I think it's very SS for a person to go "I shouldn't have to tell them what needs doing, they should just know!" and then get annoyed when that person doesn't psychically know what they want. Grownups need to be able to communicate their needs effectively.
While I understand and agree with your point, I don't feel I should have to point out to DH that the garbage is past the danger level and is now actively overflowing, and that he agreed to take it out when it's full. He has eyes, he can see the can, see the overflow, see the trash hit the floor when he puts yet another item on top of the heap. WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH DO I NEED TO TELL HIM TO TAKE THE TRASH OUT in this situation??? And yet, I do.... He does not see the overflow. He does not see the trash hit the floor. He does not see me getting red in the face with ire and frustration. He does not care how bad the house gets... He does not care. The only time he does any house work is when he has invited somebody to the house that he does not want to see the mess he makes of our home. The ONLY TIME.
In my defense, and because I don't want to spend every waking hour picking up after him, I have made myself blind to the mess. I can't stand it, and I do love him, but I hate how he lives. I do all the house work that gets done, and there are certain rooms I have surrendered to him. He was not this bad when we started dating
, although I can look back now and see the beginnings of it. If I had known then what I know now, I may well not have married him 29 years ago.