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Author Topic: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."  (Read 19181 times)

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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #45 on: June 08, 2012, 02:58:26 PM »
I've done the agree to disagree thing one Friday when I got into a disagreement with someone and was about to leave. I didn't have net access at home and it seemed like we were going in circles, but I didn't want to end things on a flounce. They politely accepted it and that was the end.
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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #46 on: June 19, 2012, 02:25:37 PM »
I've done it once- on an NYC travel forum, another member pretty well raked me other the coals in a discussion over paying respects at the WTC site. That poster pretty well lambasted me, accusing me of some rather unsavory motives, even dragging in what her mother might allegedly say, if she was there. (Just an aside- when you're arguing with me, I don't care what your mom/SO/Whoever would have to say if only they were here- they're not here, so leave them out of it, I'm only interested in your opinion)
It was obvious that nothing I could say was going to change that person's mind, or even convince them that I wasn't some attention seeking nutjob (just for wanting to offer respects in a manner appropriate to my faith), so finally I said it. "We're not going to agree on this. Think what you want about me, I'm done defending myself to you." True to my word, I didn't revisit that thread, I was truly done with it. I wasn't looking for attention or sympathy, I wasn't hoping anyone would beg me to stay. It was simply not productive to continue that argument, and I didn't need the increased blood pressure.


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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #47 on: June 19, 2012, 08:29:03 PM »
I've said this before here and always thought it was the polite thing to do -- I thought it was best to let posters I was arguing with know I wasn't continuing the debate, so that they wouldn't spend energy on trying to convince me, and so that others would know I wouldn't be replying to future questions.  Until now I didn't know it was considered to be passive aggressive, so I'm glad this thread was started.  Definitely not the impression I intended to give!


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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #48 on: June 23, 2012, 10:52:42 PM »
I've seen lots of "I'm leaving this board" threads (not here, but . . .)

It’s overly dramatic and kind of a pathetic ploy for people to post long, sappy farewells or “please don’t go!” ::)  Usually people who play the “I’m leaving this board” card are upset at others and they want to make a big brouhaha with a grand exit.  Often they slink back in, and they get “Welcome back!  We missed you!”  ::)

I’ve never bought into all that.  If one wants to leave or has to leave due to lack of time, dwindling interests, etc. they should just go.  If they’ve made special friends they can PM or email.  But just go already.  Sheesh.

Whenever someone says it I mentally picture them moping along under a rain cloud while the Charlie Brown music plays.

:D  :D   This!  Soooooo juvenile.  ::)

As far as "I'm leaving this thread", well, better to just say "Thanks for advice . . ." )if all is well).  If someone made you angry or people aren't telling you what you want to hear, then don't come back to the thread.
« Last Edit: June 23, 2012, 11:00:28 PM by portabella »
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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #49 on: June 24, 2012, 03:20:33 AM »
I have left threads when the main point has been exhausted. Don't think I've ever said anything though?
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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #50 on: June 24, 2012, 03:54:38 AM »
I think it is almost always unnecessary. Most people only post on a thread once or twice, and do not come back to it, and there is no need for commentary on the matter. It seems a little bit self-centered, as though the poster thinks that everyone is waiting for their reply. It is drawing attention to the fact that they are gone, whereas if they just had stopped posting, people would probably not have noticed.

There are a few exceptions to this, but for the most part it just seems to be making a point that you are not happy with the direction the thread is going, or are upset in some way. People do not go around to every thread they stop posting in if they, say, go on a business trip. It just makes me think of that thing people do where they talk so much about how they do not care it becomes obvious they do care.

I'm not sure that I agree with the bolded. I'm not sure about this forum, since I've only been on here a couple of days, but on other forums I always notice if someone has left, particularly if that person has been arguing vigorously. It looks odd to see someone who has seemed heavily invested in a discussion just drop out. That said, I totally agree that there are flouncy ways of leaving a thread. But just saying 'I've said my piece, and I'm bowing out now' seems quite good netiquette to me.


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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #51 on: June 24, 2012, 01:50:26 PM »
I agree that the flounce is a bit over the top.  I recall one heated thread where the poster kept posting she was leaving, she was taking a break, she was going to go follow the Coke Rule and KEPT COMING BACK.  Someone even posted in reply that the point of the Coke Rule wasn't to announce it to everyone and even a mod had to intervene and tell the poster, basically, look, you already said you were leaving so why do you keep responding and, I think, told the person to put a lid on it for a little bit or it would be done for her (which, I think, finally shut her up).

I've only once felt the need to announce my exit from a thread because the other poster kept arguing the same points over and over with me, even though I addressed the points multiple times.  By the third or fourth time addressing them, I pointed out that I'd already addressed them upthread and was no longer going to respond on those matters.  Oddly, my post was the very last on that thread so I guess neither that poster nor anyone else had anything further to contribute.  The other poster was quite annoying.  I wondered why the same things kept getting brought up by that poster when they had already been addressed, and the discussion was getting brain-hurty and feeling like a huge waste of time.


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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #52 on: June 24, 2012, 04:26:10 PM »
Would it not be more useful to ask the moderators to close the thread?


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Re: Your thoughts on: "I'm leaving this thread."
« Reply #53 on: June 24, 2012, 04:38:57 PM »
Would it not be more useful to ask the moderators to close the thread?

Depends on the topic and how the thread is going. One person doesn't usually get to veto an entire thread. Just because they aren't continuing to discuss it doesn't mean that others can't. You'll find that the mods respond to close requests if a thread is getting out of hand, or going around in circles, but they leave productive threads going, even if one or more people have dropped out.
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