Dear Abby: Dinner Guest Grows Weary of Catering to Her Hostess 7/8/12

[LeveeWoman]

The mixing is not important to me.

To me, what is important is that this "hostess" is demanding that certain guests do her job.

[Perfect Circle]

The mixing is not important to me.

To me, what is important is that this "hostess" is demanding that certain guests do her job.

I agree. If you host you host, you don't use your guests as labour.

And potluck is just that, potluck. You get what people bring, you don't go assigning dishes to them.

[thedudeabides]

I'd go buy some pre-baked cupcakes, a jar of canned frosting, and beg use of a knife from the "host."

[LazyDaisy]

Evil Daisy wouldn't bring any item of food or beverage and opt for flowers or little soaps or something inedible for a hostess gift. Let the hostess hem and haw about that one -- she'll appear rude and ungrateful if she expresses any disappointment about the gift. Bad evil Daisy   

I don't mind as much at a true potluck if the organizer asks me to bring something specific or within a category -- like "please bring an appetizer, but just so you know Betty is already bringing a veggie tray and Wilma said she'd make hummus." I don't want to eat 5 dishes of the same thing anymore than anyone else does. The only exception would be if I was asked to bring something completely out of my budget, too time intensive, or I can't stand to eat it myself -- but I have no problem stating that and asking if the organizer could suggest something else. Luckily I've never run across that issue.

[WillyNilly]

Evil Daisy wouldn't bring any item of food or beverage and opt for flowers or little soaps or something inedible for a hostess gift. Let the hostess hem and haw about that one -- she'll appear rude and ungrateful if she expresses any disappointment about the gift. Bad evil Daisy   

Bonus points if the little soaps are shaped like colorful fruits and could easily be mistaken for marzipan!