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Author Topic: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers  (Read 2017038 times)

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nutraxfornerves

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1410 on: July 24, 2013, 04:06:31 PM »
I think I see a flaw in your logic

From Customers Suck. No language issues in the OP, but I won't vouch for subsequent posts.
« Last Edit: July 24, 2013, 10:24:34 PM by nutraxfornerves »

Nutrax
The plural of anecdote is not data

Softly Spoken

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1411 on: July 24, 2013, 09:43:51 PM »
[_url=http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showthread.php?t=100443]I think I see a flaw in your logic[/url]

From Customers Suck. No language issues in the OP, but I won't vouch for subsequent posts.
:o :o :o

Ow-ow-ow! My brain! Why didn't you warn me?

*curls into fetal position to pray for humanity's future*
"... for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so."
-William Shakespeare

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Elfmama

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1412 on: July 25, 2013, 08:53:33 AM »
Just for giggles, I used the auto-translator on a message in Japanese that was in my spambox.   This is what I got (bolding mine):

Quote
How are you doing

 Is not it busy, I'm sorry for this.

 The thought or perhaps, even as I wonder if I have forgotten about me. .

 It was then also changed the addy,
 Facebook's other friends for,
 Contact tool here, I have more friends in Chikashii for.

 Because I think that's here for the first time, I was invited.

 Because know if Moraere Fetch the account,
 I will get cancer you.

 I will wait.


 It is extremely hot, please be careful to health this year.


 Makiko

I don't know, honey, have you forgotten about you?  Who changed the addy?  And are you getting cancer, or are you threatening to somehow give it to me?  That doesn't square at all with the concern for my health in the heat.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Common sense is not a gift, but a curse.  Because then
you have to deal with all the people who don't have it.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

NyaChan

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1413 on: July 25, 2013, 01:12:43 PM »
Moocher -

My Cousin was visiting from India. She stayed for about a month with us and a couple months with my other Uncle.  Her parents are very well off and gave her spending money which she never used because she and her parents don't want to spend when they visit as they know they can get the relatives to cover them.  It always worked until one day I got sick of it because she was pulling it with all us kids.  Us American cousins ALWAYS go dutch because we get so irritated with the adult posturing over making the big gesture and whatnot over checks and tickets.

So the 5 of us went to Panera, and she asked me what was good to get there.  I told her that I was getting a souffle.  She asked me if it was good, and I said I liked it and described it so she'd know what it was.  She said she'd get that too.  Then I got to the counter, ordered my souffle, and paid for it.  I turned and she was just kind of standing there spaced out, so I asked - "Aren't you going to get anything?"  She responds, "The soufflé" and looked at my bag expectantly as she started to move towards me.  I had had enough at that point and just said "Well this is what I ordered for myself.  You are next in line, so go ahead and order one for you."   And walked away. 

AmethystAnne

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1414 on: July 25, 2013, 02:33:25 PM »
Very good, NyaChan!  ;D

buvezdevin

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1415 on: July 25, 2013, 07:48:33 PM »
I think versions of this have already been mentioned by one or more PPs, but I just received a call in which a live person launched into a spiel as soon as I answered:  "hello! I am (guy's name) from emergency medical equipment, calling to confirm your shipment..."  And I will never know what he was trying to get me to agree to receive/sign up for, or how the rest of the script went.  I had been looking at eHell when the phone rang, this thread sprang to mind, I started laughing out loud (for realz) managed to say "you've got to be kidding" and hung up.
Never refuse to do a kindness unless the act would work great injury to yourself, and never refuse to take a drink -- under any circumstances.
Mark Twain

magician5

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1416 on: July 25, 2013, 09:28:41 PM »
I think versions of this have already been mentioned by one or more PPs, but I just received a call in which a live person launched into a spiel as soon as I answered:  "hello! I am (guy's name) from emergency medical equipment, calling to confirm your shipment..."  And I will never know what he was trying to get me to agree to receive/sign up for, or how the rest of the script went.  I had been looking at eHell when the phone rang, this thread sprang to mind, I started laughing out loud (for realz) managed to say "you've got to be kidding" and hung up.

The devil of it is ... there's no one listening! This is one of the most uncannily lifelike recordings I've ever heard! I've wanted to tell the guy off, and when I speak there's no response or pause at all, it just keeps playing. I assume that at the end there's some sort of "press 1" instruction.
There is no 'way to peace.' Peace is the way.

lilfox

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1417 on: July 25, 2013, 09:46:24 PM »
We just got one through the mail, but it's pretty lame. Excerpts follow.

