Petty things that start wars in every office

[HermioneGranger]

There's no extra TP in my office. The custodians keep it, and refill it as needed.

Same here. The problem is our custodian is out on FMLA right now. They have not replaced her. A cleaning crew comes in once a week to clean the bathrooms and make sure the TP is filled, but the problem with that is we have over 100 people using the bathrooms here.

A lot of us have had to grit our teeth and wipe with those tissue paper seat covers, because there was no toilet paper.

I think I'd be buying my own roll and carrying it back and forth with me.   

[jmarvellous]

My new employer seems great as far as these standard issues -- I'll take one industrial fridge for 7 floors of employees if it means no stink, and I'll take a sink area covered in dirty company cups if there's a maintenance person to wash and replace them several times a day. The replacement office supplies are plentiful and easy to get.


But my last employer, well, let's just say the pinnacle was the picture of human waste on a toilet handle, posted to the employees-only Facebook page. (Well, maybe it was the poor person who encountered it, or the one who managed to create the mess.) We had an incredible fridge problem, and monthly cleanups barely helped. And let's just say the time one co-worker was sent a Dyson vacuum to test was better than Christmas -- I don't think my desk area was cleaned by maintenance more than once every 2 years.

Staplers were more precious than gold.

[Outdoor Girl]

Each stall has two toilet paper holders at my office.  A couple of summers ago, there were 7 summer students, 6 of them female.  I was constantly changing out toilet paper every time I went.  Many times, I had to change both rolls and one time, I went in to both rolls empty with a roll started on the back of the toilet.

These kids were in college; you'd think they could figure out how to change a toilet paper roll.

A few years back, we actually ran out of toilet paper.  The cleaners normally left two rolls on the tank of each toilet for replacing.  We'd used all the spare rolls and went to the cupboard for more.  There was none there.  The cleaning company made an emergency run over with enough paper to see us through the day.  And that particular cleaner got fired.  Turns out, she'd sprained her ankle and instead of letting the company know she couldn't do the job for a couple weeks, she showed up and did her homework at one of our desks every night and didn't actually do any cleaning!

And I now have a roll of toilet paper in my desk, just in case.

[Sirius]

I had a roll of TP that I'd brought from home locked in my desk, plus sanitary products and cheap pens.  I'd give the cheap pens to the doctors; they'd ask for a pen to sign charts, then get paged, stick the pen in their pocket, and I'd never see it again.  My multi-colored Bic pens were for my paperwork, and I kept them locked up as well. 

[SoCalVal]

I used to keep a holder full of pens with flowers attached to them -- like someone said upthread, I attached the flowers so people wouldn't walk off with the pen.  One person protested and asked to use one of my regular pens (I used the cheap pens for the flowers and kept my preferred pens below the counter).  I said no (he was the worst one about walking off with my pens) and told him that if he wanted a different pen to use, he needed to carry one (he never did, which was part of the problem).

[anniehawks]

I once worked with someone who was extremely stingy with our supplies.  While this person was in charge of ordering supplies, they took frugality to a whole new level.  Everything was either locked up or hidden, so if you needed something, say for example, staples.  This person would take your stapler to the hidden stash of staples, fill your stapler for you, and bring it back.  We weren't allowed to have access to any extra supplies.  Same with the glue, they would get the glue bottle out of hiding, let you use it, then return it to its hiding place.

[Pippen]

I once worked with someone who was extremely stingy with our supplies.  While this person was in charge of ordering supplies, they took frugality to a whole new level.  Everything was either locked up or hidden, so if you needed something, say for example, staples.  This person would take your stapler to the hidden stash of staples, fill your stapler for you, and bring it back.  We weren't allowed to have access to any extra supplies.  Same with the glue, they would get the glue bottle out of hiding, let you use it, then return it to its hiding place.

I once worked in a large department in a large company and if you wanted a pen (because someone had invariably nicked yours) you had to take a pen to your manager and show them it was out of ink.

[NotTheNarcissist]

OK I know this is uber petty but does anyone else get irritated at the sound of flip flops in the office? I mean they are distracting and I need to concentrate....

[camlan]

OK I know this is uber petty but does anyone else get irritated at the sound of flip flops in the office? I mean they are distracting and I need to concentrate....

Yes.

