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Author Topic: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers  (Read 2583184 times)

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RebeccainGA

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1170 on: June 21, 2013, 12:16:37 PM »
I knit and I love making gifts for loved ones (cabled fingerless gloves for Christmas gifts one year was such a huge hit!), but then the beggars come out.  'Ohhhh, I saw those gloves you made for X, can you make some for me and my DD's and my mother and every family member I have?".  Sure, no problem.  I charge $20 + yarn for each pair.  Oh the wailing and teeth gnashing!  You charge????  I have to buy yarn??? (and I will only knit with quality yarn..I hate red heart) But you looooove to knit...you must have a ton of yarn!  Why yes, I do love to knit, and yes I do have a lot of yarn, for my personal use.  I then tell them a neck warmer I made (it was an awesome project!) sold for $150 (to a set designer for The Dark Knight Rises!!!) and their eyes pop out of their heads.  Just because someone has a hobby doesn't mean we will want to do something for you (general)..it costs money people!!!

I make lanyards - beaded ones, nice glass beads, smooth at the neck and more interesting near the badge. I make them *for me* because I can't wear something clipped at my belt, and I have to have my badge to even go to the ladies' room in my office.

A coworker asked me if I'd make her one, special. I said sure, and told her that I'd even do it for nothing if she bought the materials (in this case, she's a friend, and I was thinking about starting to sell them, so another person wearing them would help). I told her it would cost about $25 for the materials she wanted (semi-precious beads and sterling beads). She backed out, fast. Sure, my go-to lanyard was only about $5 to make, but I had the beads as part of many larger containers I'd bought, and all mine are glass - most of the cost was findings. Aggravates me to no end when the 'must have the nicest materials' and the 'too cheap to pay' get together.

Kiara

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1171 on: June 21, 2013, 12:26:29 PM »
I knit and I love making gifts for loved ones (cabled fingerless gloves for Christmas gifts one year was such a huge hit!), but then the beggars come out.  'Ohhhh, I saw those gloves you made for X, can you make some for me and my DD's and my mother and every family member I have?".  Sure, no problem.  I charge $20 + yarn for each pair.  Oh the wailing and teeth gnashing!  You charge????  I have to buy yarn??? (and I will only knit with quality yarn..I hate red heart) But you looooove to knit...you must have a ton of yarn!  Why yes, I do love to knit, and yes I do have a lot of yarn, for my personal use.  I then tell them a neck warmer I made (it was an awesome project!) sold for $150 (to a set designer for The Dark Knight Rises!!!) and their eyes pop out of their heads.  Just because someone has a hobby doesn't mean we will want to do something for you (general)..it costs money people!!!

*facepalm*  I knit - I knit VERY simple stuff.  My friend is a wonderful knitter with patterns on Ravelry for sale.  I was admiring two of her items, and she offered to make them for me, since I'm not a good enough knitter.  I now understand why she was so stunned when I offered to pay for them.
Rogers/Barnes 2016 - With You 'til the End of the Line.

cwm

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1172 on: June 21, 2013, 03:07:15 PM »
I knit and I love making gifts for loved ones (cabled fingerless gloves for Christmas gifts one year was such a huge hit!), but then the beggars come out.  'Ohhhh, I saw those gloves you made for X, can you make some for me and my DD's and my mother and every family member I have?".  Sure, no problem.  I charge $20 + yarn for each pair.  Oh the wailing and teeth gnashing!  You charge????  I have to buy yarn??? (and I will only knit with quality yarn..I hate red heart) But you looooove to knit...you must have a ton of yarn!  Why yes, I do love to knit, and yes I do have a lot of yarn, for my personal use.  I then tell them a neck warmer I made (it was an awesome project!) sold for $150 (to a set designer for The Dark Knight Rises!!!) and their eyes pop out of their heads.  Just because someone has a hobby doesn't mean we will want to do something for you (general)..it costs money people!!!

*facepalm*  I knit - I knit VERY simple stuff.  My friend is a wonderful knitter with patterns on Ravelry for sale.  I was admiring two of her items, and she offered to make them for me, since I'm not a good enough knitter.  I now understand why she was so stunned when I offered to pay for them.

I offered to buy my friend the fabric, stuffing, and pay for his time to make me an Adipose plushie. He had just done some plushie dragons, and was wanting to try some more things, but he was floored that I would offer to pay. He said that he'd had about five or six other people asking for things for free.