"Dear [DH],

I am pleased to inform you that you have qualified for an award of 2 round trip airline tickets. Congratulations. ... The retail value of this award is up to $1,198.00. ... We have attempted contacting you several times without success. This is our last attempt. If we do not hear from you soon, we may need to issue the ticket vouchers to the alternate."

It is signed by "Sue Myer, Vice President" and xeroxed on someone's low-effort attempt at letterhead with "American" and a little triangle logo that kind of looks like the American tourister logo at the top of the page. No return address on envelope or letter (there's an 866 number to call) but it was postmarked out of Arizona. I like the specificity of the prize amount, but the lack of enthusiasm? I mean, not even an exclamation point after "congratulations" says they're barely trying.

Hillia

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1418 on: July 26, 2013, 11:54:33 AM »
We just got one through the mail, but it's pretty lame. Excerpts follow.

"Dear [DH],

I am pleased to inform you that you have qualified for an award of 2 round trip airline tickets. Congratulations. ... The retail value of this award is up to $1,198.00. ... We have attempted contacting you several times without success. This is our last attempt. If we do not hear from you soon, we may need to issue the ticket vouchers to the alternate."

It is signed by "Sue Myer, Vice President" and xeroxed on someone's low-effort attempt at letterhead with "American" and a little triangle logo that kind of looks like the American tourister logo at the top of the page. No return address on envelope or letter (there's an 866 number to call) but it was postmarked out of Arizona. I like the specificity of the prize amount, but the lack of enthusiasm? I mean, not even an exclamation point after "congratulations" says they're barely trying.

I got this same letter and had a nice chuckle over it.

threadjack: the bit about non-English speakers using old-fashioned formal wording reminded me of some charming  speech patterns common to my Indian coworkers.  One is 'come to know' for 'found out'.  Another is 'today morning' for 'this morning'.  And the ever popular 'please do the needful' when making a request.  So:  'Today morning I came to know that the XYZ report is due a day early,  Please do the needful to ensure is is ready'.  I don't know why, but these patterns always make me smile.

Twik

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1419 on: July 26, 2013, 12:07:33 PM »
This one is as short as it is ridiculous:

Quote
My wife and I decided to donate the sum of $2,000,000.00 usd to you as part of our charity project,please see the link:http://www.wjla.com/articles/2013/02/virginia-powerball-winner-dave-honeywell-identified-as-200-million-plus-winner[redacted]

Gee. You have just won 200 million dollars, and for charity you're going to give 1% of it to a completely unknown person, who isn't actually in much need of charity?
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."

jedikaiti

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1420 on: July 26, 2013, 12:08:15 PM »
This one is as short as it is ridiculous:

Quote
My wife and I decided to donate the sum of $2,000,000.00 usd to you as part of our charity project,please see the link:http://www.wjla.com/articles/2013/02/virginia-powerball-winner-dave-honeywell-identified-as-200-million-plus-winner[redacted]

Gee. You have just won 200 million dollars, and for charity you're going to give 1% of it to a completely unknown person, who isn't actually in much need of charity?

Send it to me - I could use it!
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

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nutraxfornerves

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1421 on: July 26, 2013, 01:42:11 PM »
The free plane ticket scam. This is from the Arizona Better Business Bureau

Quote
When consumers call the toll free number listed on either of the letters they are invited to attend a 90 minute presentation at Southwest Travel located at 4811 E Grant Rd STE 261 in Tucson. Callers are told that this promotion is sponsored by Southwest Travel and they aren't required to buy or join anything. Callers are told they are required to provide two forms of identification in order to attend the presentation: a photo I.D. and a major credit card.

Attendees are instructed to arrive 15 minutes prior to the presentation so they have time to fill out and sign a questionnaire. According to a questionnaire provided by a consumer, attendees are asked for their complete contact information, age, marital status, employment status, combined household income, citizenship, any travel benefits they currently use, and whether or not they presented a major credit card or debit card at the time of check in. The following disclaimer is included (in part): The purpose of your visit is to introduce you to our unique concept of travel by means of a personalized presentation. In order to receive your promotional gifts, all we request is 90 minutes of your time to attend an informative presentation describing the exciting vacation opportunities Southwest Travel has to offer. To extend our thanks for your participation today, you will receive one or more promotional certificate(s). Retail Value of this promotion varies between $1,100 to $3,100 depending on which destination you chose. Depending on the promotional gift certificate, traveler will be responsible for such expenses as taxes, deposits, transportation, gratuities and any applicable fees. Depending on the promotional certificate(s) offered, the deposits may be refundable or non-refundable.

