Bat Mitzvah and Ceremony/Luncheon Question

[Girlie]

I fall into the category of "don't worry about it" since you are close friends with the parents and you've been given the all-clear.

Sometimes, relationships change etiquette. What's okay to do with or in front of your family is not cool in front of total strangers. Same with friends. There's more generally more leniency with those that you call friends and family, and I think this is one of those times when it benefits you.

[Hmmmmm]

I would be fine with your choice.  My kids went through confirmation at age 13 and we had a reception afterwards for close family and friends, though nothing as elaborate as the Bar and Bat Mitzvah celebrations my kid's friends had.  I was fine with some attending the luncheon only.  I also know it is common in our area for many people to only attend the celebrations and not the ceremony.