Author Topic: Blow Off?  (Read 3517 times)

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RavenousEdenFleur

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Blow Off?
« on: July 18, 2012, 11:32:38 PM »
I have been acquantinces with someone for a while and I'm house sitting in her area, which is about 30 miles away from where I live and will be there for a good month. I suggested a coffee at some point and she said "summer is so busy but have fun" I think I was politely blown off but we have to deal with each other in professional settings at times.. am I being too sensitive this evening and if I am not, how do I deal with that when we meet in person since I have a good indication that she probably doesn't want much more than just an aquanticeship and silly me thought we could be friends. Or am I in a mood and reading too much into this and maybe need to just take a step back?

AustenFan

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Re: Blow Off?
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2012, 11:38:06 PM »
A bit of both.  :-\

She's not interested in being friends, but you only made contact because you're about to find yourself away from home without your normal social group to hang with. Stay professional and find some local events to attend, the month will be over before you know it.

Traveler2

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Re: Blow Off?
« Reply #2 on: July 19, 2012, 12:19:36 AM »
how do I deal with that when we meet in person since I have a good indication that she probably doesn't want much more than just an aquanticeship and silly me thought we could be friends. Or am I in a mood and reading too much into this and maybe need to just take a step back?

Yes, I think you were very politely "blown off".  It could be for any number of reasons that have nothing to do with you as a person, or the acquaintance might not feel the same potential friendship you do.

Either way, you deal with it by being polite, cordial and professional when you meet in the future. You don't need to refer to your declined invitation, just deal with the business at hand. You don't mention what types of professional settings, but whatever the context, simply provide the information/services and exchange greetings.  She may continue to chat with you at the same level as before (you don't mention how often/long you had interacted previously), or she may not.

It's no fun when someone doesn't want the same level of friendship that we do, but it happens.

TheVapors

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Re: Blow Off?
« Reply #3 on: July 19, 2012, 12:41:48 AM »
AustenFan & Traveler2 have got it right.

I know. It sucks. But, we carry on politely.

Sophie Jenkins

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Re: Blow Off?
« Reply #4 on: July 20, 2012, 09:52:50 PM »
It's possible it was a polite blow-off. It's also possible that she's genuinely incredibly busy this summer. I have an acquaintance I'd love to get a coffee with sometime this summer, but I'm just so busy that my free time is needed for some solo recharging.

Sorry that you're disappointed. That's no fun.

RavenousEdenFleur

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Re: Blow Off?
« Reply #5 on: July 30, 2012, 11:57:48 PM »
Update- I got a text from her saying that she had some time next week and if I was around house sitting still we should get some coffee. So I guess she was just busy. I realize that if it was a blow off though, I agree with you guys, nothing would change professionally because it wasn't anything rude, so it's business as usual.

Bees

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Re: Blow Off?
« Reply #6 on: August 08, 2012, 09:41:03 PM »
I'm glad it resolved well.

Perhaps she was just taken off guard and needed to take a bit to decide it would be a good idea.
It's hard to be social sometimes.