I have no real advice for you, as my father sounds very similar to yours, and is constantly steamrolling me on anything he can. My parents are recently separated, and I'm now seeing how my father does this to everyone in his life, not just me (which is sad,but makes me feel so much better).
Issues in my life with my Dad lately are, why I haven;t finished my patio (my husband broke his leg), why we haven't bought an island for our kitchen (we haven't found one we like), why I don't want to look after his puppy when he goes away with his new gf (I told him before he got the dog that I would not be looking after it). Sadly this weekend I still took the dog, and then had anxiety about it all weekend as I was so mad at myself for backing down.
I am glad to hear that you are doing better at shutting your father down, and I'm hoping to take strength from that that it can be done. I like your use of "why do you think I haven't done that yet", I'm hoping its something I can use on my father.
Basically just wanted to let you know that you arent alone, and some (hugs) as I know I find it so very difficult to break the pattern of getting hurt every time he tells me I'm doing something "wrong".