**OP update pg. 5**
I hope you all can help me.
My BIL (hubby's brother) is getting married in November at a restaurant that is not really child friendly, so I've assumed that my sons (aged 12 &
will not be invited. My husband has already said (to me) that he won't go if our boys aren't invited. I asked why and he said that we take them everywhere (not true but I let that slide) and that they are part of the family and aren't a problem at other family gatherings. I didn't start an argument because at this stage it is all conjecture. If it helps, some other points are:
1. Our boys are well behaved but do get bored so I spend a large chunk of hubby's family gatherings with the kids.
2. I want to go to the wedding.
3. If our kids are invited, doesn't etiquette say that the ONLY other kids on both sides are Hubby's niece & nephew (age 3 & 5 - and the 5yo is naughty) should also be invited?
4. Child care is not a problem for us.
So what do I need help with? When we get the invitation & it is for us only, what words can I use to 1) calm hubby down, 2) convince him that it isn't rude for the boys to not be invited and 3) that we should go.