He didn't end up making it for me, but at least he knows I'm willing to pay for the work he does if/when he does have time.

LazyDaisy

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1173 on: June 21, 2013, 04:30:41 PM »
The moochers that are the worst as far as I'm concerned are those that want me to teach them how to do something for free. I get those requests more often than the "make X for free" requests. People get annoyed that I'm actually more willing to do the project for them rather than "just show them how to do X." First, I spent considerable amounts of time and money learning the basic technical skills; then I've acquired a great deal more knowledge during my 16-year career by continuing with classes as well as learning from experience; and finally, if everyone knows what I know, I won't be able to earn a living.

To me it isn't raw materials or tools that are really valuable, it's the knowledge of how to use them. I can go buy the most expensive top-of-the-line hammer on the planet, but it won't make me a carpenter even though I understand the rudimentary way to operate it. And the hammer will never build anything by itself, nor will a big pile of wood arrange itself into a house, no matter how rare or expensive they are. But I've met so many people who seem to think that if they've spent all the money to purchase the same tools or materials as a professional, they have everything they need to do it on their own, but it's nothing for me to "just show them how..."
"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools." ó Douglas Adams

Thipu1

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1174 on: June 21, 2013, 04:51:11 PM »
We had the ' you'll do it for free' all the time in the library. 

We had two young ladies who wanted to read a particular book.  Unfortunately, the book was only available in German.

  Of course, there would be no problem.  We had a volunteer who was a native German speaker. She'd be happy to sit down with the readers and translate the book sentence by sentence for them, wouldn't she?   


mime

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1175 on: June 21, 2013, 05:41:30 PM »
I hear you guys. In our free time, DH likes to build computers, and I make bean-to-bar chocolate. We don't do it because it saves any money; reality is quite the opposite! Lots of people don't understand that, and think we're turning this stuff out in mass every day, so why shouldn't we make some for them?

If only my house really was a chocolate factory...


NyaChan

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1176 on: June 21, 2013, 06:09:33 PM »
It really bugs me when people don't realize the value of things that are made.  I occasionally make knitted gifts for friends or family members, but these occurrences are pretty few and far between because for a gift I want to use nice yarn and that stuff adds up in expenses pretty fast.  Then I hear comments from third parties about how its nice that a student like me can make something cheap since I don't have a job.  If I were raised by a lesser woman, I would be sorely tempted to tell the busybodies just how much my "cheap" knitted item cost to make.

*inviteseller

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1177 on: June 21, 2013, 07:31:16 PM »
It is not just the cost of the yarn (Berocco makes some great economical yarns but for the larger projects I tend to go up the yarn chain price wise), but it is the work involved.  I love making the fingerless cabled gloves because they are easy, but then you get into everyone popping a baby wants a patterned baby blanket, or the intricate neck warmers I make and they take time.  I was approached by the class mom when older DD was in 3rd grade to make a baby blanket for the shower the kids were throwing for the teacher.  Not a basic Blanket, but a pattern handed to me (doable but intricate), and oh by the way, can I have this done in 2 weeks?  Well, gee, let me put aside other PTA business, coaching soccer, working 45 hrs a week, and raising DD by myself to get on that.  Good thing, on my own I had found out what colors teacher was using for her nursery and was more than 1/2 way done with a beautiful blanket.  I was angry though that they wanted me to give that to the class mom to give as a gift from her and also kick in $25 for the other gifts!  Little did they know (as we kept it between us) the teacher's husband and my step sister's husband are cousins..so I was doing the blanket as a family gift!

Elfmama

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1178 on: June 21, 2013, 08:40:10 PM »
"you shouldn't charge so much for this, afterall, it's something you like to do".

Said in variations to both my quilts and my glass work.
I got this as a variation from my own DH!  Seems that if there is a hobby that you like to do, it takes no physical effort at all.  Because you know, scoring and breaking a clean line of glass, or leaning over a table holding down a ruler with one hand and snugging a rotary cutter against it with the other hand while simultaneously pressing down and forward to make the cut -- THOSE don't take any effort at ALL, right? 
« Last Edit: June 21, 2013, 08:51:15 PM by Elfmama »
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Common sense is not a gift, but a curse.  Because then
you have to deal with all the people who don't have it.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

CrazyDaffodilLady

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1179 on: June 21, 2013, 09:16:14 PM »
Kids are the most demanding irresponsible moochers ever.  :)

I make dream catchers and offered some I happened to have to a friendís grandchildren.  The grandson wanted me to make him one in different colors, with feathers (I hate feathers).  Granddaughter #1 lost hers and wanted another, in certain colors with certain features.  Granddaughter #2's got chewed up by the dog, and she wanted a designer replacement. 

