, I'm wondering how others see such phrases.

How do you leave a thread? Are using phrases like "I'm out of here now" unnecessary? Are they rude? Or needlessly dramatic? Or maybe they're great phrases to use, and everyone should leave a thread that way? Or maybe some people see it as rude to not note leaving a thread?

Your thoughts? :)

Hijinks

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #1 on: June 04, 2012, 02:58:44 PM »
Probably needlessly dramatic.  I've been guilty of it several times myself.  I'm trying to be better :)  But at least I don't go back and read the responses after I flounce!  It takes will power, but I just avoid the topic until it falls off the main page.

AustenFan

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #2 on: June 04, 2012, 03:24:31 PM »
Whenever someone says it I mentally picture them moping along under a rain cloud while the Charlie Brown music plays. I think it's pretty juvenile, especially when they continue to argue their point then announce they are leaving the thread. 

That said, I have seen some more acceptable ways it can be done here, along the lines of "Thanks for the great advice! My question has been answered so I won't be updating the thread."

Judah

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #3 on: June 04, 2012, 03:36:46 PM »
There have been times when I'm in the middle of a conversation that is getting heated because either I'm misunderstanding the other poster or I'm being misunderstood and there isn't any point to continuing.  In these cases I think it's preferable to say, "We are obviously misunderstanding each other and this conversation has become pointless so, I'm bowing out." to just leaving the other poster hanging. 
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ettiquit

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #4 on: June 04, 2012, 03:56:52 PM »
I think people here tend to very politely state that they're leaving a thread, and it doesn't seem to be "drama-llama" to me.  Of course, if you are going to bother state that you're leaving, I'd definitely be doing an internal eye-roll if you come back to argue some more.

JenJay

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #5 on: June 04, 2012, 03:59:19 PM »
I think it's fine when it's the OP bowing out because their reason for posting has been addressed, the thread has taken on a life of its own, and the OP doesn't wish to continue. Phrased like "Thanks for the feedback. I probably won't return to the thread so if anyone has further advice please PM me." I've also seen it work when someone's opinion differs vastly from the majority and that starts derailing the initial point of the topic. Person might say "I can see we'll have to agree to disagree, and I'm going to bow out now." I don't take that as sour grapes but rather acknowledging nothing constructive is going to come from further conversation, so let's don't beat the dead horse.

The "Well I guess you all just think I'm WRONG so I won't bother coming back!" stuff makes me  ???  ::)

Bibliophile

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #6 on: June 04, 2012, 04:03:54 PM »
I tend to just bow out of the thread, but sometimes it takes me awhile before I actually feel it's been beaten to death.  I think writing it begs for someone to say, "No, please don't go!" 

I actually have used a form of this IRL though, rather than the hang-up with someone won't drop a subject.  Mainly it's just a "I'm not going to discuss this with you and if you continue to do so, I'm going to hang up the phone."

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Fidgets

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #7 on: June 04, 2012, 04:08:26 PM »
Most of my forum time is spent on tech/geek/gamer forums and the culture there about announcing your departure-in-a-snit is "different".  In general, if they're just leaving due to a disagreement or perceived mistreatment by other posters, I find it pretty silly.  I have a few "flounce" LOLcat type pictures that I post one of or I simply post, "Bye!".  In a gaming forum I belong to, the usual response from everyone is, "Bye!  Can I have your stuff since you won't need it anymore?" and the post is known as the flouncer's "Goodbye, cruel fora!" post.   I think the flouncers are hoping that the other posters will be exposed for how "mean" they were to the flouncer and/or are hoping to be begged to stay.  It's rather sad, really.

RingTailedLemur

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #8 on: June 04, 2012, 04:08:34 PM »
I've said it, rarely, but in a kind of, "I am not ignoring you, I won't be looking at this thread to see any posts addressed to me any more" way.

artk2002

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #9 on: June 04, 2012, 04:11:50 PM »
"Goodbye Cruel Forum" posts are rarely useful and often ridiculous. The really funny ones are the people who issue a GCF and then come back a little later. Me, I just stop posting/reading if I don't think a thread is useful.

A "we seem to be going around in circles about this topic, so perhaps we should let it rest/agree to disagree" is not a GCF.
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TheVapors

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #10 on: June 04, 2012, 04:18:39 PM »
I hadn't thought about the OP-angle. I agree. For those situations that it's useful to know the OP has found their answers and won't necessarily be back to update. It's a good way to let everyone know, and I don't consider that dramatic in any way. Merely informative.

Fidgets: I lol'd, because it's so very true on some sites I visit. I've always loved the "Can I have your stuff?" response. The other response I've seen is NOT eHell approved:  "Previous poster has a severe case of butthurt and must see a doctor immediately."

I should clarify about one thing: While I've always found the "Goodbye Cruel Forum" posts to be hilarious (and probably fun for a different topic), I was specifically wondering about leaving a thread, and not necessarily leaving the entire community forever.
« Last Edit: June 04, 2012, 04:22:16 PM by TheVapors »

Tilt Fairy

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #11 on: June 04, 2012, 04:20:21 PM »
I like them. I think they're exciting and dramatic and funny. The world needs more spice.

TootsNYC

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #12 on: June 04, 2012, 04:22:09 PM »
I like them. I think they're exciting and dramatic and funny. The world needs more spice.

LOL! That's one way of looking at it! And since I post on message boards/forums for entertainment, I think I agree with you.

Reason

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #13 on: June 04, 2012, 04:30:23 PM »
"I am leaving this thread" is not the same as "I am leaving this forum." The way I use it is if I accidentally derail a thread with a comment that side tracks the original discussion. In which case I usually apologize and bow out.

O'Dell

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #14 on: June 04, 2012, 04:35:18 PM »
I've said it, rarely, but in a kind of, "I am not ignoring you, I won't be looking at this thread to see any posts addressed to me any more" way.

This is how I've said it when I've used it on a forum. But I'll say something similar IRL when I'm talking to someone face to face.

And there are times when I appreciate someone saying they will leave a thread if I'm getting annoyed at 2 or 3 people getting carried away. It's a bit of a relief sometimes knowing that one of them is not coming back. The remaining debaters seem more likely to settle down if they know that the other won't  be coming back to respond to them.
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