Is This Rude? Self-preservation? Both?

[BabyMama]

I don't understand why you couldn't say no to her demands, however, if you really wanted to buy the place.  Who cares what her situation is?  Her childcare issues are not yours to solve.  If she tried to do a drop and run I would make sure she knew I was calling CPS as soon as she left.

As a person in a neighborhood with a moocher, I recommend (if you move in) to keep her at arm's length and give her no way to communicate with her. Our moocher lives on the other side of the culdesac and has approached pretty much everyone else but us--not for lack of trying. Last winter she asked our neighbor (who we are friendly with, our daughters play) if she could have our phone number so my husband could shovel her driveway.  He told her he wouldn't, and she hasn't tried to approach us since.

[lowspark]

Another thing to consider is resalability.  Buying a house with a known flaw can be risky because when you want to move out, you'll be in the same spot as the couple who own the house now. And yes, a neighbor who is known for imposing on others in the neighborhood is a known flaw. I don't see anything rude about deciding not to buy a house, or anything else for that matter, for any reason in the world. My money, my decision. Nothing rude about that.

[CreteGirl]

If you really love the house and the price, what about putting up a backyard fence to keep the neighbors away?  If they ring your doorbell, don't answer.

Keep in mind that the children will not be small forever, and things may change quickly for the better in a few years.

[Shoo]

Keep in mind that the children will not be small forever, and things may change quickly for the better in a few years.

It might, that's true.  Or, like the boy who lives a few houses down from me, it might get worse as the children get bigger.  The boy on my street is now 21 or 22 years old, and when the weather is good -- when everybody wants to be out in their yards enjoying the day, doing gardening, etc. -- this young man stands out on his front yard barking like a dog.  For hours at a time.  Non-stop.  When he's not barking, he's banging a plastic baseball bat against the metal sign post.  As he has gotten older, he has definitely gotten noisier.

[EMuir]

That house would have to be REALLY cheap for you to have to put up with noise and a moochy neighbour, IMHO.  Also, remember you'll probably have trouble selling it later on for the same reasons, so unless you plan to stay there a very long time, you may lose money.

I had a neighbour who was a hoarder.  Occasionally his junk would avalanche onto our sidewalk and we'd toss it back.  Otherwise it didn't really affect us, but it still sucked to live next to him and see that garbage every day. If we'd tried to sell our house while he was living next door I'm sure it would have sold for less.

[lowspark]

Yeah, the child will get older, but if the mom's the type of person who imposes and takes advantage of others, there's no reason to think she'll change her personality will change over the years. I'd skip this house and keep looking.

[WillyNilly]

Hey OP why not suggest the house to your Ex?  Sounds like a great house for a good deal and he sounds (from your other thread) like someone who could use a big dose of being the one asked for unreasonable contributions and support for other people's lifestyles!

[StuffedGrapeLeaves]

Hey OP why not suggest the house to your Ex?  Sounds like a great house for a good deal and he sounds (from your other thread) like someone who could use a big dose of being the one asked for unreasonable contributions and support for other people's lifestyles!

Oh, I just snorted coffee up my nose reading this.  That's a good idea, WillyNilly.   

[LeveeWoman]

Hey OP why not suggest the house to your Ex?  Sounds like a great house for a good deal and he sounds (from your other thread) like someone who could use a big dose of being the one asked for unreasonable contributions and support for other people's lifestyles!

ROFLMBO!!!!!!!

[Fleur]

Hey OP why not suggest the house to your Ex?  Sounds like a great house for a good deal and he sounds (from your other thread) like someone who could use a big dose of being the one asked for unreasonable contributions and support for other people's lifestyles!

I'm evil, because I would actually do this.

[LeveeWoman]

Mooch meets Mooch.

[Fleur]

Mooch meets Mooch.

Mooch and Moocher. Coming soon to a street near you!

[LeveeWoman]

Mooch meets Mooch.

Mooch and Moocher. Coming soon to a street near you!

LOL!

[Tiamet]

Something to bear in mind is that from the other thread is that your ex apparently has you worried that refusing to fund his time with your daughter is unreasonable.  It seems that he has you trained to be the moochee in a moocher/moochee relationship and while it can be seen that your spine is rapidly developing, I don't think you should subject yourself to someone else like this at an early stage.