Secret Santa

[JonGirl]

Not rude, but sometimes office politics prohibit opting out. I opted out the 4 years I worked in an office, but I didn't really want to advance in that field so didn't much care.
I opted out at the school, too, but the teachers knew I didn't socialize much, although I was well-respected for my work, so no problem there, either.

I know this bolded here is bothering me but I can't quite put my finger on why.

[Venus193]

Some small companies have a "family" atmosphere that is too close for many people's comfort.  My last place was like that.  I sometimes think that opting out of the pool party in the summer contributed to my termination in the fall.

In a place that size opting out of a party is too visible unless you happened to have scheduled your vacation during that time.

[girlysprite]

Where I live (the netherlands) we also have a sort of secret santa tradition, though it happens on another date (around 5 dec), and the deal is that you have to to package the gift in a fun/original/creative manner, which may or may not be accompanied by a small poem about the gift or person. Some examples of fun gift packages I've seen:

1: A stuffed horse whose head had to be pulled off to reach the gift that was inside
2: A tube decorated to look like a candle
3: large firecrackers
4: Box decorated to look like a shark, with a whole where it's mouth was - grab the gift inside.

They sound elaborate, but there are plenty of ideas which are fun and easy to make. Of course, people must like the creative idea and not be too lazy about it. The benefit is that it doesn't really matter anymore when everyone buys giftcards - it's more about the fun to see people trying to unwrap their gift!

[O'Dell]

Where I live (the netherlands) we also have a sort of secret santa tradition, though it happens on another date (around 5 dec), and the deal is that you have to to package the gift in a fun/original/creative manner, which may or may not be accompanied by a small poem about the gift or person. Some examples of fun gift packages I've seen:

1: A stuffed horse whose head had to be pulled off to reach the gift that was inside
2: A tube decorated to look like a candle
3: large firecrackers
4: Box decorated to look like a shark, with a whole where it's mouth was - grab the gift inside.

They sound elaborate, but there are plenty of ideas which are fun and easy to make. Of course, people must like the creative idea and not be too lazy about it. The benefit is that it doesn't really matter anymore when everyone buys giftcards - it's more about the fun to see people trying to unwrap their gift!

I like that idea. That's a good way to personalize a not so personal gift. And would cheer up a party.

I and my husband actually favor gift cards for other people. It's just so easy and we know they'll appreciate and use them. Origami is one of my husband's hobbies so he makes personalized boxes to hold the card and maybe a few rocks/crystals (he's pagan). He made one for a couple for their wedding using material from their handmade wedding invitation. The bride and groom loved it.

[bloo]

What about people who belong to religions that do not do Christmas -- like me?  I work freelance, so I really don't know how your office would handle that. The faculty don't do it at HugeU where the Professor works, though sometimes staff departments and grad students do.
Seriously -- I wouldn't want to bring people down or make people stop doing something they find fun. This has happened to me: far as I am concerned, have all the Christmas/Chaunnuka parties you want and enjoy.  I just won't come.  I certainly don't want people to stop having them -- but a couple of time I have said I couldn't come -- and a date change was not the answer --and the party just stopped happening.  So -- how does your firm handle the person who does not want to participate because it is against their religion (Secret Santa)?
And how does one get across that just because one doesn't want to go to a Christmas party (carols, trees, etc.) doesn't mean one doesn't want you to have the party and enjoy the heck out of it?
This doesn't apply to HugeU parties because everyone tries very hard to be "inclusive" so it hasn't come up, but it has come up in social and affinity groups.  Ideas?

This is what I was thinking about. It would be sad to feel like one 'must' participate in order to keep one's job or advance in one's career. While I don't celebrate x-mas, it wouldn't bother me at all that other people do (or Hanukah, Kwanzaa, etc.) but it would bother me tremendously to feel like my job was on the line for not participating in something because it would violate my religious beliefs. Not an issue for me now as my boss/business owner is the same religion as me.

This is why there should be an atmosphere of acceptance in a workplace. "I don't feel like participating" should be as good a reason not to participate as any other and no one should be made to feel like 'scrooge' for not doing it.

At the same time, others who wish to party/participate should feel free to do so. If everyone shows kindness and respect, no one needs to get offended.

Sorry, no ideas though.

[VltGrantham]

This is why there should be an atmosphere of acceptance in a workplace. "I don't feel like participating" should be as good a reason not to participate as any other and no one should be made to feel like 'scrooge' for not doing it.

There should be, unfortunately there definitely isn't.  I can't remember if it was Dear Abby or Annie's Mailbox or whatever that had an article recently about how if you want to get ahead at work these days, the corporate attitude is basically that you have to over-inflate your contributions to the organization, your group's progress, and accomplishments.  Ethics seem to be a foreign concept in today's work environment and those who don't do the group dynamic are often forced out.