[snip]
Consumers who have attended tell BBB that the program offered is a private travel club. The up front cost of the program is $8,995. Members pay a one time $399 "documentation fee" and an annual membership fee of $199. Other packages for lesser prices are offered, according to consumers. The presenter indicates that on average, members will recoup the cost of the membership after they've taken just three trips. Consumers say that if they have questions during the presentation they are encouraged to write their questions down to be answered by their appointed representative following the presentation. Consumers say that after sitting through the presentation they are required to wait before they can claim their airline vouchers and rebate certificates and other "gifts".

The sales pitch is for a so-called "travel club," which will save you a gazillion on travel costs in the future. People who fall for it discover that when they try to book something, it's not available, it is more expensive than booking elsewhere,  or the so-called "travel supplier" doesn't exist.  They also never get the free plane tickets.

Nutrax
The plural of anecdote is not data

jaxsue

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1422 on: July 26, 2013, 01:53:30 PM »
I don't think I've posted this here yet. Recently I had the frustrating experience of talking an elderly friend out of sending $45 that, according to a letter she received, would enable her to collect over $1 million in a raffle she hadn't even entered. She's in AZ, I'm in NJ, and the HQ's for this company was in Long Island. She wanted me to drive to LI to see if it was legit! She kept insisting.  :P

I looked up the company and found that it had so many lawsuits against it it was ridiculous. After showing her all kinds of proof that it was a scam, she reluctantly agreed to toss the letter. Sheesh.

nutraxfornerves

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1423 on: July 29, 2013, 07:08:26 PM »
I got a gem in the mail today. It was one of those "security" mailers, where you have to tear off the ends to open it. On the front it said "Personal and Confidential" and "Do Not Bend. Check Enclosed." Right. Reputable companies always print "Hey thieves! Steal this one!" on their envelopes.

I opened it up and there was indeed a check inside, made out to me for $49,000. It took a minute but I finally found the "This is Not Negotiable" printed on the bottom.

It was attached to a notice that informed me that I was Guaranteed!!!! to win one of the following: A Porsche Boxter or $49,000; a swell Caribbean cruise or $2000; or $500. Not only that, but on arrival Huh? Arrival where? I'd get my choice of an Android tablet or a fabulous vacation in either Las Vegas or San Diego (they'll even pay the tax.)

I have to call some number within 72 hours Naturally, they know exactly when I will receive the mail to claim the prize.

I turned it over. On the back of the "check" there is even a place to endorse it. Below that, in about 1 point type, are the disclaimers. The offer is only for married couples or "couples similarly committed." You have to be between 35 and 75, and make at least US$50,000 per year. When you call, you will have to provide a valid credit card number.

You agree to attend a 90 minute presentation for, I'll call them, Swell Vacations. After you sit through it, you will be given a scratch-off card. You scratch 6 of the 36 squares to determine what you won. They go into all the legal stuff about the odds of winning each prize (that "guaranteed winner" does not seem to apply). If no one wins the car, they will hold a drawing for it.

I looked them up. They are selling you an opportunity to become a travel agent, so you can get travel agent discounts and access to timeshares. People said they got a hard sell to spend about $4000.

Nutrax
The plural of anecdote is not data

Twik

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Re: S/O Beggars, Moochers and Scammers
« Reply #1424 on: August 02, 2013, 10:09:56 AM »
This one's a little different, although still vastly amusing:

Quote
Hi,
I am Mr.[redacted] , Head of Luggage/Baggage storage facilities here at the Hartsfield-Jackson A t l
a n t a I n t er n a t i o n a l Airport U S A.

I am contacting you regarding to an abandoned consignment boxes in our storage facility and which the custom scan report of the boxes revealed an undisclosed sum of US dollar bill in it which could be approximately 3-4M dollars and the details of the consignment including your name are tagged on the Two Metal Trunk boxes.

The consignment boxes were abandoned here by a Diplomat from UK due to his inability to pay the required fee $2,300 for the Non-Inspection Fee which i am ready to pay it But I will require you give me 30% of the Fund once i deliever it and you take 70% before we proceed, Get Back if you are ready .

Mr.[redacted]
INSPECTION OFFICER

At least this one is a clear-cut offer of "I am a crook, and I hope you are too".
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."