And it's not just flip-flops. There are all sorts of slides and mules that make slapping sounds as people walk. The summers in my old office, which was chiefly women, were full of flipping, flapping, slapping, and shuffling sounds because of the footwear they chose.

[Giggity]

I don't like slappy shoes, but I'll take them any day over whatever shoes it is that make women (it's always women) shuffle and slide their feet along the floor. Pick up your feet and take actual steps! You learned when you were small.

[Kari]

My office's petty battle-starters:

Kitchen behavior. I could fuel the website Passive Aggressive Notes solely on the Post-Its that pop on in my office's kitchen. Half the office seems to become infuriated when the kitchen is not sparkling clean, the other half thinks magical fairy-maids come by to do their dishes, throw away their empty wrappers, and refill the coffeepot/tea kettle.

The candy jar. Woe betide you if you're having a vicious chocolate craving, for the Candy Watchers will loudly berate you if you hit the communal jar hard one day. (Though I've never run afoul of the Watchers, I did get a kick out of one Watcher berating one candy-loving coworker, saying "Those things will give you a heart attack!" before popping out on her smoke break.)

Arrival/departure times. This battle happens every time the office is collectively stressed out by the higher-ups' demand for overtime and working through lunch breaks. Some people will watch their fellow coworkers' arrival/departure/lunch break times like a hawk and loudly comment on them. I think it's a way to defend themselves if the higher-ups call them out on not working hard enough, so they can retort "So and so doesn't work through his lunch, AND he arrives 2 minutes late everyday!" It turns normally reasonable people into insufferable neurotics. I was very surprised one time when it went as far as one coworker altering another's timesheet behind her back to reflect a time that he felt was more accurate to her comings and goings. (He did get chastized by the boss for that, but not formally disciplined.) When the stress of all this seems just about to become unbearable, the coworkers enter into "I don't give a flip anymore" mode, bring in donuts for breakfast or go out for margaritas at lunch, then become calm and agreeable again. Until the next time.

[LadyClaire]

Arrival/departure times. This battle happens every time the office is collectively stressed out by the higher-ups' demand for overtime and working through lunch breaks. Some people will watch their fellow coworkers' arrival/departure/lunch break times like a hawk and loudly comment on them. I think it's a way to defend themselves if the higher-ups call them out on not working hard enough, so they can retort "So and so doesn't work through his lunch, AND he arrives 2 minutes late everyday!" It turns normally reasonable people into insufferable neurotics. I was very surprised one time when it went as far as one coworker altering another's timesheet behind her back to reflect a time that he felt was more accurate to her comings and goings. (He did get chastized by the boss for that, but not formally disciplined.) When the stress of all this seems just about to become unbearable, the coworkers enter into "I don't give a flip anymore" mode, bring in donuts for breakfast or go out for margaritas at lunch, then become calm and agreeable again. Until the next time.

Ha. I had a co-worker who frequently comments on the fact that I leave before anyone else, and that I take lunch before anyone as well. My schedule is 7:30-4:30, and unlike my co-workers, I get to work on time. Usually I'm here 10-15 minutes early, in fact. Labor laws dictate I must clock out for lunch no later than 5 hours after the start of my shift, and HR monitors the time clock and sends nastygrams to the Big Boss if an employee is even 5 minutes late in clocking out for lunch. So yes, I take lunch sooner than everyone, and I leave before everyone else. The co-worker who makes snotty comments about it seems to forget that by the time she strolls in through the door, I've already been at work for over an hour.

She would also call me demanding coverage for her department when she'd have an appointment or event, and then accuse me of being inflexible because she'd call me 5 minutes before the latest possible time I could clock out for lunch. I'd have to tell her "No, sorry, you've left it too late and you'll have to call someone else to cover you." It took me refusing to cover her several times before she finally figured out that if she doesn't call me by 10:30 for coverage, she doesn't get any help from me. She can't call at 11:45, or 12:20 and then get mad when I won't cover for her.

[Lorelei_Evil]

That used to happen to me, too. 

I always used to get from a former employees, in an insufferably Female Dog tone: "Must be nice to leave IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY!"  (hairflip, derisive expression)

I would usually not say anything, until one day she said it in from of The Grandboss.  That was my moment.  She says The Phrase again, complete with tone and expression. 

I just smiled, said: "It sure is nice.  I have time to run errands in the afternoon or even keep a medical appointment.  It makes starting work at 6:00am worth it!""

Grandboss just grinned.