General Etiquette > Life...in general

BYO Everything?

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JacklynHyde:
This starts out online but is a more universal question than one that would be in the Tech folder.  If the mods disagree, please feel free to move it.

My husband and I live in his home town.  Because he doesn't like Facebook, several of his high school friends have sent me requests as his proxy, and I have accepted the few requests from people I actually know.  They have his direct email address and several also have his phone number.  This week, I received a Facebook message that two of my husband's classmates were visiting town and there would be a big meetup at "Cassie's" house. 

I asked that Husband be contacted directly since I was dealing with work and family drama and couldn't corral him to make a decision on my own.  This didn't happen.  Instead, I got further messages that the hosts would be serving nothing to their guests.  The note said, "I know it's short notice but if you could make it byob that would be great! We have cups and whatnot but the byob would be peachy!  The byob also goes for pop or tea or something non-alcoholic. We have water, of course if that's all you want."

Am I safe in politely declining or even ignoring the invitation?  I do not know most of the guests, have never met the ones visiting from out of town, and am a little put out that my requests that Husband be contacted instead of me were ignored.  The beverage request was just icing.  I would've been happy to help friends with a potluck (which I'm doing later this weekend), but neither is the case.

Sharnita:
I don't think the beverage request was all that outrageous, actually.  I think people tend to have such specific drink preferences that it stikes me as reasonable.  They do make it clear they have water and cups so if you are OK with water, they have you covered.  I am unclear if your husband is interested in going since these are people he knows.  I would talk to him and ask if he wants to go and then politely accept or decline.

Harriet Jones:
I think it's a little odd that they're not providing anything to drink other than water, but at least they're making it clear up front.

And it's a little unclear in your post, but are the hosts providing any food, or is that included in the BYO everything?

Cleargleam:
My housemate is allergic to milk, and doesn't drink soda. When her boyfriend suggested three host three of his friends for a game night (for which she provided extensive party trays of snacks), she told him that it would have to be guests bring their own beverages - we just don't have beverages other than water on hand.

KenveeB:
When you said "everything", I was picturing you having to bring your own food, drinks, plates, napkins, and flatware! "We have water, bring whatever other drinks you want" seems pretty reasonable to me for a casual get-together.

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