S/O Breaking things... Replacing broken things

[Tea Drinker]

If you own rare, expensive (relative to your values) or hard to replace items, put them away in a locked glass cabinet or just don't let people touch them.  In the OP's case, why was her friend handling the expensive glass vase?  My mother used to say, "Look with your eyes, not your hands" and I think this applies to this thread.

That, or accept that even rare and expensive items may break sometimes. A couple of friends of mine got a pair of delicate, multicolored liqueur glasses as wedding gifts. They refer to them as "the broken glasses" because they realized that the only way to actually enjoy that gift was to accept that the glasses would break, probably sooner than later, and drink out of them anyway. (So far, so good: they've been married 11 years, and still had both glasses when I last visited them, in June.)

[cheyne]

~Snip~

That, or accept that even rare and expensive items may break sometimes. A couple of friends of mine got a pair of delicate, multicolored liqueur glasses as wedding gifts. They refer to them as "the broken glasses" because they realized that the only way to actually enjoy that gift was to accept that the glasses would break, probably sooner than later, and drink out of them anyway. (So far, so good: they've been married 11 years, and still had both glasses when I last visited them, in June.)

~OT~ I read a story years ago (can't remember if it was true or fiction) about a young bride that bought a beautiful outfit but never felt that the occasion was right to wear it.  It hung in a garment bag in her closet for a couple of years, never worn.  She died an untimely death and her husband had her buried in the outfit. 

Your friends are doing the right thing IMO.  Use and enjoy what you have, you never know when it will be taken away from you.

[rashea]

I think an offer to replace something should be genuine. But, the owner should expect to do the legwork of finding the exact piece themselves if it is rare. It's just not feasible for me to spend time hunting down a particular piece. And some of the depression glass isn't expensive, but it is hard to find. A collector would know where to hunt. An amateur wouldn't. If the owner can send me to a website where I can order it, great, but expecting me to spend my time hunting antique shops would strain the friendship. If it's sentimental and you must have that particular piece, I think it's a good idea to protect it in a cabinet or something.

[Just Lori]

Miss Manners addresses a similar question here:

http://jaylipp.fatcow.com/Fun/MissManners/manners_entertaining.html

The gist, as I read it, is that when it's a valuable piece, of course the guest offers to pay and of course the host says it's not necessary.  (She does a much better job of describing how the conversation goes.)  But it comes down to how it was used.  If the piece was being misused - i.e. the guest decides to throw the vase in the air and catch it - then the guest should expect to replace it at full value.  If it was a genuine oops, then the host should consider that "wear, tear and an occasional whoops are a normal part of running a household."

In the OP, I do believe it was a genuine oops and the host should graciously let the guest off the hook.

[LadyClaire]

~Snip~

That, or accept that even rare and expensive items may break sometimes. A couple of friends of mine got a pair of delicate, multicolored liqueur glasses as wedding gifts. They refer to them as "the broken glasses" because they realized that the only way to actually enjoy that gift was to accept that the glasses would break, probably sooner than later, and drink out of them anyway. (So far, so good: they've been married 11 years, and still had both glasses when I last visited them, in June.)

~OT~ I read a story years ago (can't remember if it was true or fiction) about a young bride that bought a beautiful outfit but never felt that the occasion was right to wear it.  It hung in a garment bag in her closet for a couple of years, never worn.  She died an untimely death and her husband had her buried in the outfit. 

Your friends are doing the right thing IMO.  Use and enjoy what you have, you never know when it will be taken away from you.

My great-uncle got a new shirt for christmas, one year. It was a really nice shirt, nicer than what he usually bought for himself, and considerably more expensive than what he would have spent himself. He was so worried about ruining the shirt that he never wore it, always saying he was afraid of getting it stained or ripped, and that he was saving it for a truly special occasion.

He died of a massive heart attack while jogging on the beach. He was buried in the shirt.

My Mom has always told us after that to use things. Wear those "special occasion" outfits and eat off the good china, because life itself should be occasion enough.

[Thipu1]

Most of the nice things we have, we use.  Some, we don't.

I have a small collection of Van Briggle pottery.  That stays on a nicely secure high shelf. 

You don't want your house to look like the velvet ropes should be up but, certain precautions should be taken.  Really valuable things should be safely out of the reach of children or known klutzes. 

However, if something of value breaks, I would offer compensation to the owner and mean it. 

That's unlikely to happen because, in the presence of rare things, we automatically assume the 'Museum position'... Hands in pockets or behind the back.