General Etiquette > Life...in general

Unusually Quiet

(1/5) > >>

mbbored:
I'm what might be considered a social introvert: I'm chatty and have fun in group settings, but it takes a lot out of me emotionally.

This Saturday I was a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding. That meant spending the whole day with people, from morning brunch and hair appointments, through the ceremony and pictures, to being sat with mostly strangers at dinner and dancing at the reception. I had a lot of fun but used up more than my share of emotional energy.

Now, most Sunday mornings I attend a women's running group. Normally I'm one of the chatty ones, but this Sunday I was still drained from the wedding, so I found myself jogging quietly in the back of the pack. Two women who I often talk to but don't particularly consider to be close friends dropped back to join me and started to strike up a conversation. I smiled and said "Sorry ladies, but I'm not feeling particularly conversational this morning. You go on ahead and I'll see you at the end of the run!"

Both women then decided to pepper me with questions about why I didn't want to talk, was I sad, was I angry, was I depressed, did I get in a fight. I tried to shrug it off, but then they switched to almost taunting me, making giant smiley faces at me and making jokes back and forth about sulky mbbored. Honestly, before I wasn't angry, but I was by then.

Was I rude to go to an activity where socializing isn't the main focus and be quieter than usual? Or was I rude by declining to participate in conversation when asked to? If I had plans for something more talk focused, like book club or coffee with friends, I would have dug up reserves to hold up my end of the conversation with a smile on my face, but am I also required to when going to group exercise?

hannahmollysmom:
You weren't rude. I have days like that myself. I just would have said that I had a busy social day, the day before, and was looking to just reflect and clear my mind, and to please give me space.

Ceallach:
People are so strange, why on earth can't they take things at face value?   You quite politely said you weren't in the mood to chat, and instead of accepting that they did the exact opposite to what you'd indicated.   I think they were actually very rude.    It is not abnormal to not always want to chat while running, for all they knew you might have just wanted to focus on your form/heart rate/physique that day.   If they were close friends with you and you exhibited a sudden change in behaviour then yes, their concern might be warranted.  But as it stands they were boors ignoring a polite and reasonable request.

Pippen:
No. They were pestering you after being clearly told you weren't up for idle chit chat. That does not mean anything is wrong. It is what it is. They should have to good grace to go 'OK' and leave you alone to enjoy you run in peace.

cicero:
wow - is it me, or are a lot of threads lately reflecting people who are behaving like 6th graders?

sheesh.

you were totally not rude. the women were rude - while they may have started out ok (maybe really trying to make sure you were ok or trying to be supportive), they should have left you alone. and making smiely faces, pestering you, and talking about you was rude.

you were not rude to go to a running event while tired and drained - i would have thought it would be the perfect thing to do (i always feel energized after a good work out).

Navigation

[0] Message Index

[#] Next page