"I didn’t realize it’s a competition" (s/o "You obviously don’t have children")

[stitchygreyanonymouse]

In cases of Mommy-jacking, one-up-manship, etc, is "I didn’t realize it’s a competition" considered a rude response?

If so, can you think of a better way of wording the same sentiment?

Is it more or less rude on the first occasion as opposed to a repeat offender?

I suppose the medium of delivery can influence it too… would you word it differently on Facebook than in person? (Or like suggested in the other thread, just ignore and delete on FB?)

[WillyNilly]

In cases of Mommy-jacking, one-up-manship, etc, is "I didn’t realize it’s a competition" considered a rude response?

I don't think so.  Its not a warm fuzzy super friendly response, but I don't think its rude.

[ddawn23]

I rather like "People in X group do not have a monopoly on Y."  So in the 'you obviously don't have children' case it would be "People with children do not have a monopoly on sleepless nights."  That way you get to grant them that being in group X is hard while gently reminding them that other people have it hard too.

[QueenofAllThings]

^ love that!

I also agree with WillyNilly - if said in a gentle voice with a smile, it means one thing; said snappishly and sharply, another.
Not necessarily rude. But I wouldn't use it Facebook - it's tone-deaf.

[Zilla]

It depends on how it was handled.


For an example:


My child won second place in her spelling bee!


Oh? My child won first place.


Then I would ignore this.  But if they continued to one up you, then you can indeed say lightly, "I didn't realize this was a competition, but congratulations!"