Hi eHell people!
I have a
friend acquaintance who I used to be very close with, but her thrifty ways are making me distance myself from her.
We were best friends all through high school, and once we graduated we drifted apart because she got an apartment with her older (24 when she was 18) boyfriend and her grandmother. I didn't start driving until almost a year after I graduated high school so we didn't see each other much but still communicated often on social media. Then once I had a boyfriend and a license and a car and an apartment with said boyfriend (now fiance), she would try to get us to hang out with her and her boyfriend. We were invited to a couple restaurants in their town, and when we would go she would either immediately tell the waitress we wanted separate checks (without any discussion with us) or she would give us exact change (!!) for their food. Now this girl is the kind of person who believes that she should never have to tip because the servers are just going their job, so we end up tipping for the entire table, paying the tax on their food, etc. We started to stop hanging out with them because eating out was always very awkward, and if invited over their house we would always end up invited there for hours with no food or they would make food in front of us and not offer us anything, or when we said we were getting hungry (hint hint) they would tell us restaurants in the area.
Other examples of this particular friends cheapness:
I went through all my beauty products, (I had an exorbitant amount of lotions and perfumes that I would never make it through) so I called her up, and said jokingly, "hey you like free stuff right, want to come over sometime and look through this huge box of perfume, body sprays, hair products, lotions I have?" she asked if she could come over that night, and I said sure, but that first we had to go to dinner with my boyfriends father, so if she really wanted to come over at 8 at night she could, she did, she took the entire box, and hang out at my apartment for almost 2 hours, during which she said "you got any food?" and got up and opened my fridge before I could answer! She then started pulling out our leftovers going "What about this, can I eat this? Are you going to eat this?"
One other time, I asked her if she wanted to go to a movie with us, if there's no dinner she cant try to stick us with a bill right? Her response was: Not unless you want to buy my ticket.
Now I fully understand wanting to go to something and not having the money, and I even support telling someone you can't afford it right now because you do give them the opportunity to offer to pay for you if they would still like you to go, I've had situations like this with my other (true) best friend, "Oh I'd like to go but money is tight this week, maybe some other time?" "I'll buy your ticket if you want, I'd really like to go with you". I feel like it's different when someone offers to pay for you, rather then putting it on them like "Pay for me or I can't go".
What makes all of this seem even worse in comparison, is that my real best friend and I have a great friendship and no financial awkwardness, sometimes I pay for lunch, sometimes she does, sometimes we split it,sometimes I pick up the bill and she leaves the tip and then buys coffees afterwards, never a problem.
Also more cheap girl examples:
She bought herself a new iphone, had it stolen, started a "GoFundMe" account for her friends to buy her a new one.
She recently posted her amazon gift list on her facebook with the message: "Here's my amazon wishlist in case anyone is so generous this Christmas"
Not really a cheap example but another thing driving a wedge between us is that she openly disapproves of the person I'm in a relationship with, and when I changed my status on facebook from 'single' to 'engaged' she commented "NO." but then still comments on my wedding related statuses with "I better be invited."
To which my mental response is "So I can pay $50+ dollars for you to eat for free and hate my new husband? I DON'T THINK SO", but my actual response is eHell's very own 'complete silence'.
I'd love to hear about everyone else's cheap friends!