I'm going to have to spend a fortune on plane fares and lawyers next week. I have to be in Las Vegas, Phoenix, and Seattle for the court appearances, all on the same day, unless I take care of them via the "attached document."
(I'm listening to our local community radio station, which has volunteer broadcaster. The 6 AM to 9 AM broadcaster just got April Fooled by the 9-12 broadcaster who called in to say "I'll be late because highway such & such is closed due to snow." The 6AM person announced it over the air, as they always report major road closures. The 9 AM person walked into the studio five minutes later. )