Now Iím told their cousin wants one. 

Each child wants theirs to have every embellishment any of the others got, plus more. 

And the colors they want make me cringe.  For example, camouflage and neon orange.

At least they say "thank you". 
It takes two people to play tug of war. If you don't want to play, don't pick up the rope.

Elfmama

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1180 on: June 21, 2013, 10:26:02 PM »
I can't find the post now, but I remember one made some years ago where the poster was crocheting a toy (as a gift?) and a random child demanded that the OP give it to her.  When she said no, Random Child's mother demanded that the OP hand it over, because she could always make another one.  When the OP continued to refuse, they tried to steal it.  IIRC, they also tried to convince an authority figure to intervene on their behalf.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Common sense is not a gift, but a curse.  Because then
you have to deal with all the people who don't have it.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Minmom3

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1181 on: June 21, 2013, 10:57:04 PM »
My SIL did that to her brother one Christmas Day.  We were all in our 30's, and MIL had given BIL #4 a large Kermit The Frog.  SIL (child #5) and her family were there, and her son DEMANDED Kermit, and screamed when denied it.  SIL got up in her brother's face, demanding that he let her son hold Kermit, and was furiously angry when he refused.  He knew, as did the rest of us, that nephew would never have returned it (the kid was 2, after all...) and SIL would not have made him, and BIL loved the Kermit and intended to keep it.  Kermit was carefully guarded until BIL took him home at the end of his visit.  MIL, who rarely told SIL no, was not brought in, and did not intervene on nephew's behalf, most likely because Kermit was not cheap, and nephew would have destroyed him, and Kermit was a gift for somebody ELSE!   >:(  Yet one more episode in the the ongoing series starring SIL , "I Want What I Want, and I Want It Right NOW!"
Double MIL now; not yet a Grandma.  Owner of Lard Butt Noelle, kitteh extraordinaire!

bloo

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1182 on: June 22, 2013, 08:41:54 AM »
I hear you guys. In our free time, DH likes to build computers, and I make bean-to-bar chocolate. We don't do it because it saves any money; reality is quite the opposite! Lots of people don't understand that, and think we're turning this stuff out in mass every day, so why shouldn't we make some for them?

If only my house really was a chocolate factory...

I hear you!

DH is an avid hunter and fisherman. He catches and cleans anywhere from 125-175 lbs of filets each year (small whitefish - so it's A LOT of fish and A LOT of work) and then I finish the cleaning and packing for the freezer (no small job for me and the kids). It takes many trips out to one of three lakes he goes to, often times coming back empty-handed. He enjoys fishing, we enjoy eating the fish and hosting at least one large fishfry a year, but we do NOT save money when one factors in the cost of his motor, insurance, gas, bait, equipment and license.

You'd be surprised at the number of people that have invited us to dinner at their house with the request, "We'll make the sides, you just bring the fish." :o To one of them that had repeated that request, my husband responded with, "Okay, buy some steaks and it'll be surf-n-turf," to which the gentleman looked like :o! Then the guy said, "but you've got all that fish!" like DH just walks into a wading pool in our backyard with a net and they all magically clean themselves and jump into our freezer.

Now, mind you, we frequently show hospitality and we usually serve fish (unless we know a guest dislikes it) and we've sometimes chosen to give a couple pounds here and there as gifts but at our discretion.

One should never presume to receive a gift from someone's hobby!


KB

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1183 on: June 22, 2013, 08:49:47 PM »
bloo, if you are invited again, I would go along and bring fish - uncleaned, ungutted, completely whole (eyes and all) fresh from the pond! After all, they never said you had to bring the fish ready to cook! Let them discover just how much work it is...

bloo

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1184 on: June 22, 2013, 10:23:14 PM »
bloo, if you are invited again, I would go along and bring fish - uncleaned, ungutted, completely whole (eyes and all) fresh from the pond! After all, they never said you had to bring the fish ready to cook! Let them discover just how much work it is...

 ;D


Just one more time and I think I will....