S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers

[jedikaiti]

The Bloggess came up with a great way to respond to the (usually really rather inappropriate) beg letters she got from PR folks wanting her to blog about their product: (minor NSFW language) http://thebloggess.com/heres-a-picture-of-wil-wheaton-collating-papers/

[CrazyDaffodilLady]

There's a slightly NSFW story over on Jezebel right now: "Don't Ask Writers to Work for Free Unless You Want an Eloquent *bleep!* Off' ", plus lots of reader comments about how someone expected them to be falling all over themselves to do {insert pricey job/favor/request here} for squat in return.

One of my all-time favorite internet stories is of Missy the Missing Cat, in which a graphics designer is asked by a coworker to make up a poster for her missing cat.
http://www.thefunctionkey.com/2010/08/missing-missy-purposely-lost-in-translation/

[LazyDaisy]

David Thorne, the designer for the Missing Missy poster, also has a good response for a client, Simon, who wants him to design a logo and some pie charts, for free of course. (Warning: lots of bad language and somewhat naughty logo designs)

http://www.27bslash6.com/p2p2.html


I love the Missing Missy story. I've been known to employ malicious compliance on a few problem clients.

[Tea Drinker]

okay, I don't know if this goes here or under special snowflake - but this is a new one to me.

I follow my favorite singer on twitter and someone just tweeted him this

(leaving blank)   could you please help me?I'm raising money for Student loan payoff . Click to Donate: http://www.gofundme.com/39rdjo    #gofundme

She seriously wants people to donate to her "pay off my college loan" fund??? 

I just looked at her twitter page and it looks like she has tweeted anyone who is famous - I guess she figures they have a few bucks to spare 

It's spamming like crazy, but I can't quite say I fault the person for trying

It's precisely because it's spamming like crazy that I fault it. Spam completely killed Usenet--which was until then my favorite corner of the Internet--and uses up the majority of the energy, hardware, and money involved in handling email. (Apparently it's now down to 70%, from 90-95% a few years ago, but stopping some of the spammers has also involved significant work. That this person is saying "you never heard of me, please give me money" doesn't make it better than "you never heard of me, buy my Scrabble enhancer" or "You never heard of me, but I have a hundred million pounds hidden away" or "you never heard of me, please forward this prayer to all your friends."

[nutraxfornerves]

I read a story once where a big lottery winner kept a running dollar total of the beg letters that she got. (Some places you have to give your real name to the lottery PR people.) "You just won 100 bazillion dollars, so I just know that you're a kind, charitable person who will give me $XXXX for Y reason."  She quit counting when the total reached 3 or 4 times the amount that she won, and the letters still kept coming in. 

Louisa May Alcott included this in one of her novels an said it was "true tale."

MADAM, As it has pleased Heaven to bless your efforts with a large fortune, I feel no hesitation in asking you to supply funds to purchase a new communion-service for our church. To whatever denomination you belong, you will of course respond with liberality to such a request,

'Respectfully yours,

[Elfmama]

I read a story once where a big lottery winner kept a running dollar total of the beg letters that she got. (Some places you have to give your real name to the lottery PR people.) "You just won 100 bazillion dollars, so I just know that you're a kind, charitable person who will give me $XXXX for Y reason."  She quit counting when the total reached 3 or 4 times the amount that she won, and the letters still kept coming in. 

Louisa May Alcott included this in one of her novels an said it was "true tale."

MADAM, As it has pleased Heaven to bless your efforts with a large fortune, I feel no hesitation in asking you to supply funds to purchase a new communion-service for our church. To whatever denomination you belong, you will of course respond with liberality to such a request,

'Respectfully yours,

Aha, but there the beggar is well above the level of "U has lotz of munny, gimme some!" and not just because it is literately crafted.  No, this beggar is dragging poor God into it, AND making the implied threat that God will withdraw his favor if the new communion-service is not funded forthwith.  Kind of like a Godfatherish threat "Nice fortune you got here.  Be a shame if somethin' happened to it!"

[BB-VA]

I read a story once where a big lottery winner kept a running dollar total of the beg letters that she got. (Some places you have to give your real name to the lottery PR people.) "You just won 100 bazillion dollars, so I just know that you're a kind, charitable person who will give me $XXXX for Y reason."  She quit counting when the total reached 3 or 4 times the amount that she won, and the letters still kept coming in. 

Louisa May Alcott included this in one of her novels an said it was "true tale."

