Author Topic: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?  (Read 12131 times)

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Ceallach

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #15 on: September 25, 2012, 01:06:51 AM »
I think resigning from your job is an overly dramatic response to the situation.   Be clear and honest about the situation and what you can and can't do, but there's no need to jump to that step.   If they decide that they no longer want you employed it will be clear.   

As I explained, resigning was a bit so that they would have time to hire someone else to cover the shift (the non-dramatic part) and a bit to stop them from being able to fire me because I was already quitting kind of thing (only dramatic in the sense that I was thinking they would fire me over my first write up).    Otherwise, I don't understand why you think it is dramatic?  Could you please explain?

Dramatic in that it something that is over the top, perhaps quite striking and effective but possibly disproportionate to the situation.   

I do understand your reasoning in that maybe it would be best for them to have the role free to full - it's entirely possible that this is a solution that would suit them.  But it's equally possible that they'd go "Oh no!  We thought we were just trying to cover one shift and now she's QUITTING?"   Based on what you've posted re the interaction so far, it just isn't clear what they'd prefer.   So while offering to resign could be a nice gesture if you think it will help solve the problem, it really doesn't seem necessary at this stage for you to outright resign. You're jumping from A to C and skipping B.  If that makes sense.    :)     Hence dramatic as in over the top.  (Not in a dramatic, childish way if that's how you took it - certainly didn't mean to imply that!)
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TootsNYC

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #16 on: September 25, 2012, 10:03:58 AM »
I've given them two weeks notice as far as when it came up that I wouldn't be able to be there.  Originally, I had the shift covered, but as soon as I found out that wouldn't work (it would put the other server into overtime), I e-mailed the general manager (which is still within the two weeks timeframe).

If the problem is that the other server will go into overtime covering your shift, could you take one of her shifts earlier in the week?

It doesn't matter anymore because she got tickets to a football game that morning and now isn't available at all.  Otherwise, that was my plan...or not taking paid time off and just taking a day off.




Wow, really? That's sort of bad--to commit to you that she'd take your shift so you could be free for that important test, and then AFTER that she gets tickets to a football game? I know that football games can be hard to get into, there aren't very many of them in a season, but . . .

The mean me would want to mention that reason every single time I brought it up to anyone at the restaurant.

Decimus

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #17 on: September 25, 2012, 11:31:22 AM »
You're overthinking things.  If you ARE switching from bartending into law, frankly, it's extremely unlikely anyone will care even if you DID get fired for skipping work to take the LSAT.  And most people will understand if you tell them "I needed to take the time off to take the LSAT, and gave them advanced notice, and they still wrote me up/fired me/etc over it."

Let it go.

TootsNYC

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #18 on: September 25, 2012, 11:54:16 AM »
Also, if I were hiring for almost any job, if this was the only write-up you had, that doesn't mean I'd worry about hiring you.

Jobs like that are particularly harsh and inflexible. I'd take a single write-up with a grain of salt.

Mental Magpie

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #19 on: September 25, 2012, 12:29:49 PM »
I think resigning from your job is an overly dramatic response to the situation.   Be clear and honest about the situation and what you can and can't do, but there's no need to jump to that step.   If they decide that they no longer want you employed it will be clear.   

As I explained, resigning was a bit so that they would have time to hire someone else to cover the shift (the non-dramatic part) and a bit to stop them from being able to fire me because I was already quitting kind of thing (only dramatic in the sense that I was thinking they would fire me over my first write up).    Otherwise, I don't understand why you think it is dramatic?  Could you please explain?

Dramatic in that it something that is over the top, perhaps quite striking and effective but possibly disproportionate to the situation.   

I do understand your reasoning in that maybe it would be best for them to have the role free to full - it's entirely possible that this is a solution that would suit them.  But it's equally possible that they'd go "Oh no!  We thought we were just trying to cover one shift and now she's QUITTING?"   Based on what you've posted re the interaction so far, it just isn't clear what they'd prefer.   So while offering to resign could be a nice gesture if you think it will help solve the problem, it really doesn't seem necessary at this stage for you to outright resign. You're jumping from A to C and skipping B.  If that makes sense.    :)     Hence dramatic as in over the top.  (Not in a dramatic, childish way if that's how you took it - certainly didn't mean to imply that!)

It makes a lot of sense, thanks for explaining!  In that way, I actually agree with you.  For whatever the reason, these things didn't cross my mind...probably because I'm so ticked at the other server for going and getting football tickets when she found out she couldn't work for me that morning due to overtime.

Yes, TootsNYC, my mean side, too; so far, I've only told it to people not at the restaurant, ie my boyfriend and mom.  You want to know what the worst part is?  She's my best friend.  I really need to sit down and talk with her once I cool off a little...I'm going to go with she forgets I'm taking the LSAT that day...at least I hope.

Also, to give a bit better perspective, this is the restaurant in a hotel that is only open for breakfast, thus she and I are the only two servers.  Her being my best friend is also why I trusted her to cover the shift without requesting the day off (which is usually OK where I work, as long as you let the supervisor know (which I did)....but I'm never doing that again.)

I'm not really worried about the write up, I guess, I'm worried about how pissed off people will be at me because I left them in a lurch simply because my best friend and I are the only two servers.
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amylouky

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #20 on: September 25, 2012, 01:22:02 PM »
It makes a lot of sense, thanks for explaining!  In that way, I actually agree with you.  For whatever the reason, these things didn't cross my mind...probably because I'm so ticked at the other server for going and getting football tickets when she found out she couldn't work for me that morning due to overtime.

Yes, TootsNYC, my mean side, too; so far, I've only told it to people not at the restaurant, ie my boyfriend and mom.  You want to know what the worst part is?  She's my best friend.  I really need to sit down and talk with her once I cool off a little...I'm going to go with she forgets I'm taking the LSAT that day...at least I hope.

I'm not sure why you are ticked at your friend? She got the football tickets AFTER she found out that she couldn't work for you due to the overtime issue, right? So, she didn't have a commitment to you when she got the tickets.

I agree with PP's, this is the management's problem now. You've given them plenty of time to figure out another solution.. don't let this worry distract you from your LSAT preps.

gramma dishes

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #21 on: September 25, 2012, 02:54:13 PM »
I also wish you wouldn't use the term "no show" in describing yourself in this situation.  A no show is someone who is scheduled to work and simply doesn't show up.  Period.

This is certainly not the case here.  You've done everything possible to do what you could to be fair to your employer, but the scheduling of the LSAT is not something you can control or change.  It wouldn't kill the manager herself to come in and take that shift if necessary this one and only time. 

If they would fire you for this, I think it's not a place you'd want to work for anyway.  But I wouldn't quit.  Quitting won't help them anyway.  They'd still be out a server for that day.

TootsNYC

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #22 on: September 25, 2012, 04:07:51 PM »
seriously, they only have two servers? That's the height of folly.

I think you should start suggesting that they find some "on-call backup servers" in case both of you get sick on the same day.


I missed the overtime problem--I'm going to have to go read the thread to see how that fit in.

Mental Magpie

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #23 on: September 25, 2012, 06:47:23 PM »
They found someone to cover the shift, thankfully, and aren't mad at me at all.  Phew.

In other good news, I have to quit anyway...as I start my Corrections Officer job on October 22!
The problem with choosing the lesser of two evils is that you're still choosing evil.

Ceallach

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #24 on: September 25, 2012, 07:23:29 PM »
I also wish you wouldn't use the term "no show" in describing yourself in this situation.  A no show is someone who is scheduled to work and simply doesn't show up.  Period.

This is certainly not the case here.  You've done everything possible to do what you could to be fair to your employer, but the scheduling of the LSAT is not something you can control or change.  It wouldn't kill the manager herself to come in and take that shift if necessary this one and only time. 

If they would fire you for this, I think it's not a place you'd want to work for anyway.  But I wouldn't quit.  Quitting won't help them anyway.  They'd still be out a server for that day.

A very good point!   I actually had to query one of my admin staff about that the other day.  She'd logged a report in the system for one of our workers as a no show.   Except the worker wasn't due to start for another hour, so I knew that couldn't possibly be accurate!  ::)   Turns out, the worker had been running a few minutes late for unavoidable reasons, and they realised that because of that she wouldn't be able to see the particular client and still attend to another very important client later in the day.   The admin called this client and she said she was happy to reschedule until tomorrow.   So not ideal, but all sorted.    And the worker hadn't really done a single thing wrong.

I explained to the admin "A no show is a big deal. It means we were expecting the person to show up, and then they didn't.  If we know in advance that they're not going or if we aren't expecting them to go, then it's no longer a no show!"  It might still be a bad situation, but nowhere near as bad.
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TheaterDiva1

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #25 on: September 25, 2012, 07:58:33 PM »
They found someone to cover the shift, thankfully, and aren't mad at me at all.  Phew.

In other good news, I have to quit anyway...as I start my Corrections Officer job on October 22!

That's great news... and congratulations on the new job! :)

RiverSong

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #26 on: September 25, 2012, 08:15:16 PM »
I am a little confused. If you had your shift covered and that person decided not to cover it, why is this not their responsibility to find cover now?

Mental Magpie

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #27 on: September 25, 2012, 09:32:06 PM »
I am a little confused. If you had your shift covered and that person decided not to cover it, why is this not their responsibility to find cover now?

Because I didn't have it actually cleared with my supervisor (lesson learned) because it usually isn't necessary.
The problem with choosing the lesser of two evils is that you're still choosing evil.

JenJay

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #28 on: September 26, 2012, 02:39:29 PM »
They found someone to cover the shift, thankfully, and aren't mad at me at all.  Phew.

In other good news, I have to quit anyway...as I start my Corrections Officer job on October 22!

Congratulations!!

Mental Magpie

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Re: How to say "Well I'm still not going to be there"?
« Reply #29 on: September 26, 2012, 04:02:52 PM »
Thank you!
The problem with choosing the lesser of two evils is that you're still choosing evil.