Author Topic: Acquaitance is now a policeman?  (Read 4397 times)

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SheryllJane

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Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« on: June 17, 2012, 12:37:30 AM »
I'm in a service club, and on my way to the service club another member saw me speeding and brought it up to me at the meeting, commenting on how fast I saw going.  He was in no danger, and was just spouting off.  Would an appropriate response be:  So kind of you to take an interest in my driving habits (said sweetly)?

MrsCrazyPete

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #1 on: June 17, 2012, 12:42:11 AM »
In short, yes. Your driving is none of his business.
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LifeOnPluto

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #2 on: June 17, 2012, 02:53:07 AM »
I'm a little confused. I assume that this acquaintance is NOT actually a policeman?

Even if that's the case, I still think he wasn't necessarily rude for giving you a "heads up" that you were speeding (assuming you were in fact, speeding!). I don't want to sound preachy, but speed is a huge factor in many accidents, and if you're exceeding the speed limit, that can endanger other drivers in the vicinity (like your acquaintance).

Provided he did so in a polite discreet manner, and not a rude, public manner, I don't think he was rude at all for remarking that you were speeding.

Steve

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #3 on: June 17, 2012, 03:07:15 AM »
I think your drivingspeed is none of his business. And I pod the use of "So kind of you to take an interest."



cicero

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #4 on: June 17, 2012, 03:37:24 AM »
were you speeding?

If you were actually going over the legal speed limit - then I am with LifeOnPluto - he wasn't rude. I have zero tolerance for drivers who speed or are otherwise reckless as you are putting others at risk. So i wouldn't say that your driving speed is none of his business.

If you weren't going over the legal limit - then say so "I actually wasn't speeding"

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Bijou

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #5 on: June 17, 2012, 03:57:15 AM »
were you speeding?

If you were actually going over the legal speed limit - then I am with LifeOnPluto - he wasn't rude. I have zero tolerance for drivers who speed or are otherwise reckless as you are putting others at risk. So i wouldn't say that your driving speed is none of his business.

If you weren't going over the legal limit - then say so "I actually wasn't speeding"
I agree with you.  Speeding does put others at risk, which includes him, so, yes, it is his business. 
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MariaE

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #6 on: June 17, 2012, 05:29:44 AM »
were you speeding?

If you were actually going over the legal speed limit - then I am with LifeOnPluto - he wasn't rude. I have zero tolerance for drivers who speed or are otherwise reckless as you are putting others at risk. So i wouldn't say that your driving speed is none of his business.

If you weren't going over the legal limit - then say so "I actually wasn't speeding"
I agree with you.  Speeding does put others at risk, which includes him, so, yes, it is his business.

Agreed. Same thing would have applied if he had said "I saw you talking on the cell phone while driving".
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Lauren

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #7 on: June 17, 2012, 06:22:46 AM »
Unless the OP was going incredibly fast, there's no way for the acquaintence to know how fast she was going. Humans cannot acurratly measure speed from eyeballing something.

EMuir

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #8 on: June 17, 2012, 06:41:59 AM »
Unless the OP was going incredibly fast, there's no way for the acquaintence to know how fast she was going. Humans cannot acurratly measure speed from eyeballing something.

Which tells us that she must have been going quite fast.  I doubt he would have said anything if she was going only a few above the limit.  You can also quite easily tell if someone is speeding if you're driving at the limit and they pass you.

I am really not sure how to respond to a casual comment like that.  Is it possible he meant it in a positive way?  I've heard guys brag about having cars that are so quick they don't realize they're speeding.

Steve

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #9 on: June 17, 2012, 06:48:59 AM »
This thread has me thinking, because so many of you feel that it is okay to 'reprimande' another adult if they choose to do something that might put others at risk.

I would use the "kind of you to take an interest" phrase as stated before. It would also annoy me to no end if someone did this to me. I feel that I am a responsible adult and nobody without proper authority should lecture or reprimande me. "They are not my mother" -type thing I suppose.

Sometimes, you can break the speedlimit and not pose a risk to anyone else. There are places (A lot around here) where the speedlimit is plain ludicrus (and thus often broken). I would not like to get into discussions about it with people that feel the need to point out my transgressions, knowing full well they have transgressions of their own.

And yes, just like everyone else, I have my vices, and I do bend and transgres rules as I see fit. Others might not agree with this, but we all get along much better if people minded their own business and let the proper authorities handle situations.

This is however, my own personal point of view. I am very interested in the international etiquette of the issue.



Sharnita

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #10 on: June 17, 2012, 07:33:40 AM »
He may not be a policeman but he is a citizen so I think the argument can be made that it is his business.  I worked with somebody who dorve crazy fast.  We would comment on it more thatn once because even pulling into the parling lot she was like a rocket.  In fact it factored into an accident in the parking lot where she was totally at fault. She unabashadly admitted that she had many point on her license all the time because of speeding. Even though she had more than one speed related accident she was certain she was in control. She was also of the opinion that the limits were often "wrong"

As far as Steve's argument that the "proper authorities" should handle it, I know of very few communities where there is literally a cop on every corner to monitor traffic.  In a lot of communities they had had to downsize their police force due to budetary restraints.  In the area where I teach, reporting that your house was broken into might take several hours before the police respond.  There simply aren't a lot of cruisers out there to enforce speed limits. That doesn't mean other drivers or the citizens living in those neighborhoods don't have the right to expect people to obey the law.

Kitty Hawk

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #11 on: June 17, 2012, 09:03:10 AM »

Sometimes, you can break the speedlimit and not pose a risk to anyone else. There are places (A lot around here) where the speedlimit is plain ludicrus (and thus often broken).

But the law doesn't say "The speed limit is X, if you feel like it" or "Come to a complete stop at the stop sign if you want".  It says "the speed limit is X" and "Stop".

I have to agree with those who think the other person was not rude for pointing out that the OP was violating the law.

Redsoil

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #12 on: June 17, 2012, 09:24:48 AM »
Then there ae the people who habitually drive very slowly.  Therefore, anyone going faster than them "appears" to be speeding.  I actually had this happen to me - I'd overtaken a patient on my way to work (not even having to exceed the speed limit to do so!) and she commented to all and sundry about how I "sped" past. 

I think the OP could quite easily deflect the comment by effecting disinterest, perhaps with a comment along the lines of "So kind of you..." or even "Isn't it funny how perceptions can differ?"  Then beandip.
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Sharnita

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #13 on: June 17, 2012, 09:34:06 AM »
OP admits to speeding. It wasn't an issue of a really slow driver with faulty perception.

Roe

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Re: Acquaitance is now a policeman?
« Reply #14 on: June 17, 2012, 09:42:41 AM »
This thread has me thinking, because so many of you feel that it is okay to 'reprimande' another adult if they choose to do something that might put others at risk.

Safety trumps etiquette.  Speeding is very dangerous.  Even if he wasn't personally at risk, others on the road were.