MADAM, As it has pleased Heaven to bless your efforts with a large fortune, I feel no hesitation in asking you to supply funds to purchase a new communion-service for our church. To whatever denomination you belong, you will of course respond with liberality to such a request,

'Respectfully yours,

Aha, but there the beggar is well above the level of "U has lotz of munny, gimme some!" and not just because it is literately crafted.  No, this beggar is dragging poor God into it, AND making the implied threat that God will withdraw his favor if the new communion-service is not funded forthwith.  Kind of like a Godfatherish threat "Nice fortune you got here.  Be a shame if somethin' happened to it!"

It was the "you will of course respond" that always got to me.  (It's from Jo's Boys, BTW).

[Piratelvr1121]

$50 a tank is really getting to me.

Ha ha ha ha haaa.  $50!  Ha ha ha!  (UK bitterness)

Tell me about it. £70 to fill my car each week, that's 133.62NZD.

My jaw dropped when my bff told me what petrol costs per gallon when she went there last March.  About $10 to a gallon makes our $3.34 cents look cheap.

[ladyknight1]

Lots of spam to the university over the last few weeks about linguistics software and services. I have received 5 so far.

[Margo]

$50 a tank is really getting to me.

Ha ha ha ha haaa.  $50!  Ha ha ha!  (UK bitterness)

Tell me about it. £70 to fill my car each week, that's 133.62NZD.

My jaw dropped when my bff told me what petrol costs per gallon when she went there last March.  About $10 to a gallon makes our $3.34 cents look cheap.

Very cheap ;-)

(I have a lot of friends in the USA. I accidentally derailed a comment thread in facebook once when people were talking about the cost of gas. one friend had posted a picture of their local gas station, and (being half asleep and not picking up on the point they were making) posted a comment about how cheap it was.  Their post was to flag up how expensive their local gas station was...)

[Slartibartfast]

That said, Americans regularly drive much longer distance than most Europeans do - unless you're in a big city with a metro system, there's just no other way to get around.  My friends and I drive to NearbyCity (~100 mi / 160 km away) on a regular basis for meetings, concerts, conferences, etc., and think nothing of it.  Some Americans spend two to three hours a day on their commute to/from work.

[nutraxfornerves]

I just heard from a nice gentleman in West Africa who needs help securing "ten million Great British Pounds." That's reassuring. I'd hate to think I was being offered Mediocre British Pounds.

[ica171]

okay, I don't know if this goes here or under special snowflake - but this is a new one to me.

I follow my favorite singer on twitter and someone just tweeted him this

(leaving blank)   could you please help me?I'm raising money for Student loan payoff . Click to Donate: http://www.gofundme.com/39rdjo    #gofundme

She seriously wants people to donate to her "pay off my college loan" fund? ?? 

I just looked at her twitter page and it looks like she has tweeted anyone who is famous - I guess she figures they have a few bucks to spare 

It's spamming like crazy, but I can't quite say I fault the person for trying

I read a story once where a big lottery winner kept a running dollar total of the beg letters that she got. (Some places you have to give your real name to the lottery PR people.) "You just won 100 bazillion dollars, so I just know that you're a kind, charitable person who will give me $XXXX for Y reason."  She quit counting when the total reached 3 or 4 times the amount that she won, and the letters still kept coming in. 

Similarly, I suspect that Favorite Singer could give away every penny that he earns, and people would still hound him for more.

I caught a few minutes of one of those TLC "I won the lottery" shows a few years back, and it showed a woman checking her email. There were people asking for money for charity or to pay the rent, but there was also someone asking for money for a new big screen TV. I guess at least they were honest about why they wanted the money.

[Snooks]

That said, Americans regularly drive much longer distance than most Europeans do - unless you're in a big city with a metro system, there's just no other way to get around.  My friends and I drive to NearbyCity (~100 mi / 160 km away) on a regular basis for meetings, concerts, conferences, etc., and think nothing of it.  Some Americans spend two to three hours a day on their commute to/from work.

Not sure if this is still the case but US cars used to have much worse fuel economy than UK cars (and we have different gallons).  My car does about 37.5 miles per US gallon.

[Slartibartfast]

That said, Americans regularly drive much longer distance than most Europeans do - unless you're in a big city with a metro system, there's just no other way to get around.  My friends and I drive to NearbyCity (~100 mi / 160 km away) on a regular basis for meetings, concerts, conferences, etc., and think nothing of it.  Some Americans spend two to three hours a day on their commute to/from work.

Not sure if this is still the case but US cars used to have much worse fuel economy than UK cars (and we have different gallons).  My car does about 37.5 miles per US gallon.

Some of the smaller, more fuel-efficient cars get in the 30-40 range, but you can also find cars here